Avril Lavigne the Canadian who moved in on the USA thanks to her song and dance routine, and never left.

Stealing all your jobs like she was a Pilgrim stealing the land from the Natives on this Thanksgiving Feast they also stole from the natives, in what they portray as a friendly dinner amongst like minded people who wanted the growth and development of the country, when really it was just a take what they wanted cuz they were fat white people….

Well, it looks like she’s out there trying to get a new album together, a second coming of christ, if you were to think she was your lord and savior and you worshiped her like the pervert you are, because I am sure Canada, the place I live think of her as some kind of hero, but she’d really only be a hero if she killed off her husband Nickelback when she had a chance.

I realize you just really liked that she played the 15 year old girl until she was 30…roleplaying…that mall rat life…and her old lady legs today aren’t exciting – but I am doing it for Canada.

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You are the skater boy….I said see ya later boy is the best way I can describe this photoshoot of Avril Lavigne, who in case you aren’t in your 40s, you will know was a fetish to perverts everywhere…so much so that when she was a teenager..she was exported from a mall in Canada to a mall in the USA…where she would live a decade and make a lot of money during that decade…as the embodiment of mall culture in America….despite her music being shit..

I guess an older, wiser, more sophisticated version of her has come out with a new Album…and this is the Album art…there are no weird hair color streaks, tattoos, EMO SCENE KID outfits, nipples, nudity…no “stripped” version of her…just a mom going to a PTA looking version of her since she is that age and may even have a kid with that Nickelback guy she married….

I feel obligated as Canadian owned media to cover some Canadian content I just wish it was more naked…I mean I don’t know how to write about a bitch in clothing anymore…there’s no nipples to caption and do my “voiceover” to…just totally uninspiring…which I guess you’d expect by the human embodiment of the mall…

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Canada’s favorite Mall Rat, Skater Girl, Avril Lavigne….is on the comeback…

The other day I saw she posted some of the least sexy boudoir photos I assume are for another album or some promo for something she’s trying to do…maybe it’s a Christmas Album or something that old timers do when they want to seduce their fans to buy into them….and give them more money….and fans is something Avril Lavigne has…thanks to people being fucking perverts into 30 year olds who dress like 15 year olds and sing weird teeny pop punk trash for 15 year olds…despite being 30.

Well, she went onto Late Night TV, in a Racy outfit to remind you all that she’s BACK…her and her skater boy will not SEE you later boy…they are right…here…

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here is her recent glamour shoot

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Avril Lavigne swims, even if she looks more like she just floats…

Another one of those late 90s child stars who has not maintained as well as our girl Britney Spears…but I guess part of me, as a Canadian, needs to have some Canadian pride for this small town girl, clearly tainted by American Mall Culture, like the Good Charlotte Brothers, who basically tried to exploit the skate scene, the punk scene, to create a mainstream version of that to the mainstream kids wanted to be about that life in the most bootleg way, and girl cashed the fuck in.

I don’t know if she’s still a Canadian icon, since she’s all Cali based, you can tell by her song Skater Boy that was always her dream…you know to be a puppet to exploit a trend…because it affords her to buy nice pools….unless that’s from her Nickelback divorce.

Either way, she’s a mess…from bathing suit pics, to life choices but I guess for her, it’s better to be Avril Lavigne than some Tim Horton’s baker…making donuts for all the blue collar dudes named GORD heading to the RINK with NHL dreams for their kids…

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JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

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Avril Lavingne is in a bikini…

So I guess, dreams do come true if you’re a sick fuck who wants to see Avril Lavigne in a bikini….

If you think Avril Lavigne in a bikini is a dream…which I know some of you do…thanks to Avril Lavigne being sexualized as the skater girl at the mall and people, mainly white dudes, being very committed to their childhood celebrity fetishes…you’re about as pathetic as I assumed you were….

Apparently, her butt crack is out, because she’s white trash…she can try to blame it on the Lyme Disease. I blame it on her having always been disgusting…with terrible style…playing a 15 year old for 40 fucking years…weird…but not as weird as your weirdos who find this hot.

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Avril Lavigne doesn’t matter, even to a Canadian like me, who was exposed to so much of her music, because Canada is oppressive and control the media, and legally make the radio / TV play 30 percent Canadian so that we don’t lose our culture and become American, like Avril Lavigne…which is hilarious when you think of Avril Lavigne being seen as a way to save Canadian culture, she was some bootleg pop punk pop shit that moved to LA the second it made a dollar…but to the governement…she’s Canadian content because she was born here…when nothing looks more OHIO mall parking lot in her DC shoes that this…

Well, she’s dressed as a chubby, middle aged, pop star from Canada, who has been divorced twice, has survived LYME DISEASE and is totally uninteresting, in spandex..

I don’t get it, but dudes in their 40s find her hot…or the memory of her hot, so here it is.

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I think she’s dressed as a late 90s fake mall rat punk with terrible style – who has been married twice to terrible Canadian acts because she’s Canadian and they get each other – now in her 40s..but still listens to Blink 182…when not dying of Lyme Disease.

I do not know what a WWE costume on Avril Lavigne will do to most of you loser perverts – but I bet terrible things….

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Here’s a Canadian Content moment from a Canadian based website and degenerate in his near 50s who remembers when Avril Lavigne was the Skater Girl looking for her Skater Boy in what was never hot, or even cute to me, because I don’t like girls who dress like boys who are girls…not even in this gender confused era of too many hormones in the food turned society into one gender….transgender…I found it creepy…but I know dudes who liked down girls who didn’t dress like strippers, in jeans and oversized t-shirts and sneakers not thigh high stripper boots, wearing men’s underwear or boxers not crotchless panties and it confused me…but she was seen as hot, a celebrity, made a ton of money and now she’s flashing her middle aged panties, no longer in Canada…still famous…not dead from Lyme Disease or the Shame of marrying Nickelback…and it’s not that exciting..who cares about Avril Lavigne..but it happened and it’s here..and now..

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So I was eating a burger and some SUM 41 came on, and I thought as a Canadian, who should know about Canadian things, did Avril Lavigne also die…him from his liver disease, her from her LIME Disease…from eating too many LIMES…but apparently she just got fat or pregnant…from Nickelback or clearly she took her Nickelback and bought some motherfucking CANDY….or BACON…cuz of CANADA…who cares….

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