Salma Hayek is being brave. If I’ve learned anything from watching the Golden Girls over and over again over the last 20 years….it’s that an old girl should never look at herself in the mirror looking down…gravity does some shit and it reveals everything they are trying to hide like how old they are…so always fuck on your back on on all fours…being on top is the TRUTH serum you want to avoid…UNLESS you’re jacked up with face fillers and BOTOX like all the celebs are.

This is a celebration of Salma’s hair, with some gratuitous tits, thanks to her being from the “Old School” when being a celebrity was at the closest it ever was to being a sex worker…use the tits, cocktease the right people, fuck the right people, get a career….whether you’re rich or not…it was manipulate the weak little bitch producer who could never get laid before being rich…get work…and matter.

Now she’s married to a billionaire, so she’s just doing this to keep up her legacy…to keep it all up and running…her husband being a rich dude is for sure a cuck….they all are and having dudes jerking off to her like she wasn’t 50…and she’s doing it with the tits.

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Salma Hayek is a pretty fascinating set of tits because despite being married to a billionaire and living that billionaire life, and despite having a lucrative career in Hollywood of her own, thanks to her tits, and I guess the fact that she was likely rich as most of the big titty Tijuana girls are working the Donkey Shows, not the TV shows, so it is safe to assume that this Mexican comes from privilege because you don’t need to be a white person to experience privilege…despite what the activists of the internet tell you…any ethnicity or culture can be privileged…as long as they are rich…anyway the rich girl from Mexico, turned Rich and Famous girl in the USA, turned Billionaire wife she still uses her tits for attention and that’s awesome….

Then again, it’s very possible that her husband is behind this, because rich dudes are fucking weird, with all their weird fetishes, and having his wife reduce herself to just being a set of tits for a magazine is what he gets off to. People are cucks, people like to see their wives fucked by big black cock unprotected in hotel rooms while they jerk off, and those aren’t even rich people….those are just average perverts into making a whore out of their wife cuz they find it hot….so maybe this is his version of that….

Or maybe she’s just reminiscing now that she’s made it on all fronts of the times she would show up to castings with her wonderful tits, when she was just a set of tits on a small Mexican frame who spoke broken english, which could just be an act….when they would look at her and say “I think these tits will be good in so many movies, let’s make it happen”….you know some Nostalgia since she’s old as shit…but doesn’t matter…they are still carrying her figuratively….as she carries them…literally…and this shit is a nice and sleazy use of the…even if it’s for fashion….

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Salma Hayek’s husbands family just bought Tiffany & Co for 16 billion dollars and this is a celebration of her divorce settlement provided she ever leaves him….

No wait, I googled it, her husband’s family owns another LUXURY BRAND EMPIRE FROM FRANCE worth billions, but not the one that bought Tiffany & Co, but let’s assume that they probably bid on it and lost out to LVMH, so they sent the daughter-in-law / Trophy Wife the empire was able to import from MEXICO for the son of the empire….to post this shot of what could be her asshole if only that dumb dress she’s in was pulled over to the side the way the Hollywood producers used to position her panties back when they were casting her in their movies for her tits…and to prove that they weren’t racist…cuz she was lurking around thanks to being rich in Mexico and able to buy her way into America instead of digging a tunnel or climbing a fence / wall or buying a plane ticket and not ever leaving until the agencies finally sign you for your tits and get you that work visa…NOT THAT IT MATTERS….

What matters is that Selma Hayek despite being old is still slutty, despite being rich as fuck on her own, and even richer as fuck through marriage….she does it for the love of being jerked off to…it is just the wrong kind of slutty, since this isn’t her tits.

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Salma Hayek is old but so am I, so with that I can still point and laugh at discriminate, but at the same time I can still appreciate a set of monster tits.

You see, when I was a young pervert, I would think that life after 30 made a girl obsolete, dead like her sex appeal, and back then…it was long ago…life expectancy was only 40 so I wasn’t that far off from the truth…but as things have evolved….more and more women have been taking care of themselves and by the age of 20 I realized there can be 50 year olds, even 60 year olds I would fuck cuz they still look good. It was few and far between, as most women just got lazy and gave up…but it happened…and now with social media, all these people are forced to stay fit and looking good, their feeds rely on it, so so many more 40 – 60 year old women are poppping up that are worth a fuck…even if as a concept it’s disgusting….

So…what I am saying Salma Hayek….felt old even when she was younger than me starting up at this…I’ve just always viewed her as a hot older lady…and that’s not just my Mexican pride, seeing as I am half Mexican… I just support all she does like the sturdy bikini top she’s wearing cuz her monster tits are still monster tits…and I will forever love them for that.

Here are her tits boucnin

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Salma Hayek reminds us that there’s something magical about tits, or women, or tits and women, or maybe it’s women with tits, and that is that they can turn everything into an erotic porno scene…even something as innocent as being tied up and busting out of a sports bra / tank top looking thing for social media…sure she’ll pretend she’s repelling on some nature adventure excursion, but we all know what’s actually going on here…a FETISH…

Her caption is that she’s got another Action movie still in her, but I think what she means is that she posted this for you to imagine yourself being in her.

Perverts…we’re all fucking perverts….even those of you looking at the blue helmet thinking that she looks like a giant dick head…while the rest of us are looking at the tits.

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Salma Hayek may be old, washed up, boring….because she’s rich and has made it in America as a Mexican import who barely speaks english, unless that’s just part of her act, you know to get all the Mexican roles…she’s probably from New Jersey and this is all lies where she milks being a Mexican you want to milk, and wish was illegally working in your house cleaning and taking care of your kids for a dollar a day – so that you can Arnold Schwarzenegger her – but realize it’s a fantasy – because she’s not an illegal…and more importantly…because you don’t have a dollar a day to pay her if she was…sadness…

But she’s still Salma Hayek…and that’s all I have to say about that..

Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

Salma Hayek may be old, washed up, boring….because she’s rich and has made it in America as a Mexican import who barely speaks english, unless that’s just part of her act, where she milks being a Mexican you want to milk, and wish was illegally working in your house cleaning and taking care of your kids for a dollar a day – so that you can Arnold Schwarzenegger her – but realize it’s a fantasy – because she’s not an illegal…and more importantly…because you don’t have a dollar a day to pay her if she was…sadness…

I guess she’s in some midlife crisis, or pulling out the old content she shot and never used, for GQ Mexico…in her second media blitz for Mexico in a day, maybe she’s running for President there…or maybe she’s got a new movie…or maybe she’s calling favors to get the attention she SEEKS…who knows…but good fucking job…reminding us why you exist…THEM TITS. Solid…yet so soft and juicy…like a ripe Mexican Avacado i want to stick my dick in….and fuck…because I am that dude you can’t leave rotting fruit around…I’ll just fuck it.

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Salma Hayek is on the cover of GQ Mexico because she’s their biggest breasted star that has penetrated American mainstream movies while we can assume American mainstream movies or the people who have made them, because how else does a poor Mexican make it in America…

Maybe it has to do with great tits, or maybe it has to do with Mexico being awesome, where there are rich people, an celebrities of their own, while America is something like 45 percent Mexican who like their Mexican people in their new country to feel connected with the old country…

I think it’s just fascinating that tits can make a woman still matter so many years after first introducing them to us….it’s some Day of the Dead shit and she’s like a zombie…never dead…even when she’s supposed to be…

Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

When I look at these pics of Old Timer…Salma Hayek, who is looking her age, but who still has big tits, because that’s what happens with tits as they get older, they get biggers, sloppier, and ironically enough, less fun to play with…I don’t get excited about Salma Hayek, there are so many younger hotter girls than her, I’m not nostalgic about tits or about Sofia Vergara before she was Sofia Vergara….

I think about the aspiring actor who got cast to play the sausage. What’s going on with his life, where’s he going after this, who does he live with…does he find this fun and awesome…his brush with celebrity…is this why he moved to LA in the first place…or is he a refugee you see on the side of the rode in Statue of Liberty costumes hustling tax returns…

Its about the sausge not the lettuce being used to symbolize tits…

The other thing I think about is how much I hate Seth Rogan and Judd Apatow and their garbage, low hanging fruit that works…comedy…

The worst…

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