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Archive for the Photoshop Category

2010

04

May

Madonna Doesn’t Look Like Madonna in Interview of the Day

Here’s a jacked up Madonna who doesn’t even look like Madonna because they’ve edited her face into something almost worth fucking…this is so photoshopped that they should have just hired another model to stand in and call her Madonna, and maybe that’s what they did because I don’t see any rippling muscles or haggard face and really…if I was Madonna in all her disgusting glory…I would probably do the fucking same cuz who wants to deal with the truth of how you actually look….in a hide the mirrors in your house and only let trained photographers with high powered computer skills take pictures for you…cuz that way you can play make-belief since you don’t ever have to look at yourself…good fucking deal….

So if jerking off to Madonna is a childhood memory, this could be your last chance to revisit those years, unless you use youtube or the internet from screencaps from that movie she did called “SEX”….

Posted in:Interview Magazine|Madonna|Photoshop

2009

13

Oct

Marisa Miller Photoshopped Tits for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

Marisa Miller got in a bikini and heavily photoshopped for a recent Victoria’s Secret catalog. I am not trying to say that she’s not hot, or not worth fucking, or that she’s some kind of hag, but she is pushing 40 and does have a lot of sun damage and despite having an amazing fit body and me never letting a bitch’s sun damage, rough skin, stop me, seriously, I’ve cum on Aids lesions before, proving that I’m not that picky, but she just doesn’t do it for me, and I guess it’s because I know her tits are fake and I hate fake tit false marketing bullshit enough to discount a perfectly perfect girl because of them.

But here are the pictures.

Posted in:Marisa Miller|Photoshop|Tits

2009

26

Mar

Kim Kardashian and the Photoshop Scandal of the Day


The people at Complex are my fucking family. Sure Marc Ecko doesn’t send me birthday gifts, doesn’t invite me down to play basketball in his office, doesn’t send me his cover girls or clothing models to have sex with, but his staff have always been good to me and even featured me in the magazine and have consistently kept the friendship alive and that means a lot to me.

That said, they fucked up yesterday by posting an unphotoshopped picture of Kim Kardashian, maybe it was a publicity stunt that worked, since shit hit Perez Hilton, Gawker and all these other huge websites, and it even got back to Kim Kardashian who wrote this:

everyone has been putting up these pics from Complex Magazine showing the comparison of the original un-photoshopped photo that mistakenly was put up on complex.com.

Complex later replaced the pic with the photoshopped version, causing all of this drama.

But you know what, who cares! ??

So what: I have a little cellulite. What curvy girl doesn’t!? ??

How many people do you think are photoshopped? It happens all the time!? ?…

I’m proud of my body and my curves and this picture coming out is probably helpful for everyone to see that just because I am on the cover of a magazine doesn’t mean I’m perfect.”

Which is code for “I eat too much” and “I am lazy” but “Black people want to fuck me…”..

Either way, the thing that pisses me off is that 5 months ago, I found some photoshop dude who worked professionally for companies retouching pictures and his work on Kim Kardashian was part of his portfolio, shit took so much hard work that this expert felt it was his priced piece of work and I posted the shit, but no one noticed…

So I figure I’ll throw it out there again, because you can see just how fat this bitch I’ve been calling fat all these years is, and stop defending her, because she may be a cover girl, but she’s contributed nothing of value to society.


SEE MY OLD KIM KARDASHIAN PHOTOSHOP RETOUCHING POST
(cuz I am ahead of the game…and know how to spot a pig when I see one)

SEE KIM KARDASHIAN’S FAKE UNTOUCHED BIKINI PICS (cuz she’s full of shit and real fat)

Posted in:Kim Kardashian|Photoshop

2008

18

Nov

Kim Kardashian Is Fat and Photoshopped of the Day

There are a group of people out there who just don’t get it. They are mainstream, conventional and suburban. I came across one of those drones the other day and they were familiar with this site. They felt it was a great opportunity to tell me what I do isn’t legitimate, honest, honorable, or whatever other word they used, because I stopped listening. They asked me if I’d rather have my daughter marry a doctor, lawyer or accountant and I told him I didn’t have a daughter, but wouldn’t give a shit who she married just as long as she let me watch her give birth, because seeing a baby come out of a pussy, even my daughter’s pussy is like porn to me….

I was just trying to get the dude to fuck off, because I don’t really give a fuck what he thinks is legitimate, or whether he thinks what I write about is sleazy, useless drivel or porn, because it works for me. I get to sit on my ass all day, pretend I am busy, barely make enough money to pay for my server and if there is money left over, I can just drink more and not have to ask my wife to borrow shit, making her think I am dependent on her, but still remain enough of a hurtbag to not take any responsibility for myself or the family by paying for rent, food or utilities, because I just tell my wife I am working towards something, even though I am pretending and every day, the site is closer to dying, whether it is because of paparazzi agency lawsuits, FBI issued complaints from haters or not making the server fees cuz traffic is dying fast and companies don’t want to advertise…..or just my laziness….alcoholism or inability to make anything work….

But before I go, I decided I needed a purpose, something substantial, to really have next to my name in Wikipedia even though I tried to create a Wikipedia page about myself and shit got deleted, even though Perez Hilton and every other site have a Wikipedia page. I figured if I was the guy who outted something, or broke some story or even invented something, or brought something to light, then I would be legitimate, and not some hack with a really shitty computer. So that something I chose is to prove that Kim Kardashian is fat.

Now, I know it shouldn’t take that much work because shit is fucking obvious, so obvious my retarded neighbor who has the brain capacity of a 9 year old knows she’s fat, so it should be easy and easy works for me. I mean every girl I’ve ever bagged has been easy, every challenge I’ve put myself against has been easy, except for the time I wanted to walk 2 miles up hill because I didn’t have money for a bus and thougth I was going to die, but other than that, the only challenging thing I do is not drink myself to death.

So, I made the right choice in topic of study, because I don’t have much of an attention span, but I do know that every time I call this whore a pig, or fat, or disgusting, or claim she needs to work out, or get her stomach stapled like she was DJ AM or Roseanne, or Carnie Wilson, I get at least 3 emails, which is alot of me, telling me that the girls I like look like little boys, that Kim’s got some meat in all the right places and that she’s the hottest thing ever, and I just write back telling them that she’s just a product of photoshop, smoke and mirrors and you’re all getting fucked by the media.

She’s no natural beauty, she’s busted even with the plastic surgery she’s had and beyond her looks, she’s got nothing to offer the world, but leeching behavior that pretty much mocks the human race every day. There’s nothing hot about her, and the truth is that she’s overweight and in my new calling/ life work, in hopes to legitimize myself for Jewish judgemental, suburbanites trying to make their mom’s proud, who I really don’t care about, but the story fit into this post because it did happen yesterday, I came across a photoshop retouching company and guess who their portfolio guinea pig is Kardashian, probably because anyone who has seen a raw photo of her, know the work of a master needs to come in to make it worth lookin’ at…..and I ripped off their pics to prove my point that this bitch is a fucking cow, so stop emailing me about how she isn’t.

Picture 1 –

Before

After

Picture 2 –

Before

After

Picture 3 –

Before

After

Posted in:Fat|Kim Kardashian|Photoshop