The funny news of the day is that Perez Hilton was paid by Paris Hilton’s people to not talk shit about her. I think that’s called selling out, but that’s not really surprising considering this fucker was hated so much growing up that he was a gun short of a school shooting. instead he took the high road and through years of self-hatred ended up with a shitty site that everyone started reading, god fucking knows why, because it was pretty clear to me that motherfucker was too ugly to listen to, but on his quest for acceptance he took the first offer than came his way from a real life celebrity and that was to pay him to keep his mouth shut. He’s a fucking pussy, even though he doesn’t have one, he’s just rocking a man cunt that I am sure a whole lot of young big dicked fags have cum inside many times, while doing meth they bought with Hilton’s money.

Point of the story is that I’d probably take Paris’ money too, but only because I am poor but I’d still say she was a worthless washed up cunt subliminally. Censoring yourself for dollars is pretty fucking weak and since I hae no respect for motherfucker, I guess I couldn’t lose respect for him, but I did get to remind myself why I have no respect for him.

Either way here are some pictures of Paris Hilton that made their rounds yesterday, I guess it’s the only way her herpes ridden ass can stay in the public eye, because it seems like mainstream guys like big tits enough to ignore a busted, broken down haggared face with nothing to offer, but a weight gain, a muff gut and face that’s going to look like a fucking catcher’s mitt in a couple of years, cuz cocaine’s no substitute for Oil of Olay, not to mention her push up bra with rubber inserts to make her look like she isn’t as flat chested as her fat ass is.

I am nice, now go fuck yourself, if you’re a chick, do it on camera, I am a dirtbag and have no standards.

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The funny news of the day is that Perez Hilton was paid by Paris Hilton’s people to not talk shit about her. I think that’s called selling out, but that’s not really surprising considering this fucker was hated so much growing up that he was a gun short of a school shooting. instead he took the high road and through years of self-hatred ended up with a shitty site that everyone started reading, god fucking knows why, because it was pretty clear to me that motherfucker was too ugly to listen to, but on his quest for acceptance he took the first offer than came his way from a real life celebrity and that was to pay him to keep his mouth shut. He’s a fucking pussy, even though he doesn’t have one, he’s just rocking a man cunt that I am sure a whole lot of young big dicked fags have cum inside many times, while doing meth they bought with Hilton’s money.

Point of the story is that I’d probably take Paris’ money too, but only because I am poor but I’d still say she was a worthless washed up cunt subliminally. Censoring yourself for dollars is pretty fucking weak and since I hae no respect for motherfucker, I guess I couldn’t lose respect for him, but I did get to remind myself why I have no respect for him.

Either way here are some pictures of Paris Hilton that made their rounds yesterday, I guess it’s the only way her herpes ridden ass can stay in the public eye, because it seems like mainstream guys like big tits enough to ignore a busted, broken down haggared face with nothing to offer, but a weight gain, a muff gut and face that’s going to look like a fucking catcher’s mitt in a couple of years, cuz cocaine’s no substitute for Oil of Olay, not to mention her push up bra with rubber inserts to make her look like she isn’t as flat chested as her fat ass is.

I am nice, now go fuck yourself, if you’re a chick, do it on camera, I am a dirtbag and have no standards.

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I was talking to someone today about how the older this bitch gets the more she looks like a dude. She always had the feet the size of a basketball player and I never really bothered taking it as a sign, but now it’s hard to miss, especially when she’s got more bulge in her panties than I do when I wear women’s clothing. I don’t do it because I get off to it, I do it because times are tough and my wife got fat leaving all kinds of panties that are in my size, so being a practical person, I figured why the fuck bother buying new shit when we had perfectly good ones lying around, not to mention they make me feel pretty and a guy is allowed to feel pretty sometimes by my rules.

Either way, here’s a Paris upskirt to get you through your day. Cuddles.

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I read somewhere that Paris Hilton sues websites that say she has herpes. I want to get sued by Paris Hilton because it will give me something to do with myself, a purpose. So here are pictures of Paris and some punk she gave herpes. It’s apparently defamation of character to say that, even though we’ve all seen pictures of her Valtrex Herpes medication and her get fucked without a condom on.

I know for a fact that bitch has herpes, I used to have a text message relationship with Stavros and he pretty much implied it when he accidently wrote me saying “Where you at?” thinking I was someone else. That’s one of my arguments if bitch comes after me, my other argument is that dude’s a total frat boy cunt proven by he’s lame t-shirt and stupid hair, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to get sued by the stars because I am a fucking loser.

Bonus – Paris Hilton Modeling Her Own Tacky Piece of Shit Clothing Line. Her Hips are Lookin’ Like She’s Been Eating Too Much Ice Cream With Fat Dudes…and Hips Don’t Lie.

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I always knew Paris liked to surround herself with ugly fat bitches like Nicole Richie before the drug induced eating disorder and Kim Kardashian before the sex tape scandal that she staged to break free from being Paris’ fashion accessory or sidekick, all to make herself look prettier and skinner by comparison.

It looks like she’s replaced those whores with some fat motherfucker who should probably be eating lettuce and water and not ice cream even if it is trendy fat free shit, if he wants to live to see 40. The picture is kinda fucking trippy and makes me think that I am watching a cartoon, when in reality I am looking at a shitty picture on my computer screen.

It reminds me of the Get Along Gang or some Fat Albert shit but it also reminds me of the time I snuck into Universal Studios and ended up on a phone the size of a car. The tour guide took a picture of me and a couple of kids I was walking around with because I thought looking like I was with the kids was a little less suspect than being alone… Either way, it made me look like a midget so maybe Paris is putting some of her hard earned sex tape money to good use by surrounding herself with oversized things to maintain her dainty look without all the effort of cocaine, starving herself and working out.

I don’t fucking know what I am talking about, I am drunk but I do know that I want some ice cream right now, but can’t keep it in the house or my wife will eat it all in one sitting. She’s bigger than the dude Paris is with, I guess the biggest joke would be if this is what her sex life has come to..digging for buried penis making every time they fuck a pirate treasure hunt and this is survivor, which it probably would be cuz once the dick is found there’s all kinds of risks like the suffocation of him getting on top or the bio hazard that is Paris’ cunt…I am stopping this right now.

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Paris Hilton still has an ass that she feels the world needs to see because I guess the buzz around her has died down the last couple of weeks and the best way for her to draw attention to herself is to expose herself. I don’t have anything wrong with that strategy because you gotta do what you can to get noticed and she’s just better at it than I am. If showing my limp tiny penis meant getting some fucking money, I’d do it, but no one cares enough about me because my parent’s don’t own a hotel chain and I don’t have tits. I mean I do have tits, but not the kind of tits you want to see. I only realized I was insecure about being a fat slob recently. I was walking down the street with a slice of pizza and a milkshake and realized that everyone was thinking to themselves “no wonder he’s fat”, the reason I know that, is because whenever I see a fat guy with a bag of food from a fast food joint, that’s what I think to myself. I am like a black dude who hates on other black dudes because he doesn’t realize he’s fat. I may have man tits that are bigger than Paris new tits, but less full than when she rocks a Wonderbra, but I will still laugh at fat people with the best of them. That’s just the kind of hypocrite I am. Cuddles.

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Unsorted

Paris Hilton still has an ass that she feels the world needs to see because I guess the buzz around her has died down the last couple of weeks and the best way for her to draw attention to herself is to expose herself. I don’t have anything wrong with that strategy because you gotta do what you can to get noticed and she’s just better at it than I am. If showing my limp tiny penis meant getting some fucking money, I’d do it, but no one cares enough about me because my parent’s don’t own a hotel chain and I don’t have tits. I mean I do have tits, but not the kind of tits you want to see. I only realized I was insecure about being a fat slob recently. I was walking down the street with a slice of pizza and a milkshake and realized that everyone was thinking to themselves “no wonder he’s fat”, the reason I know that, is because whenever I see a fat guy with a bag of food from a fast food joint, that’s what I think to myself. I am like a black dude who hates on other black dudes because he doesn’t realize he’s fat. I may have man tits that are bigger than Paris new tits, but less full than when she rocks a Wonderbra, but I will still laugh at fat people with the best of them. That’s just the kind of hypocrite I am. Cuddles.

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