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Archive for the Eva Longoria Category

2017

20

Apr

Eva Longoria Bathing Suit of the Day

I have always hated Eva Longoria. No, not because she married a big black guy a while ago, I’m not a racist, but because everyone loves her and thinks she’s wonderful and this great contribution to society…but I see a self hating Mexican, who identifies with being Mexican when it’s good for business…but not when she’s hiring Mexicans to be her slave…

But it’s nice to see that despite her efforts, she’s slowly becoming an actual Mexican, because she is a Mexican, rounding out all middle aged, looking like she’s been working at the taco shop making the toritillas…

I figure…good choice in the one piece big a burly satan woman.

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Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2017

15

Mar

Eva Longoria in Swimsuits of the Day

People love Eva Longoria….she’s an international star, maybe because she’s not white and the Mexicans and Spanish speaking people find her sincere and exciting in her charity work and Desperate Housewives shit she still leverages…

But she always came across as bullshit to me. I didn’t find her all that hot. I felt she was a pawn in some ABC primetime drama and I was convinced she was a fair weather mexican, you know the kind of first generation immigrant who was raised so white and spoiled so hard, that she thought she was white and was humiliated by her accented parents. The kind of Mexican who would vote for Trump because he represents the American dream they see in the movies. Who would hire Mexican illegals to do her gardening and housecleaning and who would eat Americanized Mexican food…just to fit in….except when it came to the casting couch…where bitch was Mexican as fuck to get the job….

But here she is trying on bathing suits regardless..and she’s not all that bad for an old Mexican…I mean I wish that’s what the Mexicans at the Mexican restaurants I go to looked like…instead they are fat and neckless…

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2017

23

Jan

Eva Longoria Can’t Escape Being Mexican of the Day

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Eva Longoria always came across as bullshit to me. I didn’t find her all that hot. I was convinced she was a fair weather mexican, you know the kind of first generation immigrant who was raised so white and spoiled so hard, that she thought she was white and was humilated by her accented parents. The kind of Mexican who would vote for Trump because he represents the American dream they see in the movies. Who would hire Mexican illegals to do her gardening and housecleaning and who would eat Americanized Mexican food…just to fit in….except when it came to the casting couch…where bitch was Mexican as fuck to get the job….

But as much as she denies her Mexican roots, her body…can’t fight it’s Corn Tortilla destiny….

Girl is thick…I bed her black basketball husband who dumped her when she was fit would love this new, short legged, thick version of her…

But I don’t…

Those hips should lie…but I guess it’s hard when you’re in leggings two sizes too small..and you’re 30 pounds fatter than you were two years ago…but not in your tits…because MEXICO!

This is one woman’s march…that shoulda stayed off camera….back home…on the couch…eating cake or whatever we’re witnessing….

I mean…unless this isn’t fat and she’s just got into body building….heavy squatting, dead lifting, ready to Mexican wrestle…

Whatever it is…..it’s not very hot…

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2016

22

Jul

Eva Longoria’s Downward Pointing Nipples of the Day

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Eva Longoria looks like shit…she’s old, she’s sloppy, but I guess she’s tighter bodied than the Mexicans she hires with their 6 babies as Mexicans do, because she’s got the genetics to be built like a Mexican but she tries so hard to not be a Mexican, she’s a cunt like that…I mean unless when it’s time for her to use it to her advantage like it was Sofia Vergara’s accent..you know that bitch can speak perfect english…

That said, on an international level, Eva Longoria is HUGE. People are fucking obsessed with her, they think she’s some philanthropist or superstar, it’s like the David Hasselhoff effect where no one in AMerica gives a fuck about the motherfucker, but the rest of the world just latched on and love that person…

Not that that matters, or her and yet another man / husband / it’s not her first…in her bikini looking dumpy and it’s not just me saying that…it’s her nipples…blame the nipples..stare at the vag.

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Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

24

Nov

Eva Longoria’s in a Bikini of the Day

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People fucking love Eva Longoria. On more than one occasion in my life, I have been at an event that Eva Longoria was speaking at, because I guess she’s fucking everywhere, and everyone there, who I guess were a captive audience, who left their house to see Eva Longoria, were freaking the fuck out she was there…and when I said that she was the worst, and that her book tour was just a scam, manipulating mexicans by her representing them as some kind of idol…who made it….they went nuts and listed all her philanthropic work..

While I’m there saying “she’s the kind of Mexican who hires Mexicans and underpays Mexicans because despite being a first generation Mexican, the family spoiled her like she was white, so that she would fit in amongst the texan racists, and racism is learned, so in being a racist, she too looks down on the very Mexicans who idolize her”….went over well…

Well, she’s at a bridal shower, or bachelorette party, getting all wild and crazy in her bikini, looking better than most Mexicans who work your local taco bell or hotel as a chamber maid…and despite being old, thicker, damaged from her 7 foot black basketball playing ex husband…you’d still fuck her…because you’re addicted to her fame, her power, the fact she’s in a bikini…

Livin’ the dream.

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Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

13

Oct

Eva Longoria in One Size Too Small Bikini Bottoms of the Day

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I will never understand Eva Longoria’s fame, but it turns out she’s really fucking famous on an international level. I remember meeting some dude at a bar who went nuts on me when I was talking about Eva Longoria, as I do, all the time, after he told me she was making some kind of appearance or speech….to which I said “who the fuck cares about that Mexican bitch”…she was on one TV show…that’s it…and it wasn’t even a good TV show…

It makes no sense…I know what you’re thinking, the guy who freaked on me was a gay Hispanic guy….but not even, he was some Irish straight dude drinking beer…who was very into Eva Longoria…

She’s not even hot, I mean hot for a 40 year old Mexican, they normally have 18 kids and a tortilla body….with no neck….but this one, thanks to being Hollywood, and the kind of white girl first generation Mexican, who hires Mexicans…to be her slaves just to prove how non-mexican she is in her primarily white Texas highschool that has turned into her life…

She’s rich, she fucks rich, she does fake charity work…and she wears bikinis like a middle age woman who doesn’t want to size up to admit she’s thicker…but prefers her fat spilling over the string bikini…that should be spanx shorts…

I’m not a fan. Maybe I’m racist..even though my name is Jesus Martinez…I just think this girl is full of shit, even in her bikini on some trashy hooker Pussycat Doll Fitness retreat…

I like the Estrogen patches….so feminine…

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

21

Jul

Eva Longoria Ass in Leggings of the Day

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Eva Longoria’s ass has had a lot of black dick in it…and here it is being held together with a high spandex count pair of pants…

She’s also Mexican, first generation, so that means she’s more an American Princess, more white and obnoxious and even racist than most white people….

You know the kind of Mexican who doesn’t make her own corn tortillas, but who finds it fun to wear a sombrero on Cinco de Mayo….

Straight from Texas to LA…..and for some reason…the world fucking loves her…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

15

Jul

Eva Longoria’s Sex Tape Trial Run of the Day

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I like the attempted crotch shot…but dude’s holding the iphone wrong..idiot….We live in a world where the paparazzi are really just tipped off by these self involved celebrities who want to draw attention to themselves…

Unless the celebrity is leaving the hot spot, the hot club, or is working with the paparazzi as part of their promotional campaign, promoting themselves…the paparazzi doesn’t really get these kinds of up close and personal pictures…

So Eva Longoria, who I guess is playing it “I won’t let these camera people ruin my life, I am going to do what I want, like rub my bikini clad vagina on my boyfriend while tonging him..because this is my vacation”….even though it’s more of a “Hey look at me make out with my boyfriend, I hope it gets the cover of the tabloids, I need the press”…

It’s all lies, but I guess so is Eva Longoria’s first generation Mexican, but thinks she’s white, thanks to parents throwing her into Texan suburbia…detaching her from their cultural roots…in a no taco for you…save your taco for white man producer because they’ll need a white, accessible mexican to type cast…fascinating…stuff…

Oh – what a coincidence…she’s in InStyle Magazine….Exactly my point..she’s a s elf promoting cunt…we’re onto her…this making out is her version of a sex tape that won’t destroy her.

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

07

Jul

Eva Longoria’s Slow Motion Bikini of the Day

Eva Longoria is insanely famous internationally…I have no idea why…

She’s not so famous on instagram, I know nobodies, who weren’t on a TV show or married to a black athlete…who have more of an audience….

Which makes me ask the question of who is actually more important in the world, the instagram girl, or the whore who fucked the right producer to get on TV, because they whore who fucked the right producer to get on TV has money and budget to be the biggest thing on instagran, while these instagram hookers do it grass roots, from the ground up, in a little DIY…

Sure they don’t get the same pay for campaigns, or jobs, but not everyhting is money, somtimes what is important for your self esteem is likes..

That said, here’s Eva’s boxy body, black dudes love, in slow motion in a bkkini while I go look for random girls tanning in bikinis, which in a landlocked city with no beach…is hard…even though it’s full of french strippers…who I guess are probably still asleep from all the full contact lap dancing…right…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Eva Longoria’s Bikini Ass of the Day

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Eva Longoria was in a bikini…and it reminded me that Eva Longoria exists..you know 30 something Mexicans who don’t look like they are 300 lbs corn tortilla addicts are an genetic glitch, some scientific advancement, or maybe it is that Eva Longoria, first generation America, over compensates as an Americam, and shits on Mexican culture, until she is asked to make statements about Mexican americans, like some kind of Figurehead or leader of a movement she knows nothing about, because she’s a fucking princess, who hires Mexicans to clean her fucking mansion…and even makes shews about the shit…

She’s so famous internationally, people fucking love her, except maybe the Jews, since she compared Trump to Hitler, and jews don’t like that, unless they are casting their next producion, in which case they don’t care, becasue Longoria fills seats…something that amazes me more than her average body…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

02

Jul

Eva Longria Dives in a No Dive Zone of the Day

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Here’s some typical Mexican behavior…you know just not following the rules…because she may or may not know how to read in English, but I assume she does, because she’s the whitest fucking Mexican, the kind with a Mexican staff to shit on, and make herself feel accomplished and less like a first Generation…expect when she’s needed to make a quote on Mexican rights, like calling Donald Trump Hitler, something that I am sure Jewish people would take offense to, but more importantly, that she’s got no business commenting on, as she’s so disconnected from anything Mexican, you know being a hollywood slut, that it’s just her PR play to remind you she exists…

Rember, you can never trust someone who dives in a no dive zone…No dive zone..

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Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2015

07

Apr

Eva Longoria in a Bikini of the Day

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I don’t know why I hate Eva Longoria….but more importantly, I don’t know why people fucking love Eva Longoria…I mean what the fuck has Eva Longoria done, other than be a Mexican who managed to play white enough to get cast on a shitty fucking show…that I guess the international market loves…because I meet people from all over the place..and they think she’s some type of god…when to me she’s a d-list bootleg actress who got lucky thanks to having parents who didn’t want her working as a maid in hotels…but instead as a girl who makes maids in hotels clean up after her…because that’s what cunts do…and apparently…they also grind up against dudes on balconies in Miami for the paparazzi in bikinis…

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Posted in:Eva Longoria

2015

06

Feb

Eva Longoria Gets a Wedgie of the Day

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People fucking love Eva Longoria. I don’t know what it is about her, but if you ever end up talking to anyone about her, no one calls her out for being a self hating Mexican…or for having a big vagina from marrying some massive black basketball player….or even for being old, and a bit of a scam, who’s only real success has been on a shitty soap opera show for the average american…they don’t care that she’s probably high maintenance and cunty….all they see is her for her philanthropy…or for her marketed as being a babe ass….

Well, all I see is her pants jacked up her ass…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Eva Longoria