There was once a time when single, immigrant, South American Sofia Vergara, floated into Miami on a raft, where she was forced to either work at Kmart, or shop at Kmart with her stripper money, to clothe her bastard baby, who I assume is in his 20s now…and now she’s peddling her own line of clothes at the discount retailer.

That was, unless she was rich, or fucking rich dudes early on, hence why she’s now living the hollywood fuelled American dream…but I don’t like that storyline as much…

I prefer the rags to riches to drug cartel cocaine trade stories of owning hollywood because hollywood runs off cocaine…it makes her tits more desperate, or more icons of the desperate girl out there in her 30s, who uses her to remind them that it’s never too late to make it…

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The Sofia Vergara backstory confuses me. I assume being Colombian, there are a lot of drug cartels involved in her rise to fame. I feel like writing this may even get me shot, because most South Americans with an American dream, who come to Miami at 20 with a kid in tow, don’t end up being huge stars on huge TV shows 20 years later.

Not only is she a huge star, she’s also one of these girl who women love, and men love, marketing perfectly…where even doing a campaign for Kmart, a cash grab since you know she doesn’t shop at Kmart, doesn’t turn people off…but instead makes the middle americans shop at fucking Kmart….

I just know that producers were paid off, dicks were sucked, some Scarface shit went down…because so many other people wish they were her…I’m talking actual Americans, but I guess they just didn’t have the drive…or the titties…

Either way, here she is cashing out…

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Sofia Vergara has a great scam going on. She was a single mother from Colombia, who managed to work her way into a sitcom where she plays herself, which requires no talent, not that being on a sitcom really requires any talent, just look at Jennifer Aniston and all the other overpaid idiots from the history of sitcoms, but this Sofia chick has it pretty good, it’s like they wrote the part specifically for her, and that’s safe to say, happened because of either really good blowjobs, even though girls in Hollywood are already giving really good blowjobs, it is the land of eager as fuck….or some weird drug cartel affiliation muscling the right people to make shit happen…since LA is the land of cocaine too…

Either way, she’s 100, still looks good, and is in Women’s Health for you to masturbate to, because you are too lazy to masturbate to footage of her from when she wasn’t 100 years old…

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Sofia Vergara may be old as fuck, but she does this whole showing her ass thing pretty fucking well…especially at her age…and more importantly at her level of battered pussy cuz you know she had a kid at 20, where shit probably bounced back for her, but she also went from Miami immigrant to superstar, sure it took 20 years, but she’s the highest paid person on TV now, and that only happens with vaginal insertion…FACT.

Vaginal insertion I’d like to watch and not just cuz I love vaginal insertion…and not just because I know this vagina can insert all kinds of things…but because I love this ass…despite it’s age…which is weird for me…but let’s blame Christmas…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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One of the co-stars of Modern Family posted this picture of Sofia Vergara hiding her old face because she is 100 years old…while photobombing the picture with what made her matter in the world of entertainment…her ass…an ass that doesn’t necessarily look good in these leggings…but when you factor in that it’s 100 years old…whether in SPANX or not…it’s still an ass mooning a camera…and that’s gotta count for something…

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You know that Sofia Vergara is so committed to staying hot that she’s got a basement lab where they kill orphans for her to drink their blood…but she doesn’t post those witch sorcery shit…that would make people think she’s weird…but she does post pics of her doing pilates or whatever this demonstration of different sex positions you can her in…but in her defence every picture of a girl is her showing off a different sex position…this may not be hot, but you’ll probably jerk off to it..

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When you’re Sofia Vergara and your tits have done so much for you, I’m talking being the one thing responsible for her entire career, unless my prediction that she’s affiliated with Colombian coke cartels who some of the Hollywood execs and agents owe favours to is fact, it is hard to turn your back on them.

That would be like a stripper with 10,000 dollar implants not wearing a low cut shirt…even though she saved for a year, not buying shitty designer clothes, or paying her deadbeat boyfriend’s rent…to get them. An investment and a friend always there for her.

Vergara knows that all we care about, all we want to see, is them tits, her 45 year old mom face isn’t what made her win Emmy’s.

The good news is that I like tits.

To see the CLICK HERE

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Sofia Vergara did a Harper’s shoot with Terry Richardson a few months ago that was recently published, I am sure I posted it on the site somewhere, laughing about how she’s fooled us all with her big fucking tits, from single immigrant mom to award winning actress, what the fuck happened, there’s a backstory here I know involves many things inserted in her twat.

I appreciate that she still tries to milk her tits to get some love, and that she’s aged pretty well and looks good, but I just think she’d be better with a little more desperation, as would Terry Richardson, when all these people have made it, and are pushing their 40s, they get kinda fucking boring….

Here are the pics anyway.

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Old Lady, Mom, Hooker or Gold Digger who was more of a Gold Miner that managed to find her way onto the international celebrity scene, despite having very little to offer other than huge tits, Sofia Vergara, one of the more confusing girls in recent years, is in August’s Harper’s Bazaar and she’s photoshopped so hard she looks like a cartoon, you know a sketch of herself, but unlike a cartoon you’d jerk off to, they seem to have neglected her fucking titties…I guess that means she thinks she’s made it cuz she’s not exploiting the only thing that matters…bummer, but I guess at 100, you gotta make those kinds of choices…

TO SEE PICS OF SOFIA VERAGA ON SET THE OTHER DAY SHOWING CLEAVAGE FOLLOW THIS LINK

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Sofia Vergara brought her big titties out in a bikini top and a pair of pants, like you’d expect an old lady who is a mom, but who works out, would do…you see flat stomachs are worth celebrating, but those cellulite ridden thighs and ass, just need to be covered up and the pic needs to be taken from a distance…because otherwise it takes away from her sex appeal…that is dying fast, but hasn’t died yet. You see you can’t fool nature, you can delay it, you can smoke and mirrors it, you can fool producers to give you work by extorting them like you learned growing up in Colombia, but being a chick over 21, every day that passes, is a day of being less hot. It’s a fact, you can google it.

That said, I appreciate her tricks to celebrate her big tits without ruining them with an sloppy ass, and I like that she’s on a sex swing, that may just be a swing, but if used properly, can be turned into one pretty easily…

I am not a fan, I am indifferent.

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