I have some funny Meth stories about kids around here who used to smoke it in the park. They used to grind down lightbulbs using their skateboard grip tape until there was a little hole. Then they would smash out the black glass and the bottom of the bulb and pull out the element that makes the light bulb work. Then they would smoke the shit. I’d see them about 6 months later, a lot skinnier and sickly with their eyes buggin out of their heads. Talking to them was always funny because they were convinced that they were insanely productive and didn’t need sleep. They would brag about how they were up for 8 days and keeping busy. They’d lecture me on being a lazy pig cuz I would pass out drunk in front of them and they ran around in circles with all this fucking nervous energy until they got their next hit for the pipe. It was kinda sad but a lot a lot more annoying, because I hate high anxiety people. I can’t think of any of those funny stories of the meth kids, but I know they are in here.

In the meantime, check out Fergie from TRL. I have heard nothing but good things about this drug and Fergie is proof that it doesn’t ruin your life. She may look like a busted up tranny with AIDs but you all wanted to fuck her last year so fuck you for changing your tune. Homo.

PS – Two Finger Rings are Gangster and Peace Signs are Gay

PPS – I forgot what my PPS was going to be. But it probably had to do with me telling you to go fuck yourself and such…

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I met Nicole Richie once. I am not writing this to sound like I am a celebrity fucker or to say that I’m so hooked up or cool. Because let’s face it, there’s nothing cool about Nicole Richie and if I was hooked up, I wouldn’t be typing this shit to you. It was all just a big mistake that ended up with me and her being carted around with her bodyguards.

In the beginning of her Simple Life career, when she was a recovering heroin addict who replaced the heroin with donuts, because addicts always replace one addiction with another, and her addiction then was eating and now it’s not eating or over exercising, but that’s not what I wanted to get at because I am not some kind of psychoanalyst.

I wanted to say that she was edited proper on the Simple Life show and they made the world think she was a funny and reckless person who pranked everyone she came across. She was the funny fat girl who had her brain going for her and nothing else. After meeting her last summer, I realized that shit’s all a lie and that the producers of the show are fucking with all of us. She’s exactly what you think she’d be… a fucking retarded ditzy piece of shit. I am not going to lie, when the promoters mistakenly thought I was DJ AM and Nicole Richie’s Montreal friend, I liked the free cocktails they kept handing me. But everytime I tried striking up conversation with the slut, she looked back at me with empty and confused eyes like I was speaking to her in another language while dressed like a clown and dancing a jig. If you don’t get what I am talking about here, I am talking about the way a 20 year old sexually frustrated retarded person looks at a girl in a bathing suit at the public pool on a hot summer day….I’m talking public masturbation and awe, cuz that’s just what retards do. I remember telling a retard on a work program I was part of that one of the girls had a nipple ring and they caught him in the entrance rubbing on out to her “employee of the month” picture.

Either way, she was well on her way to skinny and she looked hot and still does. She just takes a bad picture. I admit have no standards, but think that you’re ugly so figure that one out….

Speaking of Ugly, here is MUNG’s best post to date. I actually read it. I don’t agree with what he’s saying and think that calling her too skinny is played out but you guys can decide. The other thing I have to say is that Tim Horton’s is a coffee shop and a double double is redneck Canadian for 2 milks and 2 sugars. Just sorting it out. Now here’s MUNG.

Nicole Richie makes me sick. Now, when I am talking about sick, I mean throwing up bile and blood, and shitting liquid out of my anus. I swear I saw her on Sunday morning sitting in a pile of sand with flies buzzing around her eyelids while Alex Trebek and Sally Strothers were telling me that “for the price of a cup of coffee per day, I could help support the starving in Africa”.

You know what?… I would rather let this bitch die while I sip on a large double/double from Tim Horton’s. Who the fuck does she think she is, getting d-list celebrities to ask me for money to help save her. I hope the flies eat her, and her body starts eating her stomach lining and when she dies from starvation I will use her bones as windchimes in my backyard.

I don’t have a backyard, but a motherfucker can dream can’t he???

Fuck this stupid bitch and the horse she rode in on.

Now go fuck off.

MUNG

These are pics from the Estee Lauder Event Yesterday Afternoon

These are pics from the Teen Vogue Event Last Night

These are pics from 2 days ago

And These are pics Mung Sent in from God Knows When….

Remember Ladies… Put that burger/cake/tub of ice cream cuz your sad – down….There’s no such thing as too skinny….

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Paris Hilton hates me. I and I hate my links and I havn’t been getting fan mail. I can only assume you are getting bored of this repetitive site. I know I am.

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This just in…. Drew Barrymore goes to the gym because she’s a fat dumpy bitch. And this has been my shortest post ever.

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Has this bitch hit the USA yet? Some dude sent me the album months ago and since I don’t have a TV, I’ll never know. I think a lot of ppl are listening to her shitty music and she’s becoming famous and making money. That upsets me. I know that this heffer is just going to get bigger and bigger, until her head is too big for her fat ass, but that’ll take a while considering her ass has a pretty healthy head start.

I am happy that she’s the type of person who is so fucking busted that no one bother’s asking her for an autograph or stops to say hello or freaks out screaming like she was New Kids on the Block in China back in ’90, because I hate her. The only person who actually gives her any attention is some Paparazzi motherfucker who is just trying to make some money for the day to buy his baby some formula, and she’s the only famous person around, and this cunt is giving him the finger. I guess she wants to pretend that she’s so annoyed of the constant harassment in trying to save celebrity face. It’s would probably work against her to show her real excitement, like a kid who’s just been reunited with his deadbeat dad after he ran out on the family 20 years ago. Or like when you land a pussy and bring her home, you can jump up and down thanking god for making this happen, but the second bitch sees that, she’ll be fucking her way out your front door and to some other booty call’s house.

If you are wondering why I hate her, it is because she’s too ugly to be successful and like all fat bitches pretending to be wanted by all the boys and how she rejects them, or publically saying her ex boyfriend who cheated on her’s got a small dick, in her songs is all very transparent. She’s just a sad fat ugly girl no one ever noticed and the only guy she ever got was with her cuz she was a better option than rubbing one out. All he had to do was call and pretend that he cared.

I have written too much on this whore.

Here She is Dressed Like a Clown…

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I was talking to some girl from Singapore who reads this site…this is the conversation and she’s got nothing to do with the girl in the above picture…

Her:

do you know how many ppl complain when i refer them to your site
they tell me like trash ppl like you should be dead
cause you think your dirty words make you sophisticated
when it doesnt

Me:

what are you talking about?
when have i ever said i am sophisticated
you’re just a bunch of immigrants who don’t get what’s up

Her:

immigrants from?

Me:

not north american or europe
your part of the world is not for me
you aren’t even human to me

Her:

thanks alot

Me:

the way you speak the english language, the music you listen to, everything you do is so immigrant.

Her:

Bye

That was boring and so are these links…

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I am trying to get into the shower so I can go outside for a bit. I need to wash because I can smell my ass as I type this and that is gross even though I love my stink. Winter is going to be here soon and I wasted my whole summer trying to make myself famous with this site. Too much computer is the devil.

Then these Steven Tyler and his slut pictures made their way into my inbox and I had to post them. I hate Aerosmith, but anyone who rock’s those pants with a young bitch by his side has got to be a rockstar. I consider most people who have the balls to dress like fools to be rockstars, like the homeless dude down the street from me who wears a Year 2000 Gold Top Hat every fucking day. I always tell him he’s a star. Steven Tyler is actually a rockstar though. Now look at the pics and deal with this shitty post. I haven’t eaten yet because of you.

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