MySpace Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the MySpace Category

2008

Oct

Christina Milian is a Myspace Star of the Day

Christina Milian was kinda hot in that video of her roling around in mud. I was sure she was a slut with staying power and not a one hit wonder she ended up becoming, but it turns out that she’s back, only this time with Myspace Music, because no record company wants to give a one hit wonder who has been off the map for the last 5 years a fucking chance, but Myspace, in their struggle to stay alive while sites like Facebook and social networking in general are dying, has decided to give her that second chance. I remember when my wife gave me a second chance when we were first dating and I accidentally stuck my dick in about 15 different girls while she was away visiting her mother and I was excited about my new found freedom, it ended up with me marrying her and ruining my fucking life, and I can only assume that will be Milian’s fate. I like to call this not giving up when you are ahead and thinking you have what it takes when you don’t, and it always ends up in misery.

Check out her new song from her new album coming out on Myspace Records Because She’s Pretty Much Irrelevant now but I’d still fuck her, which isn’t saying much, but it’s saying something…..
GO

Posted in:Christina Milian|MySpace|Star

2008

Aug

Paris Hilton and The Good Charlotte Sister are No More of the Day

10 Comments »

So it turns out that Paris Hilton has finally come to her senses and dropped this whole lesbian theme that’s been going down the last couple months in Hollywood because it was overbearing and her career went to shit, by leaving her lesbian lover Benji Madden. The rumor is that she’s moved onto the CEO of Myspace named Chris DeWolfe, which is pretty appropriate considering that Myspace is dying as fast as Paris Hilton’s career and this is the kind of thing that a company in extreme desperation would try to stage to get back in the news……

Now I hate Paris Hilton as much as I hate Benji Madden and his suburban rockstar/popstar bullshit image with his fake tattoos, his sex with his twin brother that isn’t gay because it’s like they are masturbating since they are the same person, but I don’t hate either of them as much as I hate Myspace, because neither Paris or Good Charlotte fucked me over personally, I can just ignore their retarded behavior, but Myspace deleted my profile that I was trying to use to get famous like I was Tila Tequila and that shit’s not at all forgivable, kinda the same feeling Chris DeWolfe will feel when Paris Hilton moves onto new cock and he realizes that he threw away his marriage for this subpar broken down vaginaed slut in some act of desperation, mid-life crisis or just plane dirty ol’ man maneuvering.

Here is Paris Hilton celebrating the fact that she’s fucking an old man at the Playboy mansion with other whores who fuck an old man…..it’s nice to see like-minded people finally finding each other, it’s like when two socially awkward people who have no friends in their local towns, but find each other on the internet and end up marrying and living a happy life they otherwise wouldn’t live, but the lingerie, fake tit, blonde, get paid too much money to get naked and fuck on camera because we don’t consider ourselves everyday strippers/whores version…..

Posted in:Good Charlotte|MySpace|Paris Hilton|Playboy|Uncategorized

2006

Feb

Myspace Mom of the Day

17 Comments »

So I wrote a myspace message to some teenage mother. I respect fertile people and I think teenage pregnancy is really hysterical.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: DrunkenStepfather.com
Date: Feb 6, 2006 10:49 AM

if you are 23, and have 2 kids, does that mean you are a spic?
or are you native american on the indian reserve?
or are you just poor and trying to find a way to get an increase on the welfare checks.
I bet you have a mangled vagina.
Tell “Halen” (her son, named after Van Halen), Jesus Says Hello.

Love
Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Nothing says crystal meth lab in our basement more than naming your ghetto kid after a ghetto band. Especially when you are 23 and your kid is 7. Either way, this is her response to me.

For one thing i am not on welfare and have a good job and a boy friend that i love vary much and you should keep your words to your self.
Thank you April

I know how bitches like this work. They are sad and loney and get themselves knocked up in efforts to keep their man, and always have someone by their site. This sometimes ends in deadbeat dads, but seriously, if you were to slam this girl in the parking lot outside the local sports bar, would you want to be stuck with her life. It’s called murder suicide for a reason.

I know I can’t spell, but typos are funnier from teenage mother’s cuz you know their preganancy forced them to quit grade 8.

Cuddles.

Posted in:Mom|MySpace|teenage|Unsorted

2006

Jan

Myspace Mom of the Day

8 Comments »

I’m a fun loving girl and I believe that women only emprove with age. Live for my fun and interesting job and of course my gem Trevor who will grow up to b an amazing man. Not like some guys out there… no players here, my page is a dog-free zone! Only real men write to me. I also like to get in touch with women who are adventurous… you know what I mean. The

This women is 41, has a son old enough to check out whether his mommy has a Myspace profile. She lives in Canada and is lookin for pussy on myspace. I find this funny. I would hate to look up my mom on Myspace at a friend’s house and find this, not because she can’t spell, but because she’s airing her dirty laundry and cooter for everyone to see. So her her last bf cheated on her and now she’s into girls, what a fucking cliche, did she learn how do deal with her emotions by watching an afterschool special. Do those still exist? I think they are the reason I have had unprotected sex and smoked rock, I used to watch them when I was 10, they taught me so much, like how to roll a joint and ruin a family.

Posted in:MySpace|Slut|teenage mom|Unsorted

2006

Jan

Myspace Challenge

No Comments »

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I decided that I am worthless. Nothing without a lot of myspace friends. I have 800 now, but want 100,000. Like all those slutty webcam whores. I may not be a hot bitch, but I deserve myspace love too.

So check out my ghetto profile, Add Me, and don’t expect me to message you or leave comments, cuz I am too lazy for that shit.

If you are a hot girl – I will probably ask you for nude pics.

The goal is 100,000 friends.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW MY PROFILE

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
Drunkenstepfahter.com

Posted in:challenge|MySpace|Unsorted