I don’t really know what to think about the way mainstream media is going. I really don’t care. I am not one of those annoying motherfuckers who talks about that kind of shit because I hate people who try to talk all smart about current events and the state of the nation and shit, no one really cares what you think, so just show me your tits, bitch. The hippies at PETA decided to do a spoof on Girls Gone Wild, where the drunken bitches flash their udders. It’s a little distrubing, only because it turned me on, and I sleep with a cow of a woman everynight, so now I want to dress her up like a cow. Thanks Peta for opening me up to this fucked up fetish I never knew I had. Hippies have done so much for me.

See Banned Ad Campaign Here

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I was talking to someone local who has had his picture taken by Merlin Bronques when he was first starting out in Montreal. Now he’s rockin’ sundance, magazine spreads and ad campaigns, but he’ll always be a bald black “Lady” in the night to me.

I have only been in this city for less than 5 years and I was never much of a club kid, considering I was 30 and a washed up addict when I got here, oh and was was all smitten with my fresh marriage to a 300 pound women, that was clearly something I had always wanted for myself as a little wrestler in the orphanage, I’d tell my priest/coach “Pablo, one day I will go to Canada and marry the fattest bitch I can find”. So, whenever I could get away from the wife, I would spend my nights in the strip clubs and in the later years of Montreal, I’ve been busy working at the canning factory. Now that I am two months unemployed, there’s no way for me to afford going out and more importantly I rarely shower or do laundry and clubs just won’t let me in.

The plan is to just stick to the bottle and the gutter outside my house, if you can even call it a fucking house, but this isn’t about me, this is about Perez Hilton from PageSixSixSix and PerezHilton blog fame, motherfucker is chillin’ at that Tiger shoe house with A-listers Jack Osborne, Lizzie Grubman and Corey Feldman. You’ve fucking made it, you fruit boot wearing celebrity fucking homo, I’d rim your ass all night to get a link on your real successful piece of shit celebrity blog. Maybe one day I’ll invite you and trent and justjared and cityrag and socialitelife and defamer and gawker and idontlikeyouthatway and wwtdd and I don’t know who the fuck else has a celebrity blog, but those cunts are invited too, invited to what you ask?? To suck my limp dick, I’m impotent fuck.

With Love,
Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Check out the Onitsuka Tiger House Party at Sundance Gallery Here

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Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

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I don’t care abouyt Mariah Carey’s weight gain as much as I cared about her breakdown a couple years ago. The reason is that all american bitches are fat, they eat too much junk food and fast food and fucking refried beans. So Mariah still being bold enough to rock an bikini is cool with me. It’s not like I have any control over what the fat bitch does, otherwise I’d keep her away from the dessert tray. Being fat is bad for your image. I got a fat wife, I’m fat and when the yuppie parent’s of my stepdaughter’s friends come by, they look at us in disgust. I am usually rockin a mustard stain and I smell like urine, but I think they just hate fat people. The point of all this is to say, when Mariah was committed, they jacked her up on all kinds of drugs and a vulnerable, unstable bitch is a lot fucking sexier than some bitch that sings love songs with Busta Rhymes. RIP Motherfucker.

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I don’t care abouyt Mariah Carey’s weight gain as much as I cared about her breakdown a couple years ago. The reason is that all american bitches are fat, they eat too much junk food and fast food and fucking refried beans. So Mariah still being bold enough to rock an bikini is cool with me. It’s not like I have any control over what the fat bitch does, otherwise I’d keep her away from the dessert tray. Being fat is bad for your image. I got a fat wife, I’m fat and when the yuppie parent’s of my stepdaughter’s friends come by, they look at us in disgust. I am usually rockin a mustard stain and I smell like urine, but I think they just hate fat people. The point of all this is to say, when Mariah was committed, they jacked her up on all kinds of drugs and a vulnerable, unstable bitch is a lot fucking sexier than some bitch that sings love songs with Busta Rhymes. RIP Motherfucker.

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Kylie had breast cancer or some shit – but the good thing for me is that the chemo didn’t destroy her ass. I am used to cancer patients being all pastey and pale, skinny and bald, not the kind of person you’d want to do the locomotion with, but for some reason Kylie doesn’t look ravaged by the horrible disease. I don’t want you all thinking I got no sympathy for cancer, my prostate is the size of a grapefruit and I cough up blood daily. I just call it signs of hard living, and who really wants to live a pussy life in a sterile room anyway. I’m talking give me booze, smoke, unprotected sex and drugs and I’m a happy motherfucker. If you are wondering why I put the last pic in, it’s for the gay/closet cases that read this site. Speedo’s are hot, just admit it, homo.

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