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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2006

10

Jan

WWF Softcore

I fucking hate wresting, more than I hate you. It drives me crazy and always had. I was convinced that all the people I knew who watched it, were closet case homos. Where is the entertainment value in watching topless muscular men in panties grabbin’ at each other if you’re not a fuckin’ fag. I came across these screen shots from last night’s “RAW” and I guess all the homophobe closet cases needed to “STRAIGHTEN” out their “sport” so they decided to have softcore sex interludes in a bed set up in the ring. Dude, if that’s not like the highschool quarterback dating the head cheerleader while fuckin his teammates up the ass in the locker room. I don’t know what is.

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2006

10

Jan

Jessica Alba Topless

Yeah – so this is a little misleading, she’s tanning on the beach and she’s taken off her top. I have no problem with girls goin topless at the beach, and unlike you seeing a naked chick isn’t that exciting to me – the reason is simple. I spent days and days in strip clubs, with hookers, and my drinking has just made me numb. But when I see pics of Alba almost topless – I got no choice but to represent – because she is the hottest girl in hollywood. If I was smart – I woulda married her mom.

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2006

10

Jan

Britney in Vegas

I have no idea if these are old pics or new pics of Britney. To me she always looks the same. I feel like I have seen her in some ghetto beater without a bra and joggin pants, but that’s probably because she wears the same thing daily. I am not about to rip into her hygiene, like all the other sites used to do, cuz it’s old news. I just feel the need to post a Britney erect nipple whenever I can – to prove that bitch doesn’t have implants. Baby or not, her nips have always aimed to the ground. Implants don’t do that. I like her rehab shirt, classy, I wonder what flea market she bought that at. I wish my mom wore Rehab shirts, but she is dead. I kinda wish bitch really had a drug addiction and gave birth to a flipper baby, it would have been funny, but only for some people.

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2006

10

Jan

My First Goatse

I figure that my site doesn’t represent internet culture enough. I never post the mainstream viral videos like that fat kid with a light sabre. I never talk about Goatse and since this is an internet site I figure I will post this for all your internet people. I am not going to dis you for your inability to get pussy or make real friends, I am online right now too, we’re all in the same boat, only I have a legitimate excuse called laziness.

Follow this link to see more pics of people seeing Goatse for the first time.

THIS LINK

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2006

06

Jan

2006 Bloggies

I deserve a Bloggie – mainly because It would piss so many people off. But I also want to win because it would be funny to crash the bloggie parties. I doubt these bitches know much beyond how to write a post. I’m talking bringing a crackwhore as a date and shaking the bloggie host’s hand with her crackwhore orgasm drippin off my fingers.

It would be funny and anyone who reads this site knows that I am all a lot better than all those fucking loser bloggers. I know that isn’t saying much, but I still want to go on a quest and make DrunkenStepfather winner.

Vote for me HERE

I may kill myself if I don’t get nominated. Yes, I am that emotionally unstable.

Oh – I just read the site and realized that the prize is $20. Fuck that. Don’t vote for me. I’d rather lose than be recognized by a bunch of internet losers and handed 20 dollars from them. Seriously. Do not vote for me. Just look at that picture, dude’s wearing red pants. That’s all I have to say.

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2006

06

Jan

Marisa Tomei's Wet Shorts

I used to have a weird fetish growing up – that involved wet clothing. I never really understood what did it for me, but when a girl happened to get stuck in a rainstorm in a white t-shirt without an umberella – I’d be happier that you were the first time you got a hand job from the Albino chick in your highschool. I aint got shit against albino’s cuz another fetish of mine growing up was Red Eyes. It’s like fucking a dragon and I always get off to dragons. The point of this post is to say that although I had that wet clothing fetish – there is absolutely nothing hot about Tomei’s wet shorts. I guess she’s just past her prime and it’s not “My Cousin Vinny” anymore, and by that I mean, her ass isn’t all that.

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2006

06

Jan

Marisa Tomei’s Wet Shorts

I used to have a weird fetish growing up – that involved wet clothing. I never really understood what did it for me, but when a girl happened to get stuck in a rainstorm in a white t-shirt without an umberella – I’d be happier that you were the first time you got a hand job from the Albino chick in your highschool. I aint got shit against albino’s cuz another fetish of mine growing up was Red Eyes. It’s like fucking a dragon and I always get off to dragons. The point of this post is to say that although I had that wet clothing fetish – there is absolutely nothing hot about Tomei’s wet shorts. I guess she’s just past her prime and it’s not “My Cousin Vinny” anymore, and by that I mean, her ass isn’t all that.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

06

Jan

T-Shirt of the Day

After listening to DJ Am’s sets, it comes as no surprise that he’s Jewish. Horrible Memories of the days I worked for that Bar Mitzvah company rape my brain; me with a mop in the back room waiting for all the little rich kids to finish dancing and eating their catered food, so I could clean up and go home. If I was lucky, I’d get to come out after one of those fucks threw up from riding the mechanical bull too hard or over-eating at the Ben and Jerry’s cart. I always liked when that happened, cuz all these little fuckers would jump at me and laugh at me for being the hired help. It was probably one of the high points in my working life. It’s never humiliatng when you are getting paid 5 dollars an hour to get shit on by 12 year old rich kids. Point of the story is that I never do Celebrity Clothing of the Day, AM’s made the cut with this shit because it’s hype.

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2006

06

Jan

Jordan On The Beach

Jordan is crazy, she has the biggest tits in d-list celebrity world. Don’t quote me on that – because I am pretty useless when it comes to guaging tit size and I don’t know what constitutes being a D-Lister. I like to think I am an D-list internet celebrity, but that’s just my ego talking. I do know that I used to run around with a stripper bitch who had bigger tits than Jordan, but she was pretty low class, had a couple teeth missing and her body wasn’t as tight. She kinda smelled like bolgna slices and cheese whiz, I haven’t really figured out where I am going with this story…I lose track of things pretty quickly. Enjoy Jordan’s Tits.

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2006

06

Jan

Street Art of the Day

I don’t know who Jack is – but this is the kind of Street Art I like. I sent it to Wooster Collective to see if DrunkenStepfather.com is “Down” enough to get a plug on their site. I have a feeling they want legit art – but who’s to say Jack isn’t a real artist, maybe this is some next level Grafitti. Either way – when I saw this – I laughed and it is a DrunkenStepfather.com original photo. I know. I am very talented.

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