Here’s the news…and it turs out that it is as genius as you’d expect it to be….every story delicately chosen to express the stupidity that is people….

Pharmacy Refused to Sell Plan B to Man
John Melbourne of Texas attempted to buy the emergency contraception known as Plan B in November, but the pharmacy technician at a Mesquite, Texas refused to sell it to him because he was a man. According to the Federal Drug Administration’s guidelines emergency contraception is available to anyone over the age of 17 – male or female – without a prescription.

Jail Employee Busted For Sex With Inmate
A Chula Vista, California jail employee was arrested for consensual sex with a federal inmate.

TN Man Drops Bag Of Meth When Buying Sudafed, Leeds To His Arrest
A man and his three friends were arrested Wednesday after he was denied Sudafed at a CVS. The store manager also found a bag of meth left in the area of the store where the suspect had been. 37-year-old Michael Koger was denied Sudafed at the CVS pharmacy.

Police: Man tortured girlfriend for 6 days
Police say they are seeking a dangerous man who tortured a 31-year-old woman and her 6-year-old daughter for six days inside a Tampa home.

Florida Man Attacks Cop While Wearing Darth Vader Mask
A drunk man dressed as Darth Vader in Florida went wild when a police officer asked him to move because he was lying in the middle of the street.

Man Claims He’s the Devil & God, Created White People
A driver who led police on a pursuit in Arizona and crashed into two squad cars has been arrested on multiple counts. Police said that as Abeita was being pulled from his car, the suspect “made comments to officers that he was the devil, he was God, and that he created white people and white people were messing up his land.”

90-Year-Old Survives Shootout With Burglar
A 90-Year-Old former sheriff from Northern California survived a home invasion and shoot out.

Video: Massachusetts clerk pistol-whipped
LAWRENCE – A store clerk was pistol-whipped in Lawrence. Police are hoping surveillance footage can help them find the attacker.

Posted in:stepNEWS

The stepNEWS is the best part of the day for me because news is hilarious….

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Colorado Woman Punches, Urinates Near $30M Painting
A Colorado woman was arrested after pulling down her pants and punching a $30 million painting — before urinating against it. Carmen Tisch, 36, is accused of causing $10,000 worth of damage to the Clyfford Still oil-on-canvas last week at a Denver museum dedicated to the late abstract artist.

Caught on Tape: Man Attacks Cop After Traffic Stop
An officer in East Baltimore was attacked in the aftermath of a traffic stop.

Boy, 15, Arrested For Drunk Driving in Michigan
Arrests for drunk driving are down nationwide, but in Troy, the arrest of one driver is making headlines. That’s because the driver is only 15 years old, and he was picked up behind the wheel at 2:45 in the morning.

Thief Returns Christmas Presents
A man caught on camera stealing a family’s Christmas presents returned what he stole

Massachusetts mom asks police to arrest bickering kids
SALEM – A Massachusetts woman fed up with her bickering children called police and asked responding officers to arrest two of them.

Video: Mummers Brawl Caught On Tape
The annual festivities in Philadelphia’s Mummers Parade on New Year’s Day turned violent, after people brawled during the annual event.

Dad: High Teens Destroyed Family Cars
A father in New Jersey says teens who might have been high on a legal drug, Sonic Boom, destroyed two cars that were Christmas presents for his two daughters.

Video: Flyers Fans Attack Rangers Fans After Winter Classic
It’s another black eye for Philadelphia sports fans as three men in Flyers jerseys beat two Rangers fans in front of a Philly cheesesteak landmark.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Here’s some news for you unappreciative half retarded cocksuckers who drain my soul and bring it to a dark place that may get me on local news for doing some kind of crazy…

NC Man Tries To Pass Off $1 Million Bill
A North Carolina man tried to pass off an obviously fake $1,000,000 bill at a Wal-Mart.

Woman Hit with Blow Dart Shot from Car
A Michigan woman was surprised when she was stuck from a needle shot out of a passing car.

PA Teacher Arrested For Sending Nude Photos To Students

Police Scare Girl Because Of Overdue Library Books
A Massachusetts girl was startled when police showed up to their house to collect overdue library books.

Southwest Philadelphia Vandals Caught On Camera
A video posted shows vandals spray painting a stop sign and cars in southwest Philly and bragging about it.

Man Wrapped in Bandages Robs Pharmacy
Police are searching for a man who robbed a pharmacy on Christmas Eve disguised in bandages.

Gun aimed at clerk’s head jams
The Orange County Sheriff’s Office is looking for robbery suspects who held guns to the head of a clerk. Deputies say one of the suspects pulled the trigger but the gun did not fire.

Video: Robbers drag woman outside store
A woman held onto her purse for nearly 40 feet Friday morning, as robbers tried to snatch it in the parking lot of a Sweetbay grocery store. Two men are now in custody.

911 Dispatcher Gives Shooting Advice To Mother
A recently widowed mother in Oklahoma calls 911 when intruders invade her home — a dispatcher tells her to wait until the men are actually in the house, then shoot, so that it would be considered self defense.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Here’s some stepNEWS…I figure more and more craziness is going to hit because just hanging outside the Holiday Inn here was on another level of insane in my small town…I’m talking crazy drunk kids fighting, girls in miniskirts going nuts and police arresting…and there’s a whole weird world of people out there…but this is what I’ve got so far….

Coach’s Kid Upstages Dad with Nose Pick
When University of Houston coach Tony Levine went before reporters to talk about his team’s win over Penn State in the TicketCity Bowl on Monday, he never dreamed he’d be upstaged by his adorable daughter Willa.

Teen: Shot over Air Jordan Sneakers
A teenager says he was shot over Air Jordan sneakers in Redford, Michigan.

Mummer Brawl In South Philly
Philadelphia police are looking at a video of Mummers brawling in South Philadelphia.The fight happened near the corner of 2nd and Pierce streets on Monday night, after the parade.

New Years Partygoers In Denver Locked Out Of Hotel Rooms
Due to a keycard issue at a Denver Marriott were locked out of their rooms

Philadelphia Parking Authority Tickets Transplant Patient Who Fed Meter
The PPA strikes again after a kidney transplant patient gets a ticket after he paid a parking meter in full.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Here’s some shit going on in the news…cuz the night before the New Year….that’s exactly what’s on your mind and little sluts…in mini skirts everywhere…drunk and horney aren’t distracting you from that want….you fucking loser….

FL Student Suspended For Wishing Bad Karma On Facebook
Allie Scott, a Florida teenager was suspended from school for a Facebook post wishing bad karma on another student.
http://www.redlasso.com/local/is-karma-facebook-post-a-crime/

Woman Uses Facebook For Kidnapping Rescue
A South Jersey woman was at risk of being forced to perform acts of prostitution to pay off a debt, but used Facebook to get help from authorities.

Man Tries To Steal Cash Register, Runs Into A Problem

Headstone falls on girl at cemetery
A 7-year-old girl has suffered serious injuries, including a broken femur and an open wound on the shoulder, after a large headstone fell on top of her at a Lowell cemetery.

Police: Slain Women Linked by Craigslist Ads
Three of four women recently found dead in Detroit car trunks had promoted themselves as escorts through the same website, police said Monday.

Posted in:stepNEWS

The stepNEWS is amazing….especially around the holidays…it really gives perspective on all things Christmas….

Canadian Tourists Find Severed Leg In Florida
A group of Canadian tourists made a gruesome discovery outside the home they were renting for the holidays: A severed human leg had washed ashore.

Mothers Hold ‘Feed-In’ At Target Store
Some mothers in Pittsburgh staged a “nurse-in” at a local Target store after a woman in Texas was asked to move to a fitting room because she was breastfeeding her baby in the store.

Mom and son suing Orlando Walmart Over Assault
An Orlando man and his mother are suing retail giant Walmart. Justin Ohle and his mother Paula say this all stems from a disagreement over a television.

Cops look for serial flasher in Boston
Police are looking for a man they say exposed himself to passengers riding on the Blue Line and Red Line on Christmas Eve.

Colorado Man Goes On Car Crashing Rampage
A Colorado man was set off and started ramming parked cars and attempting to run over strangers.

Incredible Dashcam Video Of Stolen Police Car
A Michigan man took off in a police cruiser while he was being placed under arrest for operating a meth lab in a hotel.

Boston is America’s ‘Drunkest City’
Boston ranks first out of 25 cities when it comes to not knowing when to close the bar tab.

Crocodile Attacks Lawn Mower
An Australian crocodile attempted to devour a lawn mower at a park

Jilted Arizona Wife Runs Over Estranged Husband
Mesa police say a woman ran over her estranged husband with her Jeep because he was cheating on her.

AZ Mother Arrested For Holding Kids At Knifepoint On Christmas Eve
A valley mother is under arrest, accused of holding her two children at knife point — and it allegedly happened on Christmas day.

Drive-Thru Robbery Doesn’t Go As Planned
A pair of masked men is suspected in an attempted robbery that occurred Monday night at a Dunkin Donuts in Whitfield; however, instead of barging inside and demanding money from the cash register these men opted to use the drive-thru lane.

Canadian Shoppers Pepper Sprayed At Boxing Day Sale

Drake and Lil Wayne Rumors Spark Brawl At Mall Of America
Cell phone videos captured the melee at the Mall of America on Monday, but police say they still aren’t sure what sparked the massive melee that was followed by a series of scuffles.

Cops: Christmas Shooter Wore Santa Suit
A man who killed himself and six relatives in Grapevine on Christmas Day wore a Santa suit during the shooting spree, police said.

VIDEO: Clerk Knocks Out Would-Be Robber
An armed robber who tried to hold up a business in South Carolina was knocked out by a store clerk.

Philly Dad Dead After Days In Recliner
A 9-1-1 call for a Philadelphia woman with stomach pains turned odd when paramedics were asked to take away a dad who had died two days ago in his lounge chair.

Video: Occupy Nashville Protesters Fight
This is supposed to be the season that brings people together, but in Occupy Nashville, tensions are tearing some people apart.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Some News I Forgot to Post Yesterday….Not very Christmassy but then again what really is….Santa’s a pervert, the elves don’t exist and the one at the mall are just exploiting themselves so they don’t have to get into midget porn, everyone hates their families they are buying gifts for, everyone prefers buying themselves drinks, the Christmas movies are shit and that’s why we drink….

Teacher Arrested For Biting Female Student
A scuffle at a school, near Albany New York, ended when a 5th grade teacher stepped in to bite a student. The teacher was arrested.

NY UPS Driver Caught Giving The Finger
Delivery drivers have gotten a bad rap this month. A UPS driver is caught giving a family’s security camera the middle finger, before throwing their package on the ground.

Fight Breaks Out at HS Basketball Game
A big fight broke out at a high school basketball game in northwest Baltimore Wednesday night. Last night’s game was a match up between DC’s Cardozo High School and Baltimore’s ConneXions Academy.

Hookah Santa Causes Controversy
A tobacco store with a Santa smoking a hookah has some residents of the Pennsylvania town unhappy.

Race for New Air Jordans Turns Ugly
The quest for some limited edition sneakers took an ugly turn early Friday morning outside the Mall at Stonecrest in Lithonia.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Tis the fucking season for amazing news….

Strip Club Toy Drive Donation Controversy
A toy drive program at the Hustler Club in San Francisco has some uncomfortable

High Speed Chase In Florida Ends In Crash

Police Charge Suspect with Nativity Jesus Theft
Amanda Crelia, 25, of Spotsylvania was arrested and charged with grand larceny for her involvement in the theft of the Baby Jesus figure from the Central Park shopping center last week.

Brutal Bus Beating In Milwaukee
A fight between a 12-year-old and a 24-year-old ended with an arrest.

Bold Thief Has Interesting Reaction To Being Caught
A brazen thief had a bizarre reaction when a clothing shop clerk stopped him from trying to walk out with high end merchandise.

Family Kicked Off Plane For Having Too Many Kids
A North Carolina family was removed from their US Air flight for traveling with too many young children.

Florida Man Steals Date’s Car
A Florida man, Michael Pratt, is accused of stealing his date’s car

Posted in:stepNEWS

Here’s the fucking news…..I’m like Barbara Walters only I got a wetter pussy and perkier tits.. on my lap…I don’t actually have a pussy or tits…but it’d be funny if I was really a hot chick writing this site the last decade….would make jerking off to my writing less gay….you gay.

Teens trash stores, post video online
It appears the incidents occurred at stores in the Riverview area of Hillsborough County, but investigators say they haven’t gotten any reports from the businesses that were targeted.

Rats Eating Gifts At Post Office
All of the goodies being shipped into New York for the holiday season are providing some tasty treats for rats at one Manhattan post office.

VIDEO: Police Chase Ends in Crash
A police chase ended in a crash on Langford Parkway, Georgia Monday afternoon.

Coach Accused of Having Sex With Student
A former assistant track coach at LaGrange High School in Georgia is charged with having sex with a female student.

Teens Arrested After Recording Assault Of Homeless Man
A videotaped assault on a homeless man has led to criminal charges against a 20-year-old New Jersey man and a 17-year-old boy accused of filming the assault while egging the attacker on.

Fake Bomb Found in Michigan McDonald’s Bathroom
Police in Warren are trying to figure out who left a device that looks like a bomb inside a McDonald’s restaurant near 10 Mile and Hoover. The restaurant was evacuated as a result of the discovery.

Posted in:stepNEWS