So why the fuck is there a dude behind Pam Anderson in a dress. I know bitch has hep and I can only assume she’s at an HIV group meeting or something, you know it is the Gay disease. I heard somewhere that fags who like to fuck straight married closet cases hang out in bath houses dressed as women cuz it’s an easier transition for the straight married guy to make his way into the world of gay. If you are wondering where I hear this, I used to was sheets and clean the rooms at a bath house. One of my more exciting career moves.

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The only thing better than old ladies, is naked old ladies. I do not have an old lady fetish, thinking about their used up cunts doesn’t get me off, but the simple fact is that pussy is pussy and even if a woman is old enough to be your grandma, I don’t feel like I am in the position to discriminate. If I am at the old folks home changing bed pans and shit, and a bitch is like “stick it in my cooter” on they have old lady terms for cooter like “English Muffin” or “Werther’s Original”, who am I do say no. I am not a philanthropist, and I don’t do charitable things, but if I get to cum, then it’s not really charity, and we are all fucking winners, and ever since I was a kid, I always liked winning.

Point of the story is, old ladies let you cum inside of them, and although it may be dry and unpleasant, bitch can’t get pregnant. The home’s usually frown upon that shit, and fire and drunken mexican for crossing the line, but I think they are just jealous that I’m the one getting pussy. That was my post, how’d you like it. Asshole.

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People make me laugh, they sit at home, because they don’t have the luxury of having any motivation in their lives or social skills. A serious computer addiction and virgin status make them scared of the world, so they sit at home and surf porn, pay for web models to get naked for them, jerk off more than twice a day and yell at their mom’s when they are asked to bring out the garbage or to get a outside for some fresh air. It’s the life the internet has created for these losers. I am glad that internet hasn’t done that to me, drinking has and my mom doesn’t shit on me about being a loser, she’s dead.

Anyway- the point of all this is to say that some motherfucker is watching TV and sees a partial nude shot, even for just a split second, and next thing you know he’s pausing and zoomin on his DVD player to get a closer look so he can bust a nut to his favorite celeb nude scene. You know, pretending the bitch is in the room with him or some shit.

Lucky for us one of these losers actually took a screencap, and this is what they got of some bitch named Sarah Foster that no one’s ever heard about. I want you all to know that losers everywhere who fell in love with her on her Crossing Jordan episode have jerked off to this shit, thus making it the Celeb Nude Scan of the Day.

Real pussy can be hard to find, jerking off to blurry pics will always be there. I remember when I was too poor to buy or rent porn, have the internet, or meet bitches. I’d sit at home all day drinking and watching scrambled porn. I would probably jerk off twice a night to that shit, so your blurry masturbation material isn’t all that bad. I ain’t judging.

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I don’t watch TV, and when I do, it’s rarely shitty British crap that stars bitches who look like donkies, although I really have a thing for donkies, they are my national animal, part of who I am. Without the Donkey, whore’s in Tijuana would be getting fucked by dogs and ponies and shit just doesn’t have the same impact. When you go to Mexico, You want a Tijuana Donkey Show it’s just that fucking simple. How do you like the mis-use of capital letters in this post. I do it for all you uptight english professors who read this site. Stop reading books and lusting over your students, that shit will get you in trouble. I guess the point of this is to say, if I was a photographer, I’d hide in the sewer and under staircases, and balconies, cuz I have decided the ass shot, from the bottom up is my new favorite look for a woman.

Once I ran to you, now I run from you?

Go to TaxiDriver, dude’s site is tighter than any pussy you will get, I know – not saying much. Fuck you.

Via TaxiDriver

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I don’t watch TV, and when I do, it’s rarely shitty British crap that stars bitches who look like donkies, although I really have a thing for donkies, they are my national animal, part of who I am. Without the Donkey, whore’s in Tijuana would be getting fucked by dogs and ponies and shit just doesn’t have the same impact. When you go to Mexico, You want a Tijuana Donkey Show it’s just that fucking simple. How do you like the mis-use of capital letters in this post. I do it for all you uptight english professors who read this site. Stop reading books and lusting over your students, that shit will get you in trouble. I guess the point of this is to say, if I was a photographer, I’d hide in the sewer and under staircases, and balconies, cuz I have decided the ass shot, from the bottom up is my new favorite look for a woman.

Once I ran to you, now I run from you?

Go to TaxiDriver, dude’s site is tighter than any pussy you will get, I know – not saying much. Fuck you.

Via TaxiDriver

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You may be a whore, but this isn’t the 18 hundreds bitch. I would say more, but it’s really not that necessary. I am bored of retardedly huge tits, and the only people that like that shit are people who watch Anime and fuck sex dolls, because this shit’s not normal and you have to have a serious fucking problem to want to get up in that shit. I know most of you guys spent the better part of your youth jerking off to comic books, so this is what you consider to be a hot piece of ass, but all I can think about is how bad her pussy probably smells. That’s my story, maybe another one for the diary, bitches.

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Yeah I know I saw this bitch in the Eminem movie, or as I like to call it, the movie that changed my life. She didn’t have lips then and she still hasn’t fixed that shit, ironically she’s got enough pussy-lip for 8 average pussied women. You’d think that a couple thousand dollars would be a spend to make you look a little less like a bitch with cancer, I’d say Aids, but we already know you got that shit, bitch. I guess the hottness isn’t your friend’s horse mouth, or the fact that your dressed like a teenage runaway hooker who I just fucked for 8 dollars and a pack of smokes, it’s that you are showing your bush, and I know that’s the next big trend in Hollywood. We’ve done the no bra nipples, we’ve started with ass cleavage and we are currently rocking the “apples of the bottom” exhibitionism. Taryn Manning is next level so deserves respect for that, so donate to the local Aids Charity. Cuddles. Oh and I know that Homo at Egotastic posted this a couple days ago, which is fine, we all know he’s more into chest hair than pussy hair, but makes $8000 a month off the URL I gave him, and my marketing strategy. Good work, lookin forward to you coming out of the closet.

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Dude, I am not a dietician, although I like to pretend I am when I am cumming in a bitches mouth. I can tell you that Avril is gonna end up being a fat slut when her career goes to shit, especially if she keeps binging on ice cream while coming down from a rough night of doing coke of Sum 41’s dick. I wonder if the cocaine burns Sum 41’s dick, you know he probably hooked up some Rick Solomon Syph. I guess that’s the excitment of fucking a whore without a condom, who fucked a crackhead without a condom on video. Either way, condoms are for pussies and I know Syph is curable, trust me I know. I’d be much happier knowing he’s actually got herpes, cuz having fame and money deserved to be punished with STDs.

Point of the story is Avril has dumpy legs and tits that don’t match. Keep eating your ice cream bitch, when you get fat enough, you may be rockin a 42b, instead of this 12 year old girl bra you wear now. Good fucking story right? Put it in your diary you fucking homo.

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Dude, I am not a dietician, although I like to pretend I am when I am cumming in a bitches mouth. I can tell you that Avril is gonna end up being a fat slut when her career goes to shit, especially if she keeps binging on ice cream while coming down from a rough night of doing coke of Sum 41’s dick. I wonder if the cocaine burns Sum 41’s dick, you know he probably hooked up some Rick Solomon Syph. I guess that’s the excitment of fucking a whore without a condom, who fucked a crackhead without a condom on video. Either way, condoms are for pussies and I know Syph is curable, trust me I know. I’d be much happier knowing he’s actually got herpes, cuz having fame and money deserved to be punished with STDs.

Point of the story is Avril has dumpy legs and tits that don’t match. Keep eating your ice cream bitch, when you get fat enough, you may be rockin a 42b, instead of this 12 year old girl bra you wear now. Good fucking story right? Put it in your diary you fucking homo.

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The thing I love about Victoria Secret is the same thing all you fucking losers who jerk off to your mom’s catalog love. The fact that bitches in their underwear are fucking hot, even if they are fat. Point of this post is to say that Gisele, although from South America and speaks Portuguese and that shit fucks me up, I can’t communicate with her other than in the language of long-dickin’and cumming on her tits. I guess what is more important than the fact she can’t speak english is that bitch is from Brazil, the land of Boy-Girl Tranny Hookers and Aids. If Gisele is a Tranny, or if she has Aids, or if she is a Tranny with Aids, I’d still fuck her raw dog and suffer the consequences later. She is just that good and I hear the Canadian government hooks a brotha with Aids up with social service checks. I’d love to never work again. Gisele….give me a call. You slag.

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