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Archive for the funny Category

2009

02

Nov

Jerry Springer Funny Video of the Day

I didn’t realize that Jerry Springer was still on TV since I don’t have a TV, but it is.

This segment is about some dude who picked up a girl on the internet and somewhere along the way decided to meet her on the Springer show. Something anyone with a brain would know is a bad idea and not going to end in happiness, but instead with end in a brawl….in this case, fueled by the fact the chick turned out to be born a man, so he did what he had to do and tried to beat her up, but she ended up having some serious monkey skills and jumped all over the fucking place…..clearly staged but definitely funny….

I can’t help but love this shit because it still makes me laugh like it did 10 years ago, I am sure I would hate my life if I was Jerry Springer, because seeing this daily would get fucking depressing, but it is fucking ridiculous and I need tickets to be in the audience of this show before my die, shit is on my Bucket List….

Posted in:funny|Jerry Springer

2008

11

Dec

Jerking off Maintenance Man is Some Funny Shit of the Day

Here’s a funny video of a maintenance man who pulled a wack at some woman’s desk, but doesn’t end there, dude takes her gum and rubs it on his genital and re-wraps the shit so that she chews his shit without knowing, making one of the weirder fetishes I’ve seen today, but it’s not all that much worse than the times I’ve rubbed my dick on random things when people weren’t lookin, whether it be clean panties at laundromat, stirring drinks with my dick in bars, cumming on cigarettes and letting them dry before giving them give out back when I smoked, I mean seriously, if you watch your shit, people who like rubbing their penises on shit, or cumming on shit you end up putting in your mouth because you’re too much of a snob to let us rub or dick on you in the first place, wouldn’t have anything to rub their penises on or cum all over….so it’s really your fault for letting it happen.

Posted in:funny|Video

2008

07

Jul

Jim Carey Makes a Joke With Jenny McCarthy’s Bathing Suit of the Day

Jenny McCarthy and her long lost Canadian relative, who I assume she doesn’t know is her relative and decided that the connection she felt the first time she met him was love at first sight, when in reality it was just on some genetic level. It’s like when you met a cousin from another country for the first time and you just hit it off immediately because you have the same grandparents, only in this case you give them your genitals, instead of a gift certificate to Starbucks for Christmas. Leaving the rest of the world looking in amazement and wondering if you’re related or if it is just a coincidence that you look like you’re twins while making out with each other in public. I guess we’ll all just have to wait for the flipper baby to know the truth and I am not talking about that Autistic shit McCarthy is up on already, that baby’s from a previous marriage.

I never found Jim Carey funny, I actually kinda hated him up until recently. He’s just this clown of a person who tries too hard to get a laugh and looks like an asshole while doing it. He reminds me of some cocksucker in my class who would never shut the fuck up in his antics and annoyed everyone until he got beat up enough that his spirits and jokes just stopped, leaving him down and out and reclusive in a dark corner, going from the annoying life of the classroom to the weird kid in the corner no one notcies, that is until one day he decides to take out his rage on the world and stages a school shooting.

But I have to admit, this stunt where he decided to put on Jenny McCarthy’s bathing suit to fuck with the paparazzi/public and get a laugh was pretty clever and reminds me a lot of this closet case who would always suggest we do the gayest things because it would be funny and for the sake of comedy. When he’d run around in ladies clothing, make-up and show a serious interest in Brad Pitt, we could pass shit off as a joke, but it got out of hand when he told me that we would really mess with our girlfriends at the time if they walked in on us sucking each other off. I didn’t really get the joke but he came back at me aggressively, because he thought I was ruining his joke and said that it would only really be funny if we timed it perfectly and the second they walked into the room expecting us to be playing videogames, I’d be cumming all over his face instead. It’d be a real fuckin’ knee slapper.

Sure, I was complimented that he thought I was worthy to take part in his joke, but I didn’t see much funny about letting him suck me off, it was just a little gay….

Either way, Jenny McCarthy’s body looks tight.

Posted in:Bikini|funny|Jenny McCarthy|Jim Carey

2006

08

Feb

Scary Sex Doll Of The Day

Everyone’s got fetishe, but I have always been against this sex doll bullshit. It’s not because I am a fucking born again, or against fucking inanimate objects, shit last week I shoved my dick in the toaster, hoping I’d feel something. Unfortunately, I had no luck and I’ve been applying polysporin to my dick all week, the burns just won’t go away and I think it’s infected. Either way, if you look at the pics of the above sex doll, the bitch looks like a dead body I saw on CSI, only bald. Anyone who fucks this shit’s got serious issue, unless they are drunk, but the dude who baths her, and changes her panties/wigs is always a little more fucked up. I wonder what his mom thinks when he brings this shit to x-mas dinner. “Hey Mom, I want you to meet my wife…” You are a creepy motherfucker, use your hand like everyone else. I am drunk.

Posted in:funny|Sex|sex doll|Unsorted