Unsorted Archives - Page 146 of 511 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

11

May

I am – Nicky Hilton's Ass in Spandex of the Day

There are reasons I would love to go to the gym to work out and those reasons are pretty fucking simple. Girls get dressed in spandex because I assume it makes them run faster on the treadmill while all the fucking meathead dudes lift weights behind them. I knew a guy who would get on a machine that was in front of the mat’s where the chicks would do their ass exercises or squats or some shit and dude would just park himself on that thing all day. He’d always brag to us how amazing a healthy life was because of the amount of hot ass he saw, but none of us ever listened. I just put on my shorts because summer is here, and they don’t fucking fit me anymore, like I grew out of them our some shit and they have an elastic waistband, making me have dreams that I actually cared enough to do something about it at a gym where hot bitches squat of me all day. Maybe it will happen one day….

That day seems to already have come for Nicky Hilton, I guess in preperation of her sister being in jail, Nicky’s decided to take her place as the party slut in the public eye, like the runner up at a beauty contest, only this beauty contest isn’t for pretty people, it’s for Hiltons….or maybe now that Paris is too pre-occupied going to jail, she hasn’t been able to distract Nicky from getting to the gym and being the hotter sister, like she has the last 8 years by convincing her to eat donuts instead of doing crunches…That’s just Paris’ way…

Posted in:Ass|Nicky Hilton|Spandex|Unsorted

2007

11

May

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

45 Comments »

I went to the strippers tonight, because that’s what I do, and because a friend of mine had landed some money recently from some accident settlement from years ago that just came through. He hasn’t given us any real details on the accident, but I am pretty sure he was molested by his priest. Either way, dude took us out, he didn’t buy us lap dances because he’s not that generous. Nothing really happened that is worth talking about, there were girls in stupid outfits and lingerie who got naked and ignored our harassment and avoided our group because we all look like fucking hurtbags. It was pretty standard and I am drunk and I know that’s not really surprising. I still found a way to do my links. That’s just how professional I am – motherfuckers…

Some Hot Girl Farts On Random People’s Faces on the Street
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Salma Hayek has Huge Milk Filled Tits
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Hot Angelina Jolie Commercial
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Fergie Working Out To Motivate all you Fat Fucks
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Jumpen is Some Dance That’s Big in the Netherlands…
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Cameron Diaz Watches Some Sex Show Cuz Her Biological Clock is Ticking…
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Jenny McCarthy Gives Sex Advice While Dressed Sexy
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Kate Moss Yoga Statue May Turn You On
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Lohan’s Belly Button Ring In Action
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Kate Middleton Panty Upskirt
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Former Miss Nevada Hospitalized for Partying
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Joanna Krupa Naked for PETA
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Maria Menounos Golfing Like a Slut
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Britney’s Back Up Dancer is Paid to Say She’s Hot
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Evangeline Lilly Hot on Kimmel Last Night
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Gemma Atkinson Takes Her Tits for a Swim Bikini Pics
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Funny Prank on some Jesus Loving’ Public Access Call in Show
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Some Cam Girl Let’s Us Know The Truth About Online Porn…if you care….
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Amateur Teen Dancing on Cam
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Photobucket Vagina
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LastNight’s Party Gets Some Chick to Walk Arond in Her Bra and Underwear
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Jack Osborne Does CobraSnake Party Cuz He’s a Cunt
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Some Chick Named Codi Milo Naked and Posing
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61 Year Old Phone Sex Operator
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Really Fucking Hot Photobucket Chick
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Gang of Monkeys Initiate a Member in the Bathroom
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Miss July Wins Playmat of the Year Video
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Dane Cook Sucks and These People Know It and Prove It…
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Funny Pornstar Fight….Cuz Porn Chicks are Knows for being Stable
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Some Guy Confronts His Crazy Girlfriend and the Guy She Cheated With
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Melanie Griffith Lookin’ Fucking Haggard in the Knees
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Best Air Sex Video of All Time
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Teen Pimped Herself at her Mom’s at Home Daycare
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Real Life Swingers in their 60s in Action
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Some Hot Sluts in this Music Video
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One of those Caption This Moments I Hate, But Laughed At
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Rachel Bilson Out With Her Homo Boyfriend From Star Wars in Shorts
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Some Chick Named Melanie Slade in Picture
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Amandah Berkowski Sends in Another Piece of Shit Video of Her Trying to Be Sexy While Singing Her Shitty Songs Badly…
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Melina Sarchese Argentine Playmate Posing….
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Girl Doesn’t Like The Taste of This Dude (NSFW)
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No Sex For Eva Longoria
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Hot Chick Taking a Bath
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Some Dude’s Hairy Wife
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Hot Adriana Lima Video
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Kate Moss Saved Lilly Allen’s Life…Unfortunately…
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Some Photobucket Chick I think is Fake
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You are Virgin, Or You Are In a Sex Slump. Girls Sense That And Don’t Like Guys Who Don’t Get Pussy – This Will Help
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

10

May

I am – Day Dreamin’ of a Fat Chick Making Out With a Skinny Dude of the Day

110 Comments »

It is hot outside and I am uninspired. It’s pretty much the story of my life. Part of me wants to update the site 50 times a day like a psycho blogger, but I don’t have that kind of creativity. I don’t have that many stories and I don’t have that much interesting to say. I think that’s probably why I will never be a famous blogger. I am okay with that because looking outside my window is all I really need. The girls are out in little clothes makes life good. I just ignore my wife and her obesity, my impotency and poverty and enjoy…

Speaking of fat chicks, I never understood is that it always seems like awkwardly skinny dudes always end up with fat fuckin’ girls. I am talkin’ really fuckin fat girls who normal guys don’t think have pussies and I just don’t get it, but it fascinates me. I assume that it is because fat on fat doesn’t work because genitals get hard to reach and skinny on skinny is too much bone on bone pain…but on hot days when i have nothing much to say, I slip into a day dream of watching a huge chick make out with her skinny boyfriend even if the footage is really shitty and doesn’t really show how fat the chick is and how skinny the dude is and how magical their public make out must be….

Posted in:stepDAYDREAM|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

10

May

I am – Day Dreamin' of a Fat Chick Making Out With a Skinny Dude of the Day

No Comments »

It is hot outside and I am uninspired. It’s pretty much the story of my life. Part of me wants to update the site 50 times a day like a psycho blogger, but I don’t have that kind of creativity. I don’t have that many stories and I don’t have that much interesting to say. I think that’s probably why I will never be a famous blogger. I am okay with that because looking outside my window is all I really need. The girls are out in little clothes makes life good. I just ignore my wife and her obesity, my impotency and poverty and enjoy…

Speaking of fat chicks, I never understood is that it always seems like awkwardly skinny dudes always end up with fat fuckin’ girls. I am talkin’ really fuckin fat girls who normal guys don’t think have pussies and I just don’t get it, but it fascinates me. I assume that it is because fat on fat doesn’t work because genitals get hard to reach and skinny on skinny is too much bone on bone pain…but on hot days when i have nothing much to say, I slip into a day dream of watching a huge chick make out with her skinny boyfriend even if the footage is really shitty and doesn’t really show how fat the chick is and how skinny the dude is and how magical their public make out must be….

Posted in:stepDAYDREAM|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

10

May

I am – Fran Drescher Bikini Pics of the Day

3 Comments »

Here are some pictures of Fran Drescher in a bikini. I know that you used to get off to her laugh, imagining it was the sound she made while cumming back when she was on the nanny and had a way tighter body than she does now, but it was 10 fucking years ago and it’s time for you to accept the fact that people get older and fatter but their laugh stays the fucking same, or at least i assume it does.

I am one of those guys that drops washed up crushes like last week’s kitchen garbage, usually when last week’s kitchen garbage is more attractive than my crush has become. I am also convinced that last week’s kitchen garbage smells better than this old slag does, but I will never know because Fran Drescher was never a celebrity I wanted to stalk, sleep with or jerk off to.

I did once know a guy that used to think this bitch was hot as fuck and only hire hookers who looked like her. Dude used to always sleep with hookers, but was emotional and would fall in love with them. For months at a time he’d commit to only one girl and only get with her like hey were fucking married, he’d get so fucking attached to them, that they’d usually have to get a restraining order on him when he would get violent with them for “cheating” on him with other Johns. That’s go nothing to do with these pics, but he did think Fran Drescher was hot and so do you, so maybe you are him. Hi.

Point of this post is that bikini or not, she’s got a huge dumpy ass that no matter how old you are you could at least try to eliptocycle off before dressing like this, it’s embarrassing for all of us involved. I got no issue with fat chicks, just when they dress in things I usually like lookin’ at, polluting my brain and ruining all the fun for the next few times I see a black bikini on anyone. When they only sell your bikini size at the big and tall store, it means you’re too big and tall to be sporting one. Real bikinis don’t come in this size. That’s the story I heard….But other than the mental scarring and the annoying laugh, I am sure she’s lovely….Cuddles.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

10

May

I am – Amanda Harrington Bikini Pics of the Day

6 Comments »

I don’t know who Amanda Harrington is, but her pictures from today are hitting the internet faster than herpes are spreading in hollywood. So I am sure you’ll figure out who she is soon enough. She has fake tits a decent body, so if you’re into chicks in bikinis this one’s for you. I guess not knowing who she is won’t change anything, since everytime you’ve ever seen a girl in a bikini in person, you never got to know her name, since you are pretty shitty at talking to chicks, but that didn’t stop you from jerking off to them

Speaking of jerking off, a reader sent in this email:

Since I’m at home a lot working from my home office I tend to search the web for porn. I guess you are all assuming I’m a male, but in fact I have a pretty vagina. I’ve been on a mad hunt for internal cum shot porn, however those are few and far between. I wanted to propose the idea to my boyfriend about making some videos, because I like it so much. Do people like this kind of pom, or am I some kind of freak that just subconciously wants to get knocked up? Could you do a poll with your readers to see how many of you out there like this kind of thing?

I so desperately want to see more cum in her ass action.

Thanks

I guess it’s my duty to put this shit out there, so if one of you 4 people who comments have anything to say about this…Go for it now. Cuddles.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

10

May

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

2 Comments »

Vote For Me….

Some of you know that I am in Montreal and I get no respect here either. There is a local paper called the Mirror and they do a Best of Montreal Poll. They have a category for best local blog and I feel like I should win it. To be counted you need to fill out 25 questions and since you don’t live here, that may be a pain in the ass, so I decided to tell you what to fill out. Do it if you can. I figure all votes will help and since you have nothing better to do with your time, this can fill it for 5 minutes. I make your life have meaning – Admit it…

Cast your vote for the 18th Annual Best of Montreal.

Rules:

One entry per reader. You must fill out at least 25 categories for your entry to count and to be eligible for prizes. Suspicious entries will be eliminated.

Questions marked with a * are required fields

Do not press Return or Enter until you have completed the form. Use the tab key or mouse to go to the next question.

Deadline for entries is May 11-07, midnight.

Results will appear in the May 31 issue of the Mirror.

Follow This Link

and Write Your Name, Phone Number and Email, Then Write This:

Whatâ€™s the best new thing in Montreal in the last five years?

DrunkenStepfather.com

Montrealer closest to sainthood

Jesus Martinez

Montrealer closest to hell

Jesus Martinez

Most desirable man

Jesus Martinez

Most desirable woman

Lara Roxx

Best Dressed Montrealer

Gold Pants Girl from the Girls Stealing a Bike Video

Tackiest personality

Jesus Martinez

Best Montreal weirdo

Jesus Martinez

Best neighbourhood

East End

Best minority

Brown People

Best place to spot celebrities

DrunkenStepfather.com or Time Supper Club Parking Lot, See I am – Christina Aguilera’s Tour Bus Video

Best place to have public sex

Anywhere, As Long As I Am Watching

Best Watering Hole

Any Park Bench with a 40.

Best pickup spot

The Corner of Ste Catherine and St Laurent

Best afterhours

Le Chablis Motel, They Rent By The Hour….

Best strip club

Beaudette, It’s Full Service from Hot Chicks Who Suck Dick….

Sexiest French pickup line

Mange ma plotte….

Best drug

Meth

Best busker

Homeless Man Dance

Best local actor

The Retard in that Boxing Movie that was Nominated for an Academy Award….

Best local actress

Elisha Cuthbert

Best local filmmaker

stepTV

Best art exhibit

Daniel Johnston Cuz Crazy People are Awesome….

Best author

Jesus Martinez

Best magazine/zine

DrunkenStepfather.com

Best Blog

DrunkenStepfather.com

Best rep/art house cinema

The Dollar Cinema

Best Mexican

Jesus Martinez

Best fishmonger

Jesus Martinez

Follow This Link And Make a Differnce. Your Voice Matters…

Now here are my links

Amy Winehouse Meth Teeth
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Heidi Montag Making Out With Some Dude at an ATM Machine. Whore.
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Really Big Tits on the Beach
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Paris Hilton Caught Driving and Crying
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Carmen Electra Will Teach You How To Be Sexy
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Christina Aguilera From When She Was Dirty…The Way I Like Her….
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Conan Can’t Keep His Eyes off Heidi Klum’s Tits
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Porn Star Randy West Interview
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Gretchen Calson’s Downblouse on Fox News Video
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Gia Allemand Maxim Spread
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Gia Allemand Video Shoot Part 1
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Gia Allemand Video Shoot Part 2
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Uncensored Clip From “Shut Up and Model”
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Some Busty Teen Doing Cartwheels With Her Big Tits
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Some Chick Dancing and Shaking Her Ass On Cam for you
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Joss Stone and Common New Video
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This Porn Company is Donating $1 of Every Sale to Don Imus’ Retirement Fund
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Lookin’ Good Hairy Assed Sweetheart
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Some Throwback Catherine Bell Bikini Pics
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Hot Car Wash Video
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Trashy Chick Fight
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Beckham Banging The Way He Likes It
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Posh Spice’s Car Broke Down
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Liz Hurley Topless on a Yacht
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Sanjaya’s Mom Busted with a Bong
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Kim Kardashian Without Make Up
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Cameron Diaz’s Hot Legs
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Sam Cooke in NUTS Magazine
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Pornstar Taylor Rain Smoking and Drinking When She Was 5
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Some Hollywood Plastic Surgery Shockers…
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Rickey Lake Lost 125 Pounds and Poses in a Bathing Suit For You To Tell her She’s Still Fat
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Some Chick Getting a Bikini Wax Video
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Vending Machine Kick
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Crazy Guy At The College Frat Party Who Has Never Got Laid in FleshFlicks – Gang Bang Etiquette Video – NSFW
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Drunk Hasselhoff the Muppet Remix
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Remember the Topless DJ
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Kelly Clarkson Performing Fat on Live With Regis and Kelly Video
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Lohan With a A Self Help Book
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Amazing Wedgie Video
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Eva Horvath in a Tiny Bikini
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Lucy Pinder Covers Up in NUTS MAGAZINE…But is still Hot Enough to Look At…
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Rihanna Looks Like an Alien
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Hayden Panettiere and Her Friend Rumer Willis Hangin Out
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Bra Wars in Zoo Magazine
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Someone’s Sister is a Total Slut on Camera for You…
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Photobucket Tits
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart Turns Hot or Hot Chick Turns – Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Shilpa Shetty Hot London Premiere Pictures
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Some Face Catching Video I Don’t Get It
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Chick Who Was in Penthouse Posing
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

09

May

I am – Kate Moss in a See-Through Dress of the Day

54 Comments »

I love Kate Moss and I love the fact that she is wearing a dress that is so See-Through that it’s like she isn’t even wearing a dress at all….it kinda fuels my dreams that all girls would walk around in their panties with no tops on, everyday of the week, because it would make grocery shopping a hell of a lot more interesting, not that I grocery shop, I am more into the whole Kraft Dinner, Ramen Noodle diet that I buy at the local convenience store, but even that would be a lot more interesting if the girls outside were naked. I realize that the fat chicks who don’t realize that they are fat, you know, the ones you see on the street in spandex would be the first to adopt this trend, but even that’s ok, any nudity is good nudity where I am from, even when it’s so fucking bad you question your sexuality. I guess that’s where I’ll end this post, because living a life of not doing much leaves little room to dig into my brain looking for stories I don’t remember because nothing I saw today really sparked any memories…

Making a stepDIFFERENCE in Hopes of Becoming the Most Socially Conscious Blog that Advertisers Want t Work WIth – WIthout Sacrificing Content

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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

09

May

I am – Britney Spears in Her Bra After a Show in Vegas of the Day

54 Comments »

I know these hit the internet the last couple of days and I guess that’s not going to stop me from posting them, because I generally don’t have any issues with being late on stuff, except for maybe my period, because I’d hate to get another abortion. I am not really a girl, but wouldn’t it be funny if I was and this whole time I was fooling you. I wish I was that genius, but I am not…

What I am though, is impressed that Britney could figure out how to write her name on her skirt, it’s like that movie Girl Interrupted where the bitch was all crazy for chicken. I don’t really remember it, but compulsively writing your name and then the word evil is some next level school-shooter shit and watching crazy people in action is always a good fucking time, especially when they are in their bra, broad shoulders and all.

The last time I saw a crazy broad shouldered person who thought they were the devil was this dude I knew from high school who turned tranny on us. One day he was Frank, then next day we had to call the mother fucker Princess. Dude took too much acid and instead of just sleeping it off, or jumping in front of a train or some shit, it tapped into some fucking weird part of his brain that made him think he was fucking royalty. Everytime dude got drunk from that point on, he’d rip off his shirt and try to get us to grab his bra covered chest. The only real issue about the whole thing is that he was a lazy tranny who didn’t take hormone replacement therapy and his whole hairy man chest would be exposed. He didn’t like taking no for an answer and when he got mad, he’d be pretty fucking destructive, so we all had to grab the motherfucker’s chest and tell him that we loved his tits for damage control. I wonder where Frank is now….

Making a stepDIFFERENCE in Hopes of Becoming the Most Socially Conscious Blog that Advertisers Want t Work WIth – WIthout Sacrificing Content

Find Out More on Breast Cancer and Make a stepDifference
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Buy Something From the PInk Ribbon Store and Make a stepDifference
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

09

May

I am – Jane Magazine Posts Smut and Gets Ads, I Post Smut and Get Banned By Everyone of the Day

6 Comments »

Jane Mag may be a woman’s magazine that I have heard was founded by some dyke who banged Drew Barrymore, but they still post pictures of user submitted tits for breast cancer. I am all for the breast cancer cause and I am all for the world being a little more lenient when it comes to tits, because I don’t think a naked woman is a bad thing, unfortunately for me, advertisers do.

I know that my content may be semi-racy and that I post tits on my mainpage, but I have been banned in schools and offices around the world. I am also not able to submit my website to Digg.com because it is banned. I was rejected from the Amazon affiliate link, I was rejected by intellitxt advertising and their competition called Kontera, I was rejected by Google Adwords, sites who used to link to me, can’t because google has me blacklisted. I have emailed other advertisers directly, like Rockstar Games, American Apparel, film companies, clothing companies, music labels, and Axe deodorant spray, because this fucking mexican is trying to make some fucking money. All of them turned me the fuck down because I have tits on the mainpage…

So I have decided that Jane magazine’s attempt at hiding the fact that some lesbian in her office wants to see her readers tits, the same way I ask for nudes, by attaching her smut to a fucking cause and hiding behind a woman’s magazine title. Using the whole fucking locker room theory of sisterly breast advice, is a fucking good approach. So from now on, when I post pictures of tits, I will link to the breast cancer website and when I post a pussy slip, I will post links to cervical cancer, and when I post sex tapes, I will post links to AIDS charities and turn this fucking site into some kind of philanthropical journey of nip slips and fighting fucking cancer and disease…

The point of this post is to say that mainstream media are a bunch of hypocritical cunts and that’s all I have to say to that.

Check out the Jane Magazine Smut
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Thermasilk Owned By Unilever

Oakley

Dove Owned By Unilever

Concierge Owned By Conde Nast (owners of Jane, But Still Next To Tit)

Making a stepDIFFERENCE in Hopes of Becoming the Most Socially Conscious Blog that Advertisers Want t Work WIth – WIthout Sacrificing Content

Find Out More on Breast Cancer and Make a stepDifference
GO

Buy Something From the PInk Ribbon Store and Make a stepDifference
GO

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

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