We are big DJ AM supporters. Not because he used to be fat, or because he can get us into all the hottest clubs, letting us brush arms with the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Tara Reid, but because he’s going to be inviting me to his wedding. AM is the main reason we always stay away from Nicole Richie pics, we have a lot of respect for her, not because of her past drug addiction, which is porno, or because she’s on TV, but because she makes us laugh, and that’s pretty rare. We don’t give a shit about her friend so we can say check out her tits, her shirt is almost see-through and bitch is wearing a bra. Who the fuck wears bras nowadays, if she’s hangin with Nicole she should know what’s up.

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When trying to recover from a break-up/ break-down (I believe they occur in tandem), you will try anything to distract yourself from the major buck shot wound to the heart. That gapping hole needs any filler it can get. My break-up led me to various distractions: pills, slutty sex, all nighters, pseudo yoga spiritualness, trashy break-up novels, online dating, I even picked up the cute guy with the curly hair in Kinkos Print shop. Tried getting back to the basics, the whole looking in and searching for answers bit, however, I haven’t been able to fill this massive blast to my heart. Until now………..I have just picked up “How to smash everyone to pieces� by Mike Segretto (Contemporary Press). And I am learning how to smash everyone to pieces! Including my goatfucker ex! Now you try.

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I haven’t seen this movie, but I may. I don’t really do the whole tv/movie thing. It costs too much money and I don’t own a TV. I have been a fan of Jamie King for awhile. She’s a classy slut, the kind you would want to bring home to your wife and proposition a threesome with. These are screen shots from Sin City, where she appears naked.I never said they were good quality, but in the event you haven’t noticed, quality is not something we look for.

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I like my women to be famous, to look good without make-up, to be the object of desire for perverts everywhere, and to smoke. Lohan is the star of this site, we are the home of Lohan and with that title comes both the good and the bad. Today’s post is bad.We have no cleavage, no nip slips, for lack of better words, Lohan looks disgusting….If I was banging Christian Slater, I would be smoking too.

Lindsay Lohan has had plenty of problems with her occasionally out-of-control dad, Michael – so you’d think she’d keep her distance from ill-behaved older men.

But word is that the 18-year-old starlet is dating 35-year-old actor Christian Slater.

A Lowdown spy reports that the bad boy has been spending quality time on the set of Lohan’s new movie, shooting in New York as “The Untitled Lindsay Lohan Lucky Project,” and has been spotted disappearing into Lohan’s private trailer.

Says the spy: “They’re definitely hooking up.”

Yesterday, Lohan’s rep told Lowdown, “As far as I know, he did not visit her in the trailer. He said hello to her, but I was told he was visiting the head of photography.”

OhNo

Another pic after the jump….

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Britney’s not looking so hot lately – so I decided to post this throwback where we can see a little bit of her nipple. This reminds us of the time before her big belly, barefoot bathroom romps and her major foot rash and nose-picking sessions. It doesn’t, however, remind us of a time before Kevin’s white trash dick was deep inside her babyhole, only because that shit is deeply embedded in our brains and no matter how hard we try – we are unable to forget….kinda like the memories of my uncle back in Mexico touching me in dirty places…however I remember than night like it was yesterday. Thanks Pablo, I got you for life.

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We have talked about Vida Guerra before and before that. She is a Mexican girl, like me, only I am not a girl, but I am sure you wish I was so you could fuck me – don’t you, pervert. Anyway, she went to some event, wore sheer lingerie – paraded around and that was the end of that. I am pretty sure that’s the extent of what she has to offer the entertainment world. The major question is what will she do when her ass goes to shit…..I remember when I had everything going for me. A hot body, an amazing drug and prostitution ring, money and pussy that was just crying for my loving….it all went to shit pretty quickly and I predict that for Vida.

More Pics After The Jump

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Dolls are made of plastic, they aren’t real people. But when you get lonely and lack the ability to maintain healthy relationships, you turn to your dolls. The world is a mean place, I understand that. You were teased, mis-treated and abused. You were laughed at for wearing the wrong things and having bad skin. The girl you always dreamt about never came your way. You are a loser in life but there is a solution. Get a sex doll, she won’t judge you, she won’t laugh at you, she won’t break your heart. She will always be there waiting for you to get home from work. She won’t have dinner on the table, but that’s a small trade-off for having something to live for…..

Today’s post is called “when did you first get into dolls?”:

Giverny,

I think I was 8 or 9 when I got a Barbie (I don’t remember how I got it). I thought she was beautiful, and dreamed of her coming to life and marrying her. But after a couple of days, an older brother found me playing with her, and degraded me for it (Men don’t play with dolls!). So I threw her away.

In my teen years, I saw adds for “lifelike” love dolls and fantasized about them.

I was almost 40 old before I bought a doll. And now I have Phoebe. And if someone finds me playing with her, they can go fuck themselves. I’m not giving her up.

Mahtek & Phoebe

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Nothing represents your existence. I don’t mean to be negative, but seriously look at yourself and ask “what have I done lately?” If your answer is nothing, than you can thank me later for helping you recognize your pathetic life. I don’t mean to be an asshole, I just say it how it is, and trust me your mom’s been wanting to tell you this for a longtime. Nothing is what this t-shirt represents. It’s a pretty easy guess as to wear I got this bitch from, so I won’t bother posting the link. Kisses….

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So we know that Lohan and Valderrama are still fucking. She was spotted going back to his hotel room after some event somewhere. If Lohan was throwing her pussy at you, I am sure you’d gracefully accept. Girls are crazy, they always run back to their ex’s, I don’t understand it at all. When it’s done – it should be done. You should be packing your Luis Vuiton bags and getting on the next bus to my cock…..

In more important news

LINDSAY LOHAN’S dad is at it again. While drying out in the Betty Ford Center, Michael Lohan decided to feed some birds that were on the grounds by attaching some cheese to a paper clip tied to a string. The birds loved the cheese so much it caused a tussle with the feathered friends getting into a not-so-friendly tug-o-war over it. It turns out the birds were a protected species and feeding them is a no-no. Wildlife authorities got wind of it and told the center they’d be slapped with a $20,000 fine the next time.

Source: Premiere Radio Networks

More Pics of Lohan after the jump

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We were happy to open our inbox and have these exclusive pictures of the newest MicroKitten.com model shoot. Her name is Maria and she is probably better looking than any girl you know. I know these Micro bikinis are all the rage and waxed bitches everywhere are rocking them like they are hot, and I know they are hot, because I look at the pictures and feel a warm sensation in my pants….but my newest stance is that the bikini wax is so last year. So people at MicroKitten.com, I am begging you to get these things on a lady with muff, cuz there ain’t nothing hotter….

Check out the pics – after the jump

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