Courtney Cox was the cast member of Friends you didn’t masturbate to and now she’s 50 and you still won’t masturbate to her…even when she squeezes her fat 50 year old ass and all it’s dried up menopausal glory into a bikini bottom, unless of course…that’s what you’re into…a celebrity with too much money who has defied the natural aging process where she can declare 50 is the new 30 thanks to botox, a personal chef and a personal trainer who is working me everyday since I have nothing else going on – but I do have all this money..

So happy fucking birthday you old hag…who looks better than obese 20 year olds I’ve fucked, but in their defence, one was albino, the other downs and the third was wheel chair bound…because Diabetes ate her toes.

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This is freaking me the fuck out…and you have to understand that I don’t fear skinny girls…if anything I support and endorse fitness/starvation / anything so that you don’t end up fat…but there comes a time where I guess being skinny is flawed, and as much as I hate admitting that…cuz LI love skin and bones…this fucking Spine is the shit nightmares are fucking made of…seriously…straight out of a horror movie….I don’t know what the cause of this is…but shit does not look fucking normal…and all I can think is how disturbing fucking her from behind would be…staring at that like it was an Alien creature ready to rip your fucking dick off…

I find this really fucking WEIRD….and I have fucked some really fucking weird, questionable things, but on the positive side of things…her ass isn’t bad for a 50 year old mom….so if you focus on that…it’s almost as though that freakish back isn’t there haunting the rest of her….

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Courtney Cox is old. She is also the less attractive bitch from Friends, 15 years later, more importantly, she is a victim of “I can’t believe this bitch had sex with that man enough to make babies and get married”….onee of those “I can’t see past her sexual history no matter how hard I try”…cuz sure she has no standards, but you can’t slot me in with David Arquette’s sloppy seconds eater….if you know what I mean….not to mention she’s old….making for a real unfortunate state of affairs…the only thing going for her is that she’s rich, not fat, and will never be alone for those reasons alone….even if she’s old…cuz there’s always a younger gold digger willing to get up on an old sitcom fetish…like her boyfriend co-star who posted these pics of her on twitter….spotting opportunity and jumping it…possibly cumming inside of it…hoping it isn’ t already menopausal….

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Sometimes, even when a bitch is better off retiring….fading into obscurity with her circus clown husband, because even though she tries to be fit, and still has sloppy inner thighs, cuz that’s what happesn to old bitches, I can appreciate her showing off her panty upskirt like she was an up and coming star trying to get noticed, or more likely, an old washed up star who doesn’t give a fuck anymore…

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Here is some Courtney Cox mom nipple that looks like it is a small implant cuz she knew that her show involved her in a bikini and she had to do something about the sloppy empty milk sacs that Arquette needed to escape, even though he’s David Arquette, the guy every girl is humiliated to have ever had sex with, unless they are in their 20s, using his money and using him for show and tell at the frat parties….or if they are Courtney Cox and get knocked up and try to make a family with him….in some kind of really fucking weird way…I mean I’ve been dumped by shitty girls, but I was always shittier and knew it, where this Cox thing just doesn’t add up….

Either way, here’s her nipple…and reminder that the ocean and their waves are our friend….unless you’re Japan….FOLLOW ME

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Here’s Courtney Cox on set in a bikini, cuz TV doesn’t find mom’s in a bikini inappropriate, but I do.

Nothing like a mom body in a bikini to encourage us to get married, knock a bitch up, only to leave her and spend your money on young groupie pussy, until you realize that you can’t keep up with young groupie pussy, and that all they want is for you to be a dancing monkey novelty act they show off to their friends at their college parties all while spending your Scream 1 through 3 money, that you don’t mind them spending until their tighter than your wife’s pussy gets boring and you get tired, making you crawl back to the familar menopausal vagina, tell her that you miss her and the kid, and that you want your old life back, blaming a midlife crisis and jealous about her and her costar from TV, only for all this to be a thing of the fucking past….Right?….FOLLOW ME

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I stand by yesterday’s Courtney Cox Bikini post where I said she looks like shit cuz “she looks good for 45” doesn’t really work for me because good for 40 isn’t the same as good for 20 and just because she has that handicap against her doesn’t mean she gets extra points…

That’s not to say I wouldn’t taste her from the inside, It’s just to say if I was David Arquette, I’d escape this to be some novelty act to 20 year olds who have seen Scream with their tight vaginas, only to come crawling back, begging for my family back, blaming a midlife crisis while holding the happiness of our child as the beacon of hope to get her back, when I was tired of whoring myself out footing the bill and saying catch phrases or answering questions about Jennifer Aniston….

That’s all I have to say about that…

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I don’t know if thes epics are old or new…I try no to look at these things too closely, you know like staring at the sun, I’m scared I’ll go blind…

If I was David Arquette – and thank god I’m not – I would have got rid of Courtney Cox too…at least based on these bikini pics – cuz she’s old, tred and the collagen’s not holding up her ass the way it used to. Maybe it’s the pregnancies…maybe it’s laziness…maybe it’s just straight up aging..but whatever it is…it’s disgusting…

I know what’ you’re thinking – that I’m an idiot and that she looks great for 40…but that’s exactly my point…thanks for proving what I so gracefully failed at getting across, great for 40 isn’t great for 20 and if you don’t have to be stuck with that shit and you can go for the 20 year olds cuz you were that guy in Scream…you sure as hell better…cuz you only live once….and it preferable to be done with a hot box full of youthful joy and a willingness to spend your money and treat you like the best show and tell presentation…than be in the shadow of some bitter, old, cunt…even if Arquette is pulling some pussy shit and trying to crawl back to Courtney Cox cuz he ran out of money and was tired of being some tween’s dancing monkey financier in exchange for un-weathered pussy or some shit…kinda defeating the whole point of this post…..

I’m so insightful. I wonder why I don’t have a show on Oprah’s new network…

Posted in:Courtney Cox