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Archive for the stepNEWS Category

2011

16

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

The stepNEWS would be gay if it fucked news of the same gender. I don’t know what that means…but I know that shit’s not gay at all…it’s real life motherfuckers, embrace it….

Even though the real news that is making me laugh are these pictures from Vancouver’s Hockey Riot, I mean shit some of these looting fans are fucking idiots letting the press take pictures of them clearly breaking the law, it’s like motherfuckers should have just arrested themselves, which brings up a very important point, if you loot, wear a mask…

That said, here’s the rest of the stepNEWS to start your day at noon cuz you’re as lazy as me….

Man Files Lawsuit For Manicure Charge
A Maryland man who was charged $1 more for a manicure than women has filed a lawsuit for $200,000 claiming sex discrimination.

Spanx for men hit the market – How Humiliating…
Spanx is a $350 million business built on shapewear that makes you look slimmer. Now the woman behind this new girdle empire is targeting men.

Man Billed After Trapped in Elevator
Mahmoud Dweib and his 4-year-old son went to Methodist Hospital in the Medical Center to see his newborn son back in Aug. 6, 2010.

Man Cusses Out FOX 26 News Crew

Cap Metro Releases Video of Assault
On Wednesday Capital Metro released surveillance video of an assault on one of its drivers.

Weiner Stripper Speaks Out – Cuz Porn Bitches Need Publicity when it hits Too….
A former porn actress and stripper says New York Rep. Anthony Weiner asked her to lie about their online communications. Ginger Lee spoke at a news conference Wednesday in Manhattan with celebrity attorney Gloria Allred.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

14

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s some stepNEWS to keep your ignorant ass semi-cultured and socially aware, I mean if you consider a mall cop running a prostitution ring a cultural experience….which conveniently, I do….but not as much of a cultural experience as the teacher buying her student a sex toy…genius….

Mall Cop Arrested, Prostitution of Girl
A security guard at Westfield Wheaton Mall is accused of running a prostitution business. Police say Cooper Kweme admitted to walking around the mall trying to lure young women.

Child Abuser Founded Girls’ School
A Delaware charter school in danger of closing has found out its founder is a convicted child abuser.


Teacher Accused of Sex with Student
A Pasadena teacher is a wanted man after investigators say he had sex with a student at his home and in the classroom.

Man Ordered to Apologize on Twitter – This Scares me…
A judge orders a man to apologize online, for harsh words he used about a company.

Kids Caught Tossing Rocks Off Overpass
A high speed prank on the freeway could have ended in tragedy. Kids throwing rocks off an I-96 overpass messed with the wrong driver down below. Learn what the driver did that led to these bratty kids getting busted.

Police: Teacher Gave Student Sex Toy
A high school teacher faces charges for allegedly giving a student a “sex device” on school property and having inappropriate conversations with her, Montgomery County authorities say.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

10

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s the stepNEWS…..

Caught on Tape: Customer Traps Robbers, Gets Shot
A Good Samaritan spent the morning in the hospital after trying to stop robbers in their tracks.

Size Stops Woman from Boarding Flight
A Texas woman was prevented from boarding a Southwest Airlines flight because of her size. But she claims her weight has never been an issue before.

Priest steals money for porn addiction
A Haverhill priest will not serve jail time for stealing thousands of dollars from his church.

Mom gives 7-yr-old daughter enhancements
A British mom who is a self-confessed ‘plastic surgery addict’ is catching heat for the gift she gave her young daughter.

Dozens Arrested at Graduation Party
A high school graduation party ended with the arrest of 29 people in Alpharetta. The parents of the teen who threw the party were also charged with kidnapping for forcing partygoers to hide throughout the house.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

09

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

I think we should focus less on other people and more on ourselves. I mean who really cares about these stories the media has decided is important for us to see and know about. Let’s focus on the news in our lives instead…What’s new with you? OK. That was boring…now I get why we use TV to tune out real life…cuz real life sucks…except when we get to laugh at each other….so here’s the latest in stepNEWS…to start the day cuz I’m all Star Jones in this motherfucker….

On a sidenote, the funniest thing in local news is the anchors…its like where do they find these motherfuckers…weird.

Woman Awarded $250K in STD Cyber Bully Case – Dangerous for me cuz I’m a Cyber Bully….
A Westland woman says that a cyber bully was out to destroy her life, but now she’s getting some justice. How did the woman fight back? She took it to court and won. The jury took her side.

Cadaver Tissue Used in Nose Jobs – Disgusting.
One Houston-area plastic surgeon has developed a unique technique to solve tough cases and correct the mistakes of others.

Police called over bikini-clad zombies – Amazing
ENFIELD, Conn. – Right next to the quiet country road in the quintessential New England town of Enfield lies a secret so shocking it sparked a phone call to police.

Teen Dies after Huffing Dust Cleaner – Genius. Better off getting her highs sexting and fucking older dudes…too late for that idiot.
Friends and family members gathered in Sachse Wednesday night to remember a 17-year-old who died from “huffing.”

Texas Suspect Txt Msgs Deputy, Arrested – Genius
A suspected drug dealer accidentally turned himself in to authorities by text message.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

08

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’s the stepNEWS to start the day….Like a morning show with no audience….I bring it…

Maybe it’ll give you something to strike up conversation with the checkout clerk at the used bookstore you buy your comics at virgin…I mean assuming you leave your house…

Breastfeeding Allowed in Georgia Park and I Hope Someone’s Gonna Make a Site with all the Breast Feeding Videos…
Forrest Park, Georgia recently changed its public indecency ordinance to allow breastfeeding after mothers protested.

Caught on Tape: DC Metro Police Use Force in Arrest
Metro rider William Boykins was on the way home on May 21 when he saw Metro police with two suspects handcuffed and sitting on the platform. Boykins pulled out his iPhone and started recording

2 DC Cops Demoted After Sheen Escort
The Charlie Sheen D.C. Police escort controversy has now led to the demotions of two Metropolitan Police Department officers.

Caught on Tape: Atlanta Braves Pitcher Derek Lowe Arrest
Atlanta police have released video that shows officers interacting with Atlanta Braves’ pitcher Derek Lowe after his recent arrest for DUI.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

06

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

I turned myself off for the weekend. I didn’t read the paper while taking a shit in a public place. I didn’t watch the TVs at the local McDonald’s Cafe I get my free TV, internet and cheap coffee at. I didn’t go on a computer, or use Twitter, except maybe to lure one or two vagina pics…so I have no idea what’s going on in the world, locally or internationally. I’m so self involved and it’s amazing, my only concern is when I can take a fucking nap on a bench, or scrounge up enough money from my wife’s purse to afford me a daytime 40, that will lead to many amazing things, like even me possibly popping up on the news.

Here’s the today’s stepNEWS to catch up. The stuntman clip is retarded.

Sex offender busted for scam
SALEM – Police say a Level 2 Sex Offender went door-to-door scamming people out of donations they thought were going to a cancer charity.

Stuntman Hurt at Atlanta Motor Speedway
A metro Atlanta stuntman is recovering in the hospital after he was badly injured in stunt-gone-wrong at Atlanta Motor Speedway’s Thursday Thunder.

Man Killed Trying to Steal Medical Pot
A Phoenix man who recently was authorized to grow his own marijuana fatally shot a man who tried to steal his pot at gunpoint.

Duck Living at Home Depot
A duck in Maine has made a Home Depot his home for the past month and is refusing to leave.

Teens could go to prison over pic
Final exams started Friday at Hernando High School, but few students were talking about their tests. The buzz was about a text message — what some called “sexting.”

Teens arrested after fight
Police have arrested an 18-year-old in Winter Haven for his involvement in a fight shown on video, which was captured and uploaded online.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

03

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

Here’ latest stepNEWS to start your miserable day…no wait it is Friday and that makes your corporate life exciting, this is the afternoon you wait for, the best day of the week and it is finally here….you pathetic drone…..now let me distract you with stupid news…and send me money for my efforts…drone…

Accused Murderer Uses “Red Bull” Defense
Stephen Coffeen of Florida has admitted to killing his father. Prosecutors say he is insane and will not pursue a murder case against him.

Mother Caught; Accused in Rape of Boy
A Pasadena mother accused of raping her friend’s 12-year-old son almost a dozen times is now behind bars. Police arrested Brandi Fuller, 30, in Hitchcock after receiving a tip from Crime Stoppers. The focus now turns toward DNA; there is an allegation the young boy fathered one of Fuller’s six children.

Women Sue Jail Over Underwire Bra
Two adult women are suing Prince George’s County because of how they were treated while visiting a relative in the local jail. The women say their underwire bras kept setting off the metal detector and a guard told them, “Until you’re clear, you cannot come through here.”

Ex-wife Accused in Home Break-in, Fire
A teacher is accused of breaking into her ex-husbands Fort Bend County home, then starting a fire.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

01

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

The stepNEWS is a very very very very important collection f the days mose amazing news stories that didn’t make it on the national news, that cover such important issues as racism against white people, which I saw last night at the 2 dollar tuesday at KFC, Cops raping, even though all the cops I know just run drugs and hookers and can have you killed off and become a “missing persons”, as they know all the tricks, and people dressing up like nuns to rob a bank, when everyone knows nuns don’t exist anymore, it’s a dated concpet that is only really used as a fetish cuz we like the idea of 80 year old virgins…

The stepNEWS really hits close to home….

Racism Against White People
Do whites suffer more racism than blacks?

MBTA drivers fight, play chicken
CHELSEA – Two MBTA bus drivers are in hot water after engaging in a road rage incident with buses in Bellingham Square.

Former Southgate Cop Accused of Rape
A former Southgate police officer is facing some very serious charges. He’s accused of raping a woman after responding to a call for help at her house.

Pair dressed as nuns rob Chicago bank – HI
CHICAGO – Police were Monday searching for two suspects who robbed a Chicago bank dressed as nuns — in a scene eerily reminiscent of the Ben Affleck movie “The Town.”

Man attacks girlfriend with forklift
A Springfield man will face several charges after allegedly attacking his girlfriend with a forklift.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

31

May

stepNEWS of the Day

I don’t believe in the news….it is just propaganda.

But I do like the local news, mainly cuz I like know who grew the biggest zucchini in every town across America…but also because of all the idiots who go unnoticed cuz real news bumps their stories off the national news…

So that’s why I do this…and because the walmart upskirt guy is hysterical….

Man Charged for Wal-Mart Upskirt Videos
Edwin Bates secretly aimed a video camera up women’s skirts at a North Texas Wal-Mart, police say.

Thousands surround gang fight on Massachusetts beach
S. BOSTON – Authorities say law enforcement officials converged on Carson Beach in South Boston and broke up fights involving youths from rival gangs.

Five People Arrested for Dancing at Jefferson Memorial
A dance-in at the Jefferson Memorial led to five arrests and a violent clash with U.S. Park Police.

Porn Pics Found on ‘The Sims 3’ Website
There was shock for a Maryland Mom who thought she could protect her kids by supervising them online. Then she logged on the simulation computer gaming site “The Sims 3” and discovered dozens of pornographic images.

Lawsuit seeks $15K for rose thorn prick
A Lake Mary man is suing Winn-Dixie Stores and a flower importer for a finger prick caused by rose thorn.

Man Tells Police Parent’s Ashes in Car (surprising news for his parents)
Police say a Michigan man pulled over by police told them they could not search his car because the ashes of his dead parents were in the middle console.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

26

May

stepNEWS of the Day

The real news of the day is that I got stuck talking to a crazy 90 year old Christian trying to redeem herself of a life of sin by walking around handing out bullshit flyers about the end of the world, fascinated that all dogs came from one breed thanks to Noah, clearly in desperate need of the discovery channel and a solid fuck…

Here is the latest stepNEWs….

Woman attacked with wet swim noodle
A Florida man, apparently angry over a watermelon, is accused of attacking a woman with a swim noodle.

Breastfeeding Moms stage ‘nurse-in’ which is way less ghetto than the pregnant mom I just saw smoking in her locked car with her kids…
In Forest Park, Georgia, moms are mad. They staged a “nurse-in” to protest a new city ordinance forbidding mothers from breastfeeding children age 2 and older in public.

Posted in:stepNEWS