Aubrey O'Day Archives - Page 15 of 15 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Aubrey O’Day Category

2008

Sep

Aubrey O’Day’s Making Out With Her Dog of the Day

A dog’s mouth is rumored to have less bacteria in it than a human’s mouth, which isn’t saying much when that human is Aubrey O’Day and a hooker’s 6 day old, unwashed panties have less bacteria than her mouth, but it is saying something. The truth is I thought it was bad enough that Aubrey had taken it upon herself to take a helpless little animal and turn it into some kind of weird, abused fashion accessory, but seeing that the thing is her personal living sex toy, kinda like you did with the kid down the street and both situations throw me the fuck off. I don’t ever think fucking animals is right, I don’t think exploiting them to draw a little more attention on yourself is right either because dogs are nice and don’t know any better, like that country girl I met at the bus station who let my friend do horrible things to her because she was just trying to find her way.

In the dog’s defense though, it’s only licking back because Aubrey’s mouth smells like cat shit and cat shit is to dogs, what chocolate cake is to my wife. If you know what I mean.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Beastiality

2008

Sep

Aubrey O’Day’s Cruelty To Animals of the Day

5 Comments »

I guess being obnoxious trash in an obnoxious shitty band that was created on an obnoxious garbage show produced by an obnoxious hip hop superstar wasn’t enough for Aubrey O’Day’s quest to get noticed, so she went out and got herself an obnoxious lap dog to take out with her everywhere she goes because she hates being alone, making people ask “who is that girl who brought her dog to the restaurant, that’s kind of inappropriate”, leading Aubrey to think she’s being noticed, recognized and liked until she lifts up her skirt and starts trying to shove a fork into her weathered vagina to see if it’s still breathing, making the people around her forget about the dog, because they are too disgusted, amazed, intrigued or thrown off by what they just witnessed and forgetting about the dog is the totally wrong outcome of this whole getting a dog in the first place, so Aubrey gets back to the attention whore drawing board and realizes that everyone in LA has an obnoxious white lap dog that they take to events, what if she was to decorate her dog like a Christmas tree, then everyone will notice the dynamic duo and this is the result of that brainstorm session…..

The whole thing makes no sense to me, decorating your dog seems like something only serious trash would do. You know the same kind of people who decorate their sweaters with Bedazzlers, or their car dashboard with stuffed animals, or their shitty trailer park home with everything Mickey Mouse…actually it is all starting to make sense…

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|cleavage

2008

Sep

Aubrey O’Day Does Complex Magazine Topless of the Day

7 Comments »

So yesterday I posted the exclusive news that Aubrey O’Day has breast implants, but that was before I saw these pictures of her where I would have realized that we didn’t need whoever the guy being interviewed’s opinion on whether her tits are real or not, because shit look like they were rippped off a fuckin’ sex doll and taped to her chest. The good news is that Complex may be publishing full nipple pictures of her based on one of the pictures and I always support mainstream music and lifestyle magaines making the move to postin’ tits, because tits are really what we all want to look at.

It looks like she grew up with no father, was molested by her stepfather and has been in abusive relationship after abusive relationship all her life and now deals with her shit by lookin like a pornstar and dabbling in lesbianism like she was Lohan all in hopes of getting some positive male attention, but she’s just a rich kid from Palm Springs being a whore that you’d find in the gutter, and that kinda disappoints me, but these pictures don’t.

To See The Rest of the Pictures and Article
GO

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Complex

2008

Aug

Lydia Hearst and Aubrey O’Day Make Out of the Day

6 Comments »

I have been having computer problems so I slept at a friend’s house after passing out there drunk last night because he said I could use his shit. It was a much needed vacation from the hell that is my living situation. I only woke up at 11:30 and my friend was watching Lydia Hearst and Tyson talking about underwear, because today is underwear day and she announced that she doesn’t wear underwear on national TV. Since she’s always been a sweetheart to me on facebook I decided to write her something about how hot I find it that she doesn’t wear underwear and I say these series of facebook status updates…..

Lydia seriously folks…. seeing isn’t believing… some things are just meant for the silver screen…12:54am

Lydia seriously folks…. seeing isn’t believing… some things are just meant for the silver screen…GOTCHA.5:24am

Lydia *NOTE: Last night was for a movie. Thank you to everyone who participated and sorry for those who were unaware of the staged scenes. See Fanpage for more info.6:00am

Lydia Sorry to all the photographers who were unaware that the lesbian scene was publicly staged for a movie; thanks for your participation. More info on my FanPage.11:38am

I didn’t realize what she was talking about, but came across the pics and decided to post them. I am all for girls making out with girls, even if it’s for a cry for attention or if it’s an attempt to make fun of Sam Ronson, Hearts’ trust fund rich kid buddy who went to high school with her and the rumor is that Sam Ronson took Lydia Hearsts’ Fiance to their high school Grad and Lydia Hearst is mad because it ruins their fairytale love story. There’s some scoop for you that you don’t give a fuck about.

The truth is that this is pretty fuckin’ weak making out, they aren’t even bumpin’ cunts and there’s no way this is for the “silver screen” or “staged” or “planned”, it’s just a dumb drunken stunt she’s trying to cover up.

I hate Danity Kane and I didn’t understand why a socialite who is richer than God would be hanging out with a member of a trashy reality TV created Band, but then I realized they were introduced by their hair dresser and sometimes it’s cool to hang out with poor people to feel better about yourself, the same reason why this guy I know throws quarters at homeless people, he feels like they are a good luck charm and give him karma points that will make him have a luckier, better day. Some kind of piss and shit covered, vomiting lucky charm that’s magically disgusting

I am hungover.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Lydia Hearst

2008

Jul

Aubrey O’Day’s Got Some Trashy Cleavage of the Day

5 Comments »

Nothing says I am a classy little whore like putting blush on your implant cleavage to match your little slut cheeks. It’s the kind of trashy glamor that only the high class hookers can afford because they figure since they paid so much for their tits, they should at least decorate them shits like a fucking Christmas tree. I figure since her career is only based on some shitty reality TV produced band, it’s pretty fleeting, but at least she’ll always have her tits.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Tits

2008

Apr

Aubrey O’Day’s Got a Proper See Through Shit On of the Day

2 Comments »

Aubrey O’Day is another slut who thinks she’s more important to the world than she actually is. She’s the kind of girl who catches her boyfriend watching some kind of Jenna Jameson porn and figures she can do that shit too, only instead of porn she does pop singing. She’s the kind of girl who all her life was told she was good enough to be the next Britney Spears but just couldn’t land a break until she saw the casting call from Making of the Band 3 – and then it all fell into place and by fall into to place I mean she’s got a D-List career that she tells herself is a stepping stone but will fizzle out as soon as Making of the Band 4 hits, but at least she knows to not wear bras to get more attention to herself. So maybe I’m wrong, maybe she’s here to stay, but that popularity or success won’t change the fact that she’s useless.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Nipples|See Through