Alessandra Ambrosio is a solid 300 years old at this point. The nice thing about her though, is that she’s manage to slow the rot down and manages to look better than she did when she was young, but I didn’t find her hot when she was young, she was the questionable VS Model, that I assumed had family or friends that worked for the brand because she had a “college soccer player” look to her, which isn’t really a lingerie model I want to fuck look to her….

As it turns out, they don’t cast their whores according to me!

Maybe it’s strategic lighting as posing, she is a prolific catalog model and knows how to present her strong jaw to the world, but it’s probably Botox and face filters who cares….I’m staring at the roundest breasts I’ve seen since that time I made a tranny before trannies were trending and cool show me his bolt on tits….bolted on so tight I thought I was in some small engine mechanic school just look at them….

The good news is that in her 40-something rot, she’s vain enough to stay fit and keep up appearances, because letting herself go would erase her from the world…and she cant have that, there’s too much money to mooch off with those tits.

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Alessandra Ambrosio’s in the water in a bikini, just giving it away for free, all for self promotion or marketing of what I’ll assume is her direct to consumer bikini brand that is likely created and funded by the same people she worked for for 20 years but that they can’t say is the backer, because the whole point of the influencer brand is to reach people who don’t shop at Victoria’s Secret!

I never gave a shit about Ambrosio, she was always the one I wondered about in the mix of talent they had over the years, I figured she just must connect to the basic bruenettes and push product to them, because she was nothing substantial, but at 40 years old, or near 40, she’s looking better than ever, which doesn’t make sense, unless you factor in getting lots of sleep from not working, eating well from being rich and fucking rich, working out and cosmetic procedures, fillers, implants, and photoshop!

But yeah, 40 year old Ambrosio is hotter than 20 year old Ambrosio, make it make sense!

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I guess Alessandra Ambrosio, who is in her 40s, but for some reason looks hotter than she did at 25, which may not be saying much to people like me who thought she was a giant “whatever” when she was getting all that Victoria’s Secret hype, but that should be saying something to those of us who didn’t buy into all her Victoria’s Secret hype, since on a fundamental, biological level…any 25 year old is going to be hotter than their 40 year old version….and I don’t understand it…

Is it baby blood transfusions, STEM CELL TREATMENTS from Brazil, is she on HGH like a male actor in their 40s trying to keep muscle mass, is she getting face injections but subtle so she doesn’t look like a muppet…is it supplements, is it diet, exercise, hydration….or IS IT A CLONE from the same CLONE lab they pulled her out of…because I’m convinced if any brand was CLONING in the 90s and 00s it was Victoria’s Secret working on creating the MASTER woman…probably in labs in Brazil where the law were lacks….but I am not a journalist, I’m a shit poster and this is the shit…

She’s in Hawaii, living her best life of luxury, because California beach life’s not ZEN enough for the endless summer babe…and because bitches at her level are funded…rich guys love being around them thanks to their resumes and with that you get to do nice things all while hardly being impressive at all….just 20 year VS model alum is enough for these people…BRANDED by the right BRAND.

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I don’t know if Alessandra Ambrosio has been on the baby blood diet that is being spread amongst the rich and famous of Los Angeles, you know, since they are evil, but she’s another one of these bitches who I’ve personally SEEN rot or expire like some old Brazilian cheese left on the floor of a fancy MIXER, if said fancy MIXER happened on the internet through slutty paparazzi pics, slutty modelling and slutty selfies….

At the tail end of her Victoria’s Secret career, it was a “when is she going to fucking retire, she’s so fucking old, no one wants to see 40 years olds in lingerie, we fuck 40 year olds in real life, wishing they were 25 year olds in lingerie”….

It was a “GIVE IT UP”…and finally she did…and as we reflected on all her accomplishments, assuming she’d move off to some farm or back in Brazil by the beach where she’d write her autobiography on being a VS model, human trafficked before that was frowned upon, meeting important people when they weren’t as obvious piles of garbage we’ve since learned they are….you know…celebrate that career and realize even at her peak, she wasn’t all that great, like the third tier of the VS models even though the brand loved her…

Since retiring, the 40 year old is hotter than ever and I don’t know how that happens, but I’ll look at the tits instead of digging to deep into the LIE.

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I don’t know what it says about society that Alessandra Ambrosio is hotter now than she was when she was a Victoria’s Secret model for what must have been 15 to 20 years.

I assume it says that people are getting uglier, or old bitches are the only ones who know what my traditional ideas of beauty represent or look like….

So while these fat girls are twerking on faces like a bunch of gutter porn stars they for some weird reason idolize…maybe it’s because porn chicks are accessible and not actually hot which opens the door for other uglies to get jerked off to….because if there’s one thing I know, it’s that breaking into porn is the easiest thing a girl can do…once she drops her morals, values and shame…and chooses that dark and terrible world…but SUBSCRIBERS CAN BUY YOU MANSIONS…

We’re stuck with the old guard as the last standing hot chicks…even though they are too fucking old to be the hot chicks…they represent a better past and give hope of a better tomorrow..

It could just be photoshop, filters and other bullshit, as they do….but Ambrosio at her “hottest” for the brand was the least interesting of the bunch, but now I think she’s hot and this is her in costume…

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