Adriana Lima was at one point the hottest woman Victoria’s Secret ever recruited, that was probably 20 years ago by now, and in her late 30s, after having a few kids due to catholicism and poor decision making…she’s never fully bounced back and has a serious boxy mom body….that’s not to say she’s not a hot mom, not a fit money, not a low body fat mom, it’s just to say she looks like the middle aged mom she is, but she’s their leader, the den mother, the day shift stripper still going in because the strip club owner feels bad for her, and I guess they need to milk her for what they pay her, and doing video they can’t photoshop was the answer…

But she knows her angles and they know if they edit it like a strobe like to instil epileptic seizures as to not allow people to notice her flaws…..

Here she is doing a terrible interview about the fragrence…

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Adriana Lima has been working out because she’s really got no choice. She hit 30, had a bunch of kids due to immaculate conception, because I remember at one point in her career she was really committed to her catholicism and was a half naked – virgin…right…

Well, thanks to getting older, and having kids, she’s got a really weird boxy body – and at 35 – it’s not an abnormal body, it’s a totally acceptable body…the muscle tone, the thin legs…it’s ok…I’d want my middle aged wife and mother of my kids to look like this – it’s better than the alternative…but as an ambassador still getting paid by the evil corporation that created her and that she’s still in contract with – it’s weird, it’s not hot and even she knows she’s falling off, otherwise she wouldn’t be hiding her ass and boxy mid-section…

She’s now more a den mother, the top stripper at the strip club who works the day shit for her stage shows, but still gives private dances to her regulars during the busier night shift…replaced by the young youngs…but still getting her tits grabbed for 10 bucks a song – it’s all she knows…

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This is really uninteresting pictures of Adriana Lima for Vogue Brasil…but I guess she’s Brazilian pride, who has left the most violent alleys of Rio…and Zika virus…where Olympic Athletes are starting to fill up their athlete villages…where they are getting abducted, robbed and gunpoint and diseased enough to make babies with mini-heads…to make it in the world on the international scale…

But who Brazil can reference when they need some good press, like sure people get killed everyday on the streets shopping innocent multiple times a day here, but have you seen Adriana Lima, that bitch was hot right? Go Brazil!

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Yesterday….I posted pictures of Adriana Lima in a bikini while in Mykonos for one of her model sister’s retirement party/ where her model sister was securing her retirement package by marrying a billionaire…something other models never miss because they love a good party, they are models…and more importantly they like seeing the less famous Brazilians come out on top financially due to love…it reminds them of the Brazilian sex trade they escaped but still touch on because modeling is hooking..

Well, my friends at Mykonos TV got some amazing footage, not from a critical point of view, you know because I’m a film historian / art critic / have the natural ability to spot talent and good production value…being an uneducated hater of all things….

But because it’s authentic paparazzi, it’s some dude getting 100 feet away from her and sneaking a video on his phone while she splashes around all boring as fuck….but still in a bikini..

It’s the creepy shot stealing that MAKE me feel alive….in a world of zero authenticity, everything posed, nothing organic or just happening…even snapchat – designed to be live action – is posed and people take 40 snaps before posting the perfect one…

We are surrounded by lies…but one thing that is real…is that Lima is Aging..oh and that she’s at the beach in Mykonos being filmed unsuspected…brilliant!

VIDEO ONE!

VIDEO TWO!

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Brazilan bikini model Ana Beatriz Barros just got married in Mykonos – which means that all the other Brazilian Victoria’s Secret model old timers had to show up, because it’s how fake friendships prosper…

I assume this is the video of her demonstrating the Model Retirement Pension by marrying some rich guy…love is such a beautiful thing…..isn’t it…especially when set in a lovely setting…and the person you’re marrying is a fucking billionaire…you know…an actual billionaire named Karim El Chaity…not bad for some poor as fuck Brazilian who happened to be tall and hot…good fucking play…all it took was some strategic placement and boom – love….rich as fuck love….

I guess the more interesting thing with destination weddings – possibly where they met or where they first fucked on some chartered cruise – or somewhere they think is romantic….

OR – maybe because it is where Lohan celebrated her Billionaire fiance trip….classy….

But their hot model guests, even when barrel chested, old and washed up…get into bikinis…while waiting for the big day…GLORIOUS….Adriana Lima still looking good….probably with a billionaire of her own – because millionaires are not for Victoria’s Secret models….too poor for that pussy admission fee.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

I guess the bachelorette party was in Ibiza with Alessandra Ambrosio – who was celebrating the brazilian model retirement plan…

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Adriana Lima is old, possibly menopausal, definitely boxy in her Victoria’s Secret fashion show walks, definitely not so bad when photoshopped, or when the very Catholic, but not too catholic to get nude for money, who was once rumored to be a virgin because of her faith, before having a series of kids before turning 30, destoying her body….as kids normally do..even when there is a multi million dollar contract on that body…something people forget when they are at the top of their game, they think it’s forever…and I guess in Lima’s case it is…because even when falling apart…she still out there doing it..fascinating…

But not as fascintating as how lifting a leg to get into a car makes an old ass perky…I call this the pose of the middled aged mom after her fitness class….

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Lima Bean from Victoria’s Secret fame has been slowing filling out, getting more and more boxy as she nears menopause….already a mom of two thanks to being a Catholic who doesn’t believe in safe sex, but who also was a virgin for her early Victoria’s Secret year, at least that was the rumor I’ll never believe, since all half naked models are whores….and real Catholic models don’t really exist because half naked modeling is against their religion….

She’s still got a great face though….boxy girls are still boxy but this one has one of the best faces so here she is in Cannes…for no reason but the scientific observation of the aging process..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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People are still firm believers that Adriana Lima is the hottest model of all time and I would probably agree with them, it’s the eyes…but this girl has not aged well.

Sure in high produced photoshopped pics, she’s great, but in any paparazzi pics, or Victoria’s Secret runway pics, she looks tired, old and fat….just baby weight she couldn’t get rid of…

You know boxy, menopausal even, sloppy….

But in high produced photoshopped pics posing for an Italian bikini brand…she’s great…

These are high produced photoshopped pics posing for an Italian bikini brand.

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I remember when Adriana Lima was one of the hottest girls in modeling..straight off the boat from Brazil, her dark hair and light eyes, coupled with her big natural lips and amazing body just fucking blew everyone away….

Then she turned 30, and for some reason, a reason I call being a mom and a wife and no really caring so much about bouncing back into things since you still have a few years on contract and you still make your weight requirements since fat weighs less than muscle…allowing her to still cash the fuck in despite being boxy and even sloppy…moms…it’s a hell of a sacrifice to make for a woman, who may still be Adriana Lima on paper, but is a far cry from the Adriana Lima you should be jerking off to..

Here she is in a Sunglasses campaign, as there’s no need to really show off that GUNT for sunglass campaigns…and that works out well for her.

Here she is for LOVE magazine – trying to be a bit more sexy and lit in a way you can’t see her boxy gunt…

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