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Archive for the Towel Category

2009

09

Mar

Jordan in Her Towel Bikini of the Day

So exhibitionist, successful slut, borderline prostitute, with the dumbest set of fake tits, and the ability to pretty much attach her name to any useless product, was out at the beach, but instead of being half naked and sucking on a set of testicles while getting her pussy licked, like you’d expect the whore to be, at least based on her shitty sex tape that hit years ago, she’s wearing a couple towels and covering up more than a Muslim chick or that pilgrim lookin’orthodox jew I saw outside with her 8 kids the other day and who I asked if she would come over to host my thanksgiving party where we pretend to rape and pilage natives, but she just ignored me, I guess her religion raped and pilaged her vagina enough to not have a sense of humor, but maybe it was just because she’s not allowed to communicate with non jews since we’re heathans, but more likely it’s just that it wasn’t funny and I should have gone with my horse and buggy joke instead.

Either way, I wish some bitches took Jordan’s lead and wrapped the fuck up when it came to bikini time, I’m talking to you fat chicks.

I guess Jodan not happy with how her body’s looking, and here she is doin some stretchin….before a work out to tighten shit up…

Posted in:Beach|Bikini|Jogging|Jordan|Stretching|Towel

2008

12

Jun

Mariah Carey and Her Assistant Tend to Her Cunty Sore Back of the Day

It’s so typical that the half white girl would treat the all black husband as her fucking slave because white people are the devil. It makes things worse when you’re a younger dude and your wife is some kind of diva bitch who things the world works for her, making you the first officer in serving her cunt self.

These are pictures of Mariah Carey’s old weathered body beat up on set because she probably had to swim a lap, or throw a volleyball and now bitch is crying like she broke something because that’s why cunty spoiled brats do. The good news for her is that her bitch, fulltime personal assistant and husband is there to help her out, because it’s not like he’s got his own shit to do.

This job would be like winning the fuckin’ lottery after signing an agreement with the devil, taking you out of your poverty ridden shithole life, and bringing you to the life of luxury with the woman you lusted after when you were a teenager, and it all sounds pretty good, but within a year, you’ll be hanging from the rafters in your attic of your multi-million dollar home after killing youself because you just can’t take her shit anymore, so getting up into this shit when you’ve got your own money and hot younger bitches lined up is beyond me, but maybe Nick Cannon is a good little black kid who respects and serves his woman cuz his mom was an over-bearing Jesus freak in the projects.

I really don’t know, but I do know that his life with Mariah, despite all the superficial goodness seems like it’s just the worst job of his career and every minute of it fuckin’ sucks, even when jerking off to her while she’s asleep because she’s too tired doing nothing all day to put out.

Posted in:Back|Mariah Carey|Towel