A woman…despite how useless she may be…or how irritating she may be…or how fun it is to laugh at her for failing in her attempt to have a legit career by refusing to be on a show that was bigger than the show that made her…only to come crawling back a few months before the shit was cancelled….is never useless as long as she owns a bikini…and someone gets a picture of it…

I will look at any bitch in a bikini, hot or not, just because I like seeing bitches in bikinis…it never gets dull to me…it just makes for scenery I can appreciate and enjoy…like what I’d imagine climbing up to the top of Everest feels like to some…with far less work…not that any of the bitches, including Kristin Cavallari deserved to be compared to climbing up everest, I mean, she’s really nothing great or interesting, I’m just saying I feel satisfied and complete spiritually when I’m looking at or around half naked women…even the uglies…

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

A valuable lesson I’ve learned in life is that tits are always useful…even if the bitch they are attached to is useless, annoying, talentless, a hack, a crackwhore, or dead…both career-wise and physically, just not too dead, cuz then tits just become gross, if you ask any necrophiliac he’ll tell you the soaking her in warm water doesn’t work forever…

I don’t know where I’m going with that, I guess Kristin Cavallari just makes me morbid, inspires me to think of graveyards, morgues, the final curtain and all that bullshit, cuz I can’t imagine her ever coming back and making anything of herself…It’s like Michael Jackson once said before he died….”this is it”…..cuz I feel quoting Michael Jackson always works cuz he just has so many words that represents what I’m thinking, “I’m Bad…Thriller”….what the fuck am I doing…oh right…staring at Kristin Cavallari’s unemployed but more importantly unemployable tits…that are gonna lose their shit eventually, craving that fame they once had doing bad fake reality shows….Wonder how this is gonna pan out….

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

What do you do when no one wants you and no one cares about you? At least not the people you want to have care for you, you know like people who can offer you a job that doesn’t involve you stripping. You wipe off those tears of failure, you need to be resiliant and get into a bikini tha you jack it up into your into your vagina, that is not nearly as useless as you, and you stage a photoshoot hoping people post about it, hoping it reminds people you are still here, hoping it will turn your bullshit MTV career around….even though the world has rejected you….

Also known as my favorite time in a has been reality TV star’s career.

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

I figured that when this bitch’s show got cancelled, she’d finally throw in the fucking towel and produce sex tapes…or pretty much anything semi-erotic.

For those of you who don’t know or care, she was the bitch from a show called Laguna Beach, it was the show that was chapter 1 of The Hills…it was what made this bitch a “Celebrity” and I use that world loosely, and she had the balls to refuse to continue on The Hills cuz she had an ego and decided she could make it as an actor, a legit actor…the crossover everyone in Reality has been able to make successfully….only to realize a few years later that she needed money and that no one took her seriously…and that she was the bitch on a show far less significant than the one she refused to be the star of….So she had to beg MTV to let her back on, only for the shit to get cancelled her first year back…making you think she’s either the Yoko Ono that ends a horrible thing…a hero to the world or maybe that she’s the useless twat capable of bringing down an already useless as fuck show cuz she’s just that useless…

But I see the good in everything, and I firmly believe there’s nothing useless about ANY girl…pretty much cuz she’s got the required holes to be a real talent and success in porn.

Leading to the conclusion, that she should turn to porn, cuz I think it’d be a place where she could really fucking shine…at least a place I’d like to watch her shine….with semen and vagina juice…cuz really they’re all fucking whores to me.

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

I feel like a loser posting pictures of a girl showing cleavage like it’s a big deal. I don’t care whether the girl in the picture is the most successful, most desirable, or most useless bitch around. I don’t care if she’s local or international, I just know writing about tits like they matter is some serious virgin loser shit that I am ashamed of.

That said, Kristin Cavallari got an invite to an event, something I doubt has been happening as much as her Laguna Beach stardom 5 years ago, and I just thought it was funny to see her maximizing her little tits as hard as she could to get some low level attention like this. It’s like if she tried to get more out of her tits than this, she woulda been walking around topless, and if she tried to squeeze more out of them, they would probably start to bleed….and I just like to encourage this because it often ends in sex tapes.

Fame is addictive and when it is gone, these idiots do all they fucking can.

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

Tyler Shields is some photographer out of LA who made friends with some celebs and models and has since been making a name for himself because they all think he’s this inspired artist or some shit. I’ve seen countless comments to the guy about how awesome he is and how he is a visionary and I guess I shouldn’t hate on him too hard, cuz I’ve never had patience to seduce women into getting naked, or in their underwear, I’ve never said the right things, I’ve never felt like I need to make them believers that they are part of something much bigger than they think they are, stripping them down, all to get HIM noticed.

I am not sure if you get what I am saying, but it’s pretty much that this dude says the right thing to the right people, he makes them think he’s this bigger than life artist and that they have to shoot with him, he’s out of LA, and there are many insecure actors out there willing for that shot at having some substance in their lives filled with crap….so they attach themselves to people like this, he gets them half naked, and we all find out about the motherfucker, visit his website and make him tons of money. Using their celebrity to make him a celebrity….

It’s a good scam, that I just don’t have patience for. But I will post the Kirstin Cavallari pictures, because she really has no point anymore, her one and only break has come and gone twice….and lightning doesn’t strike three times…but maybe getting Lohan’s photographer will put her back on the map. I am sure she’s so happy people are talking about her today…

Who really cares, she’s half naked in a park and that’s good enough for me, no matter who the bitch is, or how useless the bitch is….and really Tyler’s got the right idea…gag this bitch…but next time…don’t let her up for air. This is a lost opportunity if I’ve ever seen one…

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

Kristin Cavallari is in her underwear which means she’s doing her best to stay relevant now that her only gig has finally dried up…and she knows better than the rest just how hard the real world is cuz she actually tried to run out on her own once before….so stripping down in pictures while people still remember her is critical cuz otherwise she’ll end up stripping on stage for people to help pay her baby formula…but I have a feeling that’ll never happen since she probably has rich parents and that’s how she got on TV in the first place and really I have no idea why I bothered writing all this about some useless cunt who’s cunt I should have already seen in some boring pictures….when I coulda wrote about the young pregnant girl I saw earlier today, or even the security guard pushing 30 with a legit combover, or even about how I wish everyone posted pics of them having sex on twitter and facebook, but instead I did this…I am a disgrace…

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I think I am starting to appreciate Kristin Cavallari and her bottom feeding because now that the one thing that ever worked out for her is over and that MTV is done with her and her cunt friends…she’s gotta figure shit out and find her place in the world and by doing that she is showing off some tit and unfortunately, I am down with that….because I am dude and love when bitches know their roles in the world as sexual objects…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari

The Hills are over so now Kristin Cavallari is officially fucking useless. We already knew that, but now maybe she knows it…because she is the only star from Laguna Beach who refused to go onto the Hills because she actually was delusional enough to think that she had talent and potential to have a career without the MTV reality bullshit, only to weasel her way back onto The Hills the final season cuz she needed the money and those dreams of being independent of MTV were shattered…and she knew it was her only hope and now her only hope is over…so maybe she’ll be working at American Apparel instead of shopping their, but with a body like this, I’d rather she work the streets or the porn scene….and I guess at this point anything can happen….

Pics via Fame

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