I don’t know why every time any asshole asks me who I find the hottest celebrity, I say Amanda Seyfried…I really have no idea…because I am sure structurally she’s not the hottest celebrity at all…you know if you were to factor in all the things that make a bitch hot….but I figure it has to do with hating every single one of these bitches equally, and for some reason Amanda Seyfried just doesn’t annoy me at all….maybe cuz she gets naked, maybe cuz she doesn’t play up the paparazzi, maybe cuz she lets her dog eat her pussy…who knows…but seeing her in her workout gear, not pornographic at all, is totally pornographic to me…here are the pics.

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I really like Amanda Seyfried….it has to do with her willingness to get naked in her work….and her seemingly laid back, who gives a fuck about the paparazzi or being seen attitude when she’s not out promoting movies…She goes out unshowered, dressed like shes homeless, something I can relate to, cuz she’s not some eager vapid bitch like Kim Kardashian, who treats everyday like a fashion show starring her….in some “look at me media” kinda bullshit….It just makes her seem like she’s more authentic, and when these photoshoots come along, we can get excited to see her all done up, since the rest of the time, she’s dumpy and shit…which I guess is just her living a normal life…and I did I mention she is willing to gt naked in her work….

She’s just the best thing in Hollywood, whether you want to admit it or not. She’s the new Lohan and Lohan has told me personally she hates her via text message years ago when Lohan used to text me…and that’s reason enough to love her.

Here’s her hot shoot for Marie Claire US.

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You know what’ I’m into…Amanda Seyfried…because even her bikini pictures that fucking suck, cuz she’s half covered up, and boring amongst boring people, doing boring things, in what is probably the least erotic way, I mean other that showing a little cleavage in what may or may not be a bikini she stole from a fat hippie…..are amazing…

Seriously, it’s like no matter what shit this bitch spews, I want in on it all the fucking time….and her nude scenes in movies are spectacular, but I guess that’s cuz she’s getting paid for that….

I should make her my bride in my religious sex cult I’ve decided it is time to start…you know since sex cults offer brides few chances to say no as they are bound in the trunk of the milk truck you’re using as a disguise when heading to your campground in the Utah hills….

If you know what I mean…..

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I have a thing for Amanda Seyfried…even when she’s making stupid faces,is unshowered, dress like a bummy homeless chick, I’m sold on her….because I like her hustle, mainly since she gets naked in movies and doesn’t buy into he whole bullshit celebrity shit, keeping her lowkey and mysterious, a whore with standards, like the high class escort who only fucks the guy with huge money, and lets us losers watch, but will never acknowledge our presence, cuz that would mean she’s coming down to our level and I just love the hard to get ones, even if every girl is hard to get when you’re me…except the obese ones….who I end up marrying cuz they promise free room and board….

That said, she’s wearing a bikini, showing some back, hiding her hot tits, but still just as erotic as if she was spread eagled and diddling…but that’s just the love speaking.

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She could be taking a shit and I’d find her hot…which is probably a bad example…because whenever a bitch takes a shit I findher hot…but I am using it figuratively, you know like back in high school when you’d pretend the thought of the hot girl shity was repulsive, like a bunch of faggots who wouldn’t lick that dirty asshole the second she let you, in a “girls don’t poop” complex that has ruined anal sex opportunity for so many, cuz girls are scared they will shit up your dick, all cuz of a stupid little night in high school…cuz high school is supposed to be the training ground for anal sex cuz bitch wants to retain her virginity and you wanna fuck something…when a dude told all his friends about her asshole slip up, giving her the nick name of “SHITNEY” and “Melishit” depending on what her first name is….following her right through college and into buttsex-less marriage….

If you know what I mean….and if you don’t it is that Amanda Seyfried could be wearing a snowsuit, a fat suit, a fucking burka and she’d still be hot to me…she’s got her spell on me…so seeing her walk her dog that probably licks her twat when no one is home….in a boring outfit….is pornographic enough for me….all cuz it features her…I’m creepy like that and she’s perfection…

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I hate most actresses. I find them irritating, average looking, uninteresting and obvious but more importantly full of shit….

For some reason…I don’t really know why….I fucking love Amanda Seyfried….she is my porn..not that I’ve ever jerked off to her…or even the thought of her…cuz I’m not weird like that and prefer jerking off to way more disturbing shit cuz I’m desensitized….but she just looks good, is cute, doesn’t annoy me, chooses both faggy roles, and slutty roles, and even when she’s being boring as shit…which isn’t happening today because she finally brought out a pair of shorts and a shirt that bring out her hotnes, a hotness she should always show off….I still want to be three inches up her asshole with my tongue….something I have a feeling her dog knows all too much about, cuz according to my friend, all the girls he knows are letting their dogs eat them out…on the regular…something that has probably been going on since the dawn of man, but that is still fucking odd…..maybe even odd enough for me to jerk off to….bringing this post full circle, making Seyfried actually my porn and not just my beacon of hope in Hollywood…..amazing…

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It’s pretty safe to say that Amanda Seyfried is the only celebrity I actually get down to…The reason is pretty simple….she doesn’t buy into the whole celebrity bullshit and I know this because she walks around for the paparazzi unshowered and in sweat pants, looking like shit, because she obviously doesn’t give a fuck and I know girls locally who aren’t famous for shit but they need an hour of prep before leaving the house, and that alone makes her perfect, but on top of that she doesn’t do the cheesy celeb party shit, she can’t be bothered, even though she’s bigger than Lohan ever was….she just isn’t out doing drugs with her vagina hanging out of her pants…and guess what…she actually gets work…work for both kids but then she squeezes out these adult movies where she gets totally naked…and her naked is a fucking vision….so seeing her in Glamour magazine reminds me that not everyone out there deserves to get shit on…..some need to be celebrated through masturbation.

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I don’t know but I love me some Amanda Seyfried ….I think it is because she is boring as shit in her everyday life…she’s dumpy, barely showerd, never at any events, is unlike all the other celebs dying to be seen, and that attitude makes me think she is good in bed…and sits at home and fucks all day….but as soon as there is money on the table, bith, like a crackwhore, strips down and gets naked, like she did in CHLOE and BIG LOVE ….and there’s something about bitches who get naked for money, especially when they look good naked, that excites me….

So here she is staying fit, titties be bouncing….

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There’s always that time when you look at a bitch you want to have sex with from a certain angle or on a certain day and all you see is a really bad, awkward, maybe even ugly face…it’s that split second where you go “what the hell was that”….sometimes it happens when you are having sex with them, sometimes when you wake up next to them, sometimes when you’re watching them work the ice cream shop across the street, sometimes when they are eating lunch in the park next to you…because the reality is no one is perfect, except maybe me, but that’s just cuz I dont have to look at myself….

So here is a picture of Seyfried in shorts, walking in the water like some kind of pirate, stealing her hotness and giving us this big old mouth and patchy skin….Just the way I like my celebrity masturbation material…attainable looking.

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Amanda Seyfried is a bitch who can put on a bikini that rides up her fuzzy hipster bush cunt who will still be boring…I think it is the way she carries herself when she’s not getting paid, cuz I’ve seen Chloe and bitch knows how to fuck both middle-aged men and women on camera, but the second the payroll stops, she turns into this sloppy, unshowered, bag of shit that looks like she has been camping the last 6 weeks.

It’s like she has no fucking interest in builing a rep, cuz idiots like me write about her as she continues to be a boring bitch, so we’ve pretty much made it easy for her….and thus here are some pics of her ass in what may be the most boring fucking shorts ever and here’s some Amanda Seyfried in Chloe , cuz really that’s the main reason I bother with her.

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