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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

06

Apr

I am – Penelope or Monica Cruz Foot Fetish Pics of the Day

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The beauty of the internet is that you can look at a bitch shop and not get caught like if you were on the street doing it. I remember being a pervert before the internet where I’d hang under staircases lookin’ up hoping to see some panty, or sitting on the bench in a bikini store waiting to see girls try shit on and model it for me for free before getting kicked out. I even remember trying to peek around the curtains of the changing room hoping to see some nudity, I didn’t need the internet to make me realize all the opportunity there is as a peeping tom. But I did need the internet to allow me to do it without getting arrested.

The internet breeds perverts like you because it makes you live differently than you used to. It has given you fetishes you would otherwise never have and instead of innocently walking by a store, you’ll find yourself trying to get an upskirt view, or catch yourself staring at a girl tries on her shoes. The problem is that the internet is a safe haven for all this shit, while being out in a mall leaves you open to the elements.

Here are some pics of Penelope or her sister Monica Cruz trying on shoes and giving some upskirt peeks, so you don’t have to go to the mall to get what you need. You’re welcome.

Posted in:Monica Cruz|Penelope Cruz|Unsorted

2007

06

Apr

I am – Haylie Duffgusting Leaves the Gym of the Day

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There was a time in my life when I needed work badly and landed a job giving tours on horse drawn carriages around the tourist part of town. The job fucking sucked and I got fired when I threw a pile of horse shit on this obnoxious fat couple who wouldn’t stop making stupid jokes about the hat I was forced to wear. I just lost it and that was the end of that career move, but I will always remember how cool the horses were, even if they were hungry and mistreated by the company, they were always so nice to look at.

The duffgusting sisters, are not real horses, they just have horse shaped heads, and that makes them not so nice to look at, especially when they are rockin’ a pair of shorts over spandex pants like they are trying to hide their dumpy ass from the world. If you are going to wear spandex, you don’t have to rock shorts to cover your fucking ass, even if your ass is disgusting. Just wear shorts to begin with because it won’t make you look like an insecure cunt too scared to show the world that you “aint all that”. It’s like when girls used to cover their asses by tying sweatshirts around their waists, or when fat chicks swim in shirts…You are ugly, deal with it, hiding it won’t make your bad ass go away….

Posted in:Haylie Duff|Unsorted

2007

06

Apr

I am – Mischa Barton's Dumpy Ass and Legs of the Day

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If Mischa Barton hit the gym and maybe rocked the “ass blaster” machine that fags at the gym I used to work with seemed to love, for obvious reasons, I think she could almost be hot. Her problem is that she was always skinny growing up, she could always eat whatever the fuck she wanted and she never had to jog. In highschool, everyone was so impressed by her and jealous of how she was a size 2, while they were a little more chubs until they joined the gym to look like Mishca, all while Mischa kept riding through life, with the illusion that she was hot and slim….

The one day, she turns 25 and looks down at her seemingly skinny legs, only to see the flesh flapping in the wind and her dumpy ass slowly becomes a mound of cellulite you could fit a fist into at the top of her thigh….

These pics were almost hot, I was almost feelin’ her for the first time since she was under the bed puking in The Sixth Sense, at least she’s picking her shorts out of her ass to make them worth posting.

Posted in:Mischa Barton|Unsorted

2007

06

Apr

I am – Mischa Barton’s Dumpy Ass and Legs of the Day

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If Mischa Barton hit the gym and maybe rocked the “ass blaster” machine that fags at the gym I used to work with seemed to love, for obvious reasons, I think she could almost be hot. Her problem is that she was always skinny growing up, she could always eat whatever the fuck she wanted and she never had to jog. In highschool, everyone was so impressed by her and jealous of how she was a size 2, while they were a little more chubs until they joined the gym to look like Mishca, all while Mischa kept riding through life, with the illusion that she was hot and slim….

The one day, she turns 25 and looks down at her seemingly skinny legs, only to see the flesh flapping in the wind and her dumpy ass slowly becomes a mound of cellulite you could fit a fist into at the top of her thigh….

These pics were almost hot, I was almost feelin’ her for the first time since she was under the bed puking in The Sixth Sense, at least she’s picking her shorts out of her ass to make them worth posting.

Posted in:Mischa Barton|Unsorted

2007

06

Apr

I am – Lohan Tit's in Bra of the Day

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Someone told me that I am not funny anymore and that the site isn’t what it used to be. I don’t really know what that means because I am too lazy to read the shit I used to write and I never really thought this site was all that funny. I tell people I write comedy because it’s better than telling people I rock a blog and the reality is that any social observation can be considered comedy even if it doesn’t make anyone laugh….

I think the reason this bitch said that was because I asked her for nudes, she’s 27 and was like “I am too old for that, noodz are for 17 year olds” or some shit, so I land on her myspace and it is flashier and more high tech than then girls I met when I did a guest presentation at my stepdaughter’s school about running a website, they were 14. So I asked her what the double standard was, why tell me that you don’t do nudes cuz you aren’t 17, while rocking myspace like you are and that’s when she said I wasn’t funny.

I guess you’d be more interested in hearing about how hot the 14 year olds I met at my stepdaughter’s school are, but I am all fucked up and sick today, so I’ll just post pics of Lohan with a little bra action, it seems like everyone’s doing it. In the celebrity blogging world, they get excited over bra’s, nipples, sex tapes, and vagina slips…I came across one today that had a whole post analyzing her outfit and whether she’d be wearing the same shirt if she wasn’t wearing a bra because then it’d be a boob flash or some shit. I am hoping he’s doing it for search engines, otherwise he’s just advertising to the world that he’s a total fucking virgin….which by default, having a celebrity site pretty much already does….because guys who get pussy aren’t out cropping pics of Lohan’s bra, they are out getting pussy…you get it?

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

06

Apr

I am – Lohan Tit’s in Bra of the Day

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Someone told me that I am not funny anymore and that the site isn’t what it used to be. I don’t really know what that means because I am too lazy to read the shit I used to write and I never really thought this site was all that funny. I tell people I write comedy because it’s better than telling people I rock a blog and the reality is that any social observation can be considered comedy even if it doesn’t make anyone laugh….

I think the reason this bitch said that was because I asked her for nudes, she’s 27 and was like “I am too old for that, noodz are for 17 year olds” or some shit, so I land on her myspace and it is flashier and more high tech than then girls I met when I did a guest presentation at my stepdaughter’s school about running a website, they were 14. So I asked her what the double standard was, why tell me that you don’t do nudes cuz you aren’t 17, while rocking myspace like you are and that’s when she said I wasn’t funny.

I guess you’d be more interested in hearing about how hot the 14 year olds I met at my stepdaughter’s school are, but I am all fucked up and sick today, so I’ll just post pics of Lohan with a little bra action, it seems like everyone’s doing it. In the celebrity blogging world, they get excited over bra’s, nipples, sex tapes, and vagina slips…I came across one today that had a whole post analyzing her outfit and whether she’d be wearing the same shirt if she wasn’t wearing a bra because then it’d be a boob flash or some shit. I am hoping he’s doing it for search engines, otherwise he’s just advertising to the world that he’s a total fucking virgin….which by default, having a celebrity site pretty much already does….because guys who get pussy aren’t out cropping pics of Lohan’s bra, they are out getting pussy…you get it?

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

05

Apr

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I keep getting pretty negative emails and comments from girls because I constantly ask them for pictures of their boxes. One girl sent me a site with a picture of her fucking bush on it, then I asked her if she wanted to work my birthday party, she answered that she wasn’t a stripper and I said that I wasn’t lookin’ for strippers, but was looking for whores. She lost it calling me a disrespectful piece of shit and how dare I talk to her like a piece of trash. I guess she forgot that she put her pussy publicly on the internet for all of you to jerk off to. I won’t be linking it though, cuz I don’t like giving people more attention than they deserve….

I also got an email from someone telling me that they stopped emailing me cuz all i wanted was pictures of her box and that she thought we were friends but I ruined that friendship cuz I only wanted pics of her box and not good conversation….

I also messaged a girl on my AIM that I wanted to see her naked and she blocked and deleted me….

I don’t know where the exhibitionist girls who don’t need my respect are, but I know they aren’t the people I’m talking to.

I guess we don’t need girls when we’ve got stepLINKS, so have fun, don’t click too hard, asshole.

Kimberly Stewart’s Ass in FHM
GO

Britney Spears Stains her Shirt and Shows Her Nipples
GO

Joe Francis May Be Going to Jail to Film Prisoners Gone Wild: Pick Up the Soap Or I’ll Shank Your Pretty Ass
GO

Dita Von Tease in Penthouse
GO

Nuns Gone Wild
GO

Camping Crotch Shot
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I am the number 17 Celeb Gossip Blog with the Most Buzz Which Is Funny Cuz I Don’t Really Do Celeb Gossip
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Nude Modeling on Vacation
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Smoking Pic for Horny Lohan Wanker
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Rosario Dawson’s Hot Ass
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Pete Doherty is Piercing His Cock
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Girls Hosing Each Other Down on the Street
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Posh Spice Showing Some Stomach at the Ski Hill
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Photobucket Panty Posing
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A British Prep from the Country Has To Become a Graffiti Artist
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Craigslist Ad Gets a Woman’s House Destroyed
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Photobucket Bed Wetting
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Stavros Has Herpes and Bangs Hilary Duff Now
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Top 10 Unlucky Celebrities in Love
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Photobucket Black Panties
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Reese Witherspoon in a Pregnant Chick Suit
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Girls Rubbing Up on A Massive Penis for a Gameshow or Something
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Photobucket Rainbow Bright Ass
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I am not a Good Celeb Blogger, But This Video is Called Jennifer Garner Naked in the Shower and I don’t Think it’s Her
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Jennier Love Hewitt is a Prude Trying to Prove to Herself that Her Tits Get Her Wear She Is Today…By Posing in a Corset
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Shower Ass Kissing
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Cutest Celebrity (baby)
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Lauren Conrad has a Sex Tape
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Rose Mcgowan and Rosario Dawson Rolling Stone Cover
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Photobucket Downs Syndrome Shower
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Ugly Betty is Ugly By Hollywood’s Definition of Ugly But You’d Still Stuff her Like a Burrito
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Who the hell is Natasa Bekvalac and Why Is She Posing in a One Piece Bathing Suit
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Hayden Panettiere See Thru Video
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Jennifer Lopez Wants to Stay Fat
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There are Rumors of Nude Pics of Lohan Floating Around – Who Cares, I’ve Already Fucked That Bitch…
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Photobucket Teen Ass
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Some Girl Named Simona Fusco at an Event Showing some Tit
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Wicked Weasel Ass
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Russian Wedding Cat Fight
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Out School How to Eat Pussy Video
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Hilary Duff in Short Shorts Like a Good Ol’ Horse…
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Photobucket White T-Shirt Shower
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This is Britney’s New Boyfriend
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Shyamali Malakar the American Idol Fag’s Sister Nude Photo
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Lucy Pinder Topless, I Feel Like I Already Linked This
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Gemma Atkinson in Loaded Magazine
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Michelle Hunziker Showing Of Her Long Legs and Tight Ass
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Photobucket Coed Shower
GO

Amazing Bowling Shot, Too Amazing to Make My Bowling Team
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The Best of Craigslist
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If you’ve made it this far, you deserve a cam show
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Tranny McGuyver
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Her Back Is Her Instruction Manual
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50 Best Bums in the World, but not the kind of bums I like…
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Some Body Painting Pictures
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You Need Sex, I Need Money, This Spray Will Do Both
GO

Bonus:

Lucy Pinder Topless in Nuts Magazine Movie I Can’t See
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Lucy Pinder Topless in Nuts Magazine Movie I Can’t See Part 2
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All Via Use My Computer
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

05

Apr

I am – Pregnant Shoe Shine of the Day

I remember when I was working out of the Starbucks in the richer neighborhood, trying to surround myself with hot bitches instead of the crack whores and gutter sluts I was used to, even though I prefer the gutter. Anyway, there’d always be rich knocked up trophy wives hanging out talking about how excited they were to start a family and shit. There were days when the post birth bitches would show up with their stupid kids and talk about how amazing their little happy lives are and how perfect, advanced, cute their kids were while their one single friend, or friend who can’t get knocked up sat and watched in envy….But my favorite type of mom is the first mother who would come in to get themselves all kinds of food, because it was the first time in their lives that they could splurge and not have to purge. They already landed the rich dude, and now that his spawn was inside her, she was linked to him for life and every time one of those kinds of bitches would come by the coffee shop, they’d make a point to tell the world how they are 4 months pregnant to either justify why they are eating that much, or to justify why bitch is fatter than the Wal-Mart check out girl with diabetes…

When I saw this pregnant chick shining shoes video, I had no choice but to put up here, because this is the kinda pregnant chick you want in your life, one who still knows how to work and who probably got knocked up by some dude she doesn’t know while high on crack and is low maintenance. This bitch is authentic, she doesn’t pretend that she fucks and let’s the love of her life bust nut inside her for promises of the perfect happy existence with the rich husband and the Range Rover. She does it cuz that’s what Jesus wanted for her….Amazing.

Posted in:stepTV|Unsorted

2007

05

Apr

I am – Rosanna Arquette on the Beach of the Day

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I like people who swim with their shirts on. I feel like I already wrote about this, but it’s fresh in my mind because I saw a movie where all these good looking assholes were out by the pool doing whatever it is people by the pool do, I’m taking cocktails and cigars and bitches in bikinis with huge tits spilling out of their tops and shit, but there was this lonely fat guy in the corner wearing a fucking t-shirt in the pool. I never understood whether it was out of courtesy to not make the other people at the party disgusted or if it was personal disgust that they couldn’t deal with showing off the state they let themselves get to… I guess it doesn’t really matter, but I can tell you that Rosanna Arquette is probably hiding the fact that her aging ass isn’t what it once was. With age comes menopause and other exciting things that make a woman like her stop fucking and take up something more interesting like Toll Painting or fucking crotchet. I haven’t got issues with a fat middle aged celebrity hiding her soft spots, but I do have issues with them rockin’ sports bras, but that’s probably cuz I can’t accept the lie she’s telling with her outfit. We all know bitch hasn’t seen a gym since 1998 when she was hot and unfortunately for her toll painting and crotchet isn’t a fucking sport….I don’t know where I am going with this but I do know that she is suckin in her gunt like her brother is a tranny going for the whole operation, tryin to suck in his dick by cutting it off, too bad for him that he doesn’t have the same issues as you that would allow him to keep his cock because it’s so fucking small no bulge would show in his mini-skirts….CUDDLES….

Posted in:Rosanna Arquette|Unsorted

2007

05

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere See Through Dress of the Day

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The day I realized there was no such thing as innocence was when I saw a Nun with a coldsore. I guess she could have got it by sucking a herpes ridden cock for Jesus, but I can only assume she was one of those reformed nuns, the kind of girl who was real fucking bad in her youth and had only one option to turn things around when she was a little older and that was through god. I guess she could have also got the cold sore from sharing that dirty communion cup they make everyone share or maybe even caught it in a restaurant from dirty utensils, but for this post she was a whore who turned shit around, because here are pictures of that bobble head Hayden Panettiere wearing a see through dress. I haven’t decided if see through makes a whore, but judging how these starlets are livin’, it’s only a matter of time before she’ll be tending to her herpes, only they may not even be on her mouth. This is when I say “her other lips”, but get made at myself for being such a cunt.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted