Izabel Goulart is ripped…holy shit…I like it, but I am sure there will be a handful of you who think it’s disgusting and want a sloppy looking Kate Upton to make you feel like a man again…but the truth is I follow this babe on Instagram and she’s perfect, always working out, eating well, and looking so lovely I would sing her love songs outside her bedroom window until the police came and took me away…only to come back again until there was a restraining order set in place…She’s got it going on and it makes me wonder why Victoria’s Secret fired her and got her deported back to brazil…but I guess you should never question the illegal model trafficking industry…

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What a fucking babe…Izabel Goulart is probably best known for being a Brazilian Victoria’s Secret model who either got fired or escaped from Victoria’s Secret, even though I didn’t think they really let any of their immigrant models escape…kinda like a communist regime, only the half naked version, mainly because I thought they abducted these girls from their mother countries, killed off their families and Castro’ed them in the most Glamorous way, by holding them captive…only letting them out to model underwear…that or they were fucking robots because girls generally don’t look like this…

While since that Victoria’s Secret stint, she’s gone onto be the fittest body on instagram, and I love watching her updates, because she’s hot as fuck, especially when kick boxing…

I’m into this.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

I don’t know when my love for skinny girls, I’m talking emaciated half dead, weak and unable to say no or run from my predator instincts, all eating a stick of gum and diet coke for their daily calorie intake, turned into being into healthy and fit girls who don’t do drugs, or smoke, or eat processed food…but it happened….

It probably has something to do with Anorexic chicks not getting their periods and thus not being fertile enough to be considered women despite the vagina hanging out their weak body…and Izabel Goulart, ex Victoria’s Secret model, rocks her fitness game on instagram hard, making following her and jerking off to her pics a little easier and worth doing…here she is in Today’s fitness.

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Izabel Goulart is pretty fucking fit. I guess that’s what happens when you have a taste of the good Victoria’s Secret life and they fire you for no good reason, making you feel like you’re totally inadequate after years of performing for them…you know all up on your high horse killin’it…which is one of my favorite fucking things…because if you’re in a position to make a girl a star and take it the fuck away from her…just to fuck with her mind and her relevance in the world…because you can…is pretty fucking funny to remind her that she’s replaceable…it makes for better blow jobs…or in her case..it makes for more sit-ups…

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Izabel Goulart is really good at Instagram…from her killer fucking bikini body…to her fitness…I think I may be in love…I think this is the Brazilian object of my desire, who I want to sing love songs to and romance into the next great American love story, one that movies will be based on…movies like “ASS RIMMING 19 – ENTER THE BRAZILIAN DRAGON”…not that I know if Brazil even has dragons, but you get what I’m saying, and that is that I’ve never felt a love like this before…that I cherish this love…and that I’ve learned to love again…because he’s fucking amazing…roses and rim jobs and marriage people…that’s all I see.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

I posted Izaebel Goulart GQ pics last week. I thought it was for Mexico and mocked the likelihood of there being much of an office or people working there…you know cuz Mexicans are lazy and would have no budget for photoshoots or even camera equipment……but apparently, it is for GQ Brasil, which would make sense, since it is where she lives and more importantly, where she is celebrated as a big star who made it in America….and thank god for that…because a life without pics of her posing like this is a life not worth living….I mean semi-retired, old tired models doing sexy shit….even if we’ve SEEN IZABEL GOULART LIKE THIS MANY TIMES BEFORE including some pics WITH NIPPLE but I’ll take these pics anyway…

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These pictures of Izabel Goulart are for May’s issue of GQ Mexico, which I like to interpret as “Probably old pics of Izabel Goulart being re-used for a fringe market for GQ” and not actually new pics of her, but I’m not about to go through the Izabel Goulart archives of half naked pics to figure out if these are in fact sloppy seconds, because I don’t really care, I’m ore into just staring them, imagining dirty things I would do to her Brazilian ass, like threaten to have her deported if she doesn’t clean my dick with her mouth faster, and things like that, rather than understanding the GQ Mexico operations, that I can safely assume are one dude in a beater, smoking a cigar, in a cinder block home while his wife is out back milking the Donkey.

Right? Here are the pics.

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It’s Valentines Day in a week and Victoria’s Secret is well aware of that so they are releasing all their catalog pics to the blogs in one massive half naked, photoshopped nipples and vagina, catalog shots of some top models that they have created and groomed into celebrity models….and as much as I hate jerking off to catalog pics…and have since the 80s….sometimes it’s the only thing around…or a nice refreshing change from that one issue of National Geographic on the topless pigmy tribe….or I guess in your case…throat fucking porn. Pervert.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart