You know how we feel about the fleshlight, we think it’s a tool for perverts and people with a major masturbation addiction. We know that not everyone is as charming as they would like to be. They have trouble scoring the real ladies so turning to a rubber vagina is the clear option. It seems like the fleshlight is also a tool for couples, or men pretending to be women. Here is the post of the day:

Read the post after the jump…it’s funny….but don’t take my word for it.

It’s Been A While Since I’ve Been Here… Wanted To Share Our “FUN” We Had Last Nite, With The Pink Lady. Before I Get Started, I’m A Big Fan Of Watching & Listening. Sometimes, I’d Rather “Watch” Him Play, Then Do Anything Else. It’s A Huge Turn On For Me. Call Me Weird.. Last Nite We Were Laying On The Couch Watching TV, I Got Up To Use The Bathroom, Came Back – And He Was Nakid. He Smiled At Me, And Reached Down, And Held Up “Her”. Smiling, I Sat Down On The Other End Of The Couch, And Started Watching Him. He Was Rubbing Just The Head Of His Cock, Across Her Lips, And Looking At Me. Like I Said Before, That Drives Me Crazy.. So, It Didn’t Take Too Long To Get Me Excited.

I Layed Back, I Had A Skirt On, No Panties.. And Started Rubbing. He Had A Nice View Of Me, And Started Rubbing “Her” Faster, Making That Wet Sound I Love. I Told Him To Start Fukin It Hard, So He Slid His Cock Inside Her, And Pumped Away For A Few Minutes, Moaning. Finally, He Said He Wanted The Real Thing, I Was More Than Happy To Oblige. We Got Down On The Floor, Facing The Couch, He Got Behind Me. And Slowly Slid His Hard Cock In, It Felt Soo Good As He Was Fukin Me Hard.

I Reached Up And Grabbed “HER” Off The Couch, And Put It Between My Legs, And Told Him To Fuck Us Both. He Slid His Cock Out, And Started Fukin Her For A Little Bit, Then Pulled Out, And Did Me. 10 Minutes Later, I Had An Unbelievable Orgasm, And He Was Ready To Blow. I Held “HER” Really Tight Underneath Me, And Told Him To Cum, He Was Pumping Away, And Started Moaning As He Came Inside Her, Filling Her Up. Then I Layed On The Floor, And He Let It Run Out Into My Mouth…. MMMM………. Very Fun Evening!!

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I have always said – why save costumes for Halloweeen. This shit should be everyday. I could make a commentary on today’s costume, but what’s the point, it’s obvious you only come to the site for the celeb content…fuck you.

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I am not a political person, I am a poor Mexican living in Canada, I really have no need to worry about the government. I am neither a hater or lover of George Bush. The only thing I really care about when it comes to his stint in office is his slutty daughter Jenna the drunken coke whore and her cousin Lauren the exhibitionist. Here’s a picture of a Lauren Bush nip slip. Notice her hairy arms – she’s like a little chinchilla those things are so cute….

A couple different shots – after the jump

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This shirt is famous. It was on the cover of the N.E.R.D album. It reminds me of the Tuxedo shirt, which we all know is probably the most obnoxious shirt of all time. This one’s a little more hype with the tie guitar, because we all know that most corporate fuckers have a wild side, and I am not just talking about how they fuck whores, their secretaries and do a lot of coke….I am talking “rockin out” while they drive their expensive luxury cars to work….motherfuckers.

This shirt’s by Ryan McGinness, don’t say I never hook you fuckers up.

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All the attention has been on Britney lately, I completely understand the obsession. When she first launched her career, everything was going her way. She was young, energetic and successful. Her music was shitty, but the fans kept coming back for more. I remember being excited for her demise, telling friends that I couldn’t wait for her to start doing porn after her career fell apart. The demise is here, and the media is obsessed. In all the chaos, no one took the time to address these pictures of Jamie Lynn, Britney’s younger, potential statutory rape charge, sister.

Check out the pics, this 14 year old’s got it going on….

More after the jump

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There is nothing like a big clit that looks like a dick. Well, actually there is…I like to call it a normal sized clit that looks like a pea. I have a fat wife. Her vagina is an impenetrable of fat. I haven’t seen her clit since we’ve been married, but rumor is that she does have one….when we first got together, I used to feel like a miner – digging for motherfucking gold. Now that we are married, we just don’t do the whole sex thing. You know how it is. Let’s go ladies – let’s enlarge yo’ clits!

Clitoral vacuum cylinders offer intense stimulation and growth potential.
Main features:
Enlarge your clit
For suction play — enjoy the pleasurable vacuum sensation
Temporarily enhances sensitivity for improved sexual play and masturbation
Great punishment tool when used at high pressure levels
How it works:
With proper use you can enlarge and stimulate your clit using our high tech vacuum pump. They utilize the same concept as traditional penis pumps, which have been effective in enlarging penis size, now you can enlarge your clitorus size. The pair of cylinders is crafted from industrial grade clear acrylic. Uses the same airlock release system as in our penis pumps. A dual “T” connecter is recommend to enlarge both nipples evenly and to insure constant pressure.(See pump below)

Enjoy watching your clit grow with proper use. Pumping your clit enhance it’s sensitivity and can be a lot of fun for sexual play and masturbation. Clit cylinders can also be used to create great stimulation or punishment with higher pressure levels.

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I don’t watch TV, I can’t afford one, but this was sent in to us by a reader and it’s fucking hot. Nothing like a fake titty nip slip on a d-list celeb….

Campins busts out of oblivion
By Inside Track
Tuesday, March 29, 2005 – Updated: 11:11 AM EST

KATRINA CAMPINS of “The Apprentice” fame suffered a Janet Jackson-like wardrobe malfunction the other day while strutting the catwalk for designer Tommy Hilfiger in Miami Beach at the Funkshion Fashion Week finale. Katrina, wearing a striped white and black blazer with no cammie, flashed a fake mammary to the crowd and then tried to hold it together for the rest of the show. Apparently, a Tommy Girl neglected to tell the Apprentice wash-out about the all-important double-sided tape!

Thanks to some pretty amazing readers, I got the pics. I love you all.

Check them out, After the Jump:

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Some people have yellow fever and only sleep with asians. Other people have jungle fever and only sleep with black people. A few people have taco fever and only sleep with Mexicans. I have vagina fever, and do not discriminate my pussy. In a world that is so culturally diverse, who am I to not embrace each sweet smelling conch of life without open arms and erect penis. I know I am impotent, but we are all allowed to dream, this is the internet.

This shirts is for the Jew lovers out there…..

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We saw Pamela Anderson in Saran Wrap yesterday and we determined she’s a dirtbag. We realize her hepatitis is lethal and that she got it from fucking lots of dirty rockers, but we can pretend it’s from a tattoo, we don’t mind. We think she’s washed up, used and abused and looks as good as any stripper with 20 years experience and coke addiction under her belt….the point of this story is that Pam went to the beach with her kids in a shirt that showed her nipples. Always a fine example of a well-rounded home….

More Pics After The Jump

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I don’t believe in using condoms. I have always said that condoms are for pussies, and if you aren’t willing to take risks in life, you don’t deserve to live. I have slept with numerous hookers and dirty sluts alike, and if they ever had the nerve to ask me to strap-up, I would smack them upside the head like I was their pimp. This little invention is a belt that your condom attaches to, it’s probably the dumbest thing I have ever seen, but if people are willing to use it big up. I can picture the sexual encounter now….one second baby….I just need to put my condom belt on, because using a condom alone doesn’t kill the mood enough. If you are this scared of fucking, maybe you need to re-consider your place in life, join the fucking church or something. On that note….collar up!!!

The primary purpose of a collar is to help prevent unwanted pregnancies and the spread of venereal disease. The secondary purpose is to assist in sexual satisfaction by preventing premature ejaculation. It goes on easy and fast and when it’s on, you won’t even realize that it’s there. Both men and women love the results they experience while using a collar and, no doubt, it’s a male contraceptive’s best friend!

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