When Jessica Alba isn’t selling fake product called “Honest”….because everyone knows anyone who needs to call something “honest”…is full of fucking shit…especially when that person is an actress who’s entire career has been a fucking lie, she didn’t even tell people that she was a fucking Mexican for the longest time…so all these “organic” products contain toxic chemicals and she’s getting busted for her, not that she has ever worked there, or made any decisions ever, or anywhere, she’s just a puppet, the figurehead who sits around a looks pretty enough as a mom…so that people buy her shit, it’s her thing…it’s all she knows….and here are her tits…on Spring Break…where she’s doing solid thinking and planning to take her bullshit public…because it’s all her motherfuckers, at least that’s what she thinks, and really it may be true in terms of sales, like she’s the AVON lady of her own AVON…

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Jessica Alba is useless but she’s hot and she’s famous and she’s rich…and that’s what matters in this world…she’s also a budding entrepreneur who pretty much is the face of a business she’s never done any work on, other than showing up and showing up and now it is worth a billion fucking dollars…and that’s a proper execution of TITS getting hits..and here are those tits in Cosmo…

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If you focus on the first 5 seconds of this video, you can imagine that Jessica Alba is dead, we call it DEADFACE – which is conveniently the only way you’ll every get your dick close to her and the chances of you working the morgue her corpse will be at is slim to none…so take it in necrophiliacs, this marketing puppet and her dead face, half open mouth is all you need for what I assume is one of your more normal fantasies in your life filled with weirdness…

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

Jessica Alba must be taking her company public very fucking soon….she’s all over the fucking place in a bunch of photoshoots, this time Vogue, like she’s some kind of model or fashion icon, when really she’s just rich and has a good PR team….strategically making her do exactly what she does…and that’s act, while being directed, because going public is a huge scam and the people behind Wall Street and finance know exactly how to inflate the value of a nonsense company, so that they can all get rich as fuck…

So get ALba in media, dressed up, looking good, talking about life as a bullshit exec…good for everyone, except future shareholders of this nonsense….but who cares about them…

A whore is a whore no matter what she’s whoring, she’s got a basic knowledge of how to whore, whether it’s an IPO, or to get a movie role, or Coconut water, she’s got this…ALba’s got this…

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Jessica Alba is bullshit…and these pants are probably bullshit too…only because I assume they are jacked up with spandex to shape her this way…but more importantly to squeeze her mom pussy into place so that it doesn’t look like the horror scene it probably is…

Jessica Alba is bullshit, because she’s an actress, a really fucking bad actress who got eaten up by the industry, they loved her and cast her as the hot chick in all kinds of garbage money making movies, who’s latest role is playing a CEO or figurehead I call “Use her celebrity to sell organic products that aren’t organic…her female fans will buy into it and we’ll all be billionaires.”

I like using her fame whoring to remind me of what she’s actually all about.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

TO SEE HER IN GOOD HOUSEKEEPING LIE CLICK HERE

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Jessica Alba has figured out how to connect with her audience using social media…kinda like how she figured out how to lock down her now husband by getting pregnant…in a they broke up, but she got knocked up, so he had to man up situation that I guess worked out for them, even if they sleep in separate beds, since these hollywood types fucking love and worship money, and they turned their marriage, her being a mom situation, and her celebrity despite having little to no talent…to a product line that is apparently worht a billion dollars…and that she owns 20 percent of…

She’s doing it with candid bikini pics…that she appropriately titled “Thirsty”…because she’s ironic and clearly not a fucking idiot…

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Jessica Alba posted this bikini picture on her snapchat…because she’s an executive who runs a billion dollar company….and figure she might as well go tits first for her fans that aren’t mom’s buying fake organic product, but rather dudes who still jerk off to her from when she was a big, uncelebrated but well paid movie star…where she played the hot girl…because despite being a Mexican…she was a hot girl…and I guess still is, 2 kids in, doing anything she can to get in the media, even low level titty flashes, because i guess it’s good for business..and sells more stupid product in what is crunch time for all businesses..especially ones heavily dependant on this bitch’s celebrity….a celebrity they just had to give 20% and a title to so that she felt like a real business woman in those meetings, while we all know the business is obviously carried by other people…because ALba’s too busy doing yoga, being a mom, and posting tit pics.

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All to sell bullshit “organic” product….by doing this press tour…to remind you that she exists…looks like she’s reading a script to make you like her better than you already do…because she’s taking this shit public…and she needs all the support she can as the above average looking girl who was cast as the hot girl in low quality movies….that she never got naked in…because unlike Miley, she understood, the less you show…the more we want..

The most interesting revelation in this is that she was a child prostitute for clown fetishists….because at 11…she was hired to be a clown….for 20 dollars…because that’s life of a Mexican…

Boring – Here are the pics…

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Jessica Alba gave a pretty solid upskirt…that unfortunately wasn’t very solid at all…because there were no stains…there were no holes…they didn’t look filthy…or like they smelled strong enough for me to shove in my mouth as I jerk off…the panties weren’t sheer…there was no exposed clit or lip..we couldn’t determine whether her vagina was an inny or an outty…that I assume is mangled…thanks to the kids…but I guess the bigger tragedy in Jessica Alba’s costume, is Jessica Alba…she’s so played out…

I guess another tragedy is how shitty this costume is, she’s running a billion dollar company, she could spend 10k on a costume, you know with her movie make-up colleagues from the shit movies she was in…and do something mind blowing…but instead she does this lazy shit..unacceptable…she has a team…a fucking team…

Not to mention, that her underwear is actually just white workout shorts, which as a concept is hot because after an hour of sweating…you see everything vagina…something I love…all covered in filth that smell strong enough for me to shove in my mouth as I jerk off…but that in this case…are a protective short, in case she flashes her panties to the world, she’ll be covered up…something conservative girls have always done when they want to be slutty…the same girl who wears a long shirt with leggings so you can’t see her ass..even if it’s a good ass…it’s just fucking frustrating for those of us who love pussy upskirt flashes…lame as fuck…

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When Jessica Alba isn’t being a mom of two, or a wife to the guy she anchored with a baby, but not like an anchor baby to get citizenship, like the mexican that she is…but more a grappling hook that she jabbed in his back after he was done fucking her and her crazy celebrity needy demanding antics….forcing him to be a good guy….a good guy who figured if he has to put up with her nonsense, he might as well make money off it…so he threw her into a tech start-up product line…”Pretend to be natural and organic, people will love it”….even if it’s made in sweatshops or factories that make other garbage that kills people slowly with cancer….”it makes a good story and people will buy”….and buy they did…making the brand a billion dollar brand….all while allowing Alba, to pay CEO…I mean when she’s not on set doing shoots to promote brands that aren’t hers for money…or media to keep promoting the brand she’ll become a billionaire with…as they are getting ready to go public they need a Media TOur…

And she’s thinking “Oh fun, this is just like when we toured for HONEY, that went so well”….

I guess what I’m saying is that she’s still hot, but I still hate her, and not just because she’s a Mexican like my mother was and I have mom issues, but because there’s just something about her that makes me wonder why her husband hasn’t Chris Browned her yet…

Here are pics from some shitty magazine that produce shitty pictures…over and over again with different bitches in front of the colorful backdrop…it makes it easier to photoshop them…

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