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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

03

Aug

I am – Throwback Topless Samantha Fox of the Day

1 Comment »

Samantha Fox

Yesterday I got in a street fight with one of those college cunts that stand around trying to get you to sign some worthless petition for animal rights, greenpeace, whatever. They usually come in pairs, work 5 hours for $2/hr, which means they have to be trust-fund fuckers from Connecticut who just didn't feel like the office internship daddy setup. Instead, they decided to work on their tan while boosting their resume with "humanitarian" bullshit, and use that hard earned 10 dollars for a cab back to their parents' city penthouse getaway.

I was on my way to the bank to cash my hooker-relapse check, when this blonde petition bitch says something about "Do you want to help Gay Rights?" I ignore her because i got places to go. Behind my back petition bitch mutters "Fine, Ignore me." I went into fuck you mode.

I told her "That's your job, to be ignored. I support gay rights by not voting for Republicans. I don't have time to sign your useless petition because i got rent to pay. And that comment behind my back was pretty fucking tactless." I stormed away and petition bitch was stunned. Pussies like her never expect people to fight back.

I was still angry and called my guy friend who works down the street and vented about that little twat. An hour later, he calls me back and said he dragged petition bitch behind a dumpster and raped her. I don't like rape jokes, but I liked that one.

Here is Samantha Fox being blonde like that petition bitch. This Brit is an old playmate from 1993, who got her 'modeling' career started at 16 in 1983 when her mom sent pictures she took of Samantha posing in lingerie on her bed to some newspaper. Classy (at least my mom didn't introduce me to my pimp). She had some sort of music career with a hit called "Touch Me, I want your Body." Now go touch yourself because you want her body the way it was back then so you can ram each and every opening with your virgin prick.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

Posted in:Samantha Fox|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

03

Aug

I am – Some Topless Model and Hating Life of the Day

2 Comments »

Aida

So I spent the all of yesterday and pretty much all of the evening trying to get my computer fixed as at one point during the day, it just shut off. After taking it to a tech guy I was informed that not only did the hard drive die, but I lost everything on my computer. I spent the rest of the day trying sort out all the log in stuff for the site as well as borrowing a computer from a friend.
Some friends stopped by around midnight, and thankfully dragged me out for a booze and drug filled night until 6AM, which some say is irresponsible, but at this point I really don’t give a fuck. My life was on that computer and now it is gone. All this situation did was confirm to me what I have known all along. I hate this world and everything in it.

So here’s some topless pictures of some chick named Aida something-or-other. In the end her last name doesn’t matter because it bares no effect on your wanking fantasies and habits, and I am way to hungover and frustrated with this site to care.

Our photos can’t be hosted on our server right now, so bear with the bullshit ads on the side for today.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez

Posted in:Topless|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

03

Aug

I am – Leelee Sobieski and Tricia Helfer in PVC of the Day

1 Comment »

LeeLee

After I lived with 1.5 legged Melanie in Community College, I roomed with the Queen Mother of fat sluts: picture Brooke Hogan plus 70 lbs and size A tits, crossed with Winnie the Pooh. Fucking Winnie the Pooh: she not only wore his face but covered her THREE QUARTERS of our room with Tigger and that shit. I think if I ever had a justifiable case for arsen, this would have been it, and no jury would convict me after meeting this bitch we’ll call “Cassie.”

Ahhh the cunt in Cassie. She would have three pretty hot guys over in one night for sloppy sex, sometimes they would be going as another was coming, and not seem to get it, or mind the other dude’s fresh wet spooge on her Pooh sheets. She wasn’t even getting paid, stupid bitch. She sex-xiled me constantly, which is fine because I had no desire to watch this slag come and fill the room with the smell of her fat steamy twat.

This borderline obese bitch reminded me that no matter how big and busted a chick is, she can nail a hot guy just by getting up in his face because guys are lazy. They don’t give a shit about the fatrolls hanging out of her backless shirt because the hot girl across the room = effort. Most will shove their cock in aggressive roadkill with tits as long as they don’t have to make the first move. What’s funny is that while they’re slamming fat Cassie’s size 18 ass in the bathroom stall, the hot girl from across the room is just as slutty and they could be pounding her if they had just got up and said “Hi, let’s fuck.” Joke’s on them. And the hot girl for being a pussy. And fat Cassie for simply being fat Cassie

Here is Leelee Sobieski in some PVC and fishnets not looking like fat Cassie, with the exception of the hair. The other chick is Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica) who’s usually smoke’n, but she looks like she has about 20 years and 20 rounds of Botox on Sobieski here. Now have fun trying to bust one over the only photo I could find of this tame hooker/S&M shoot with the girl from “Eyes Wide Shut” and her aging aunt.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE

Posted in:Leelee Sobiesky|Lingerie|Unsorted

2007

03

Aug

I am – stepUPDATE of the Day

No Comments »

Alright Ladies and Gents, were going to up and running very shortly. Do to matter beyond our control our photos cannot be hosted on our own server today, but will be hosted nonetheless.

Thanks for your patience, you’ll have some new stuff to read and photos to whack off to in no time!

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez

Posted in:Sucking|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – "Technical Difficulties 2: God Hates Us" of the Day

No Comments »

Sugar Nell here, we are going through all sorts of technical difficulties still. And Marie-Eve is doing her best to fix this shit since she is the brains behind the operation while hookers are playing slip ‘n slide on Jesus’ belly somewhere in China. She is running her tiny tight ass off trying to seduce geeks to fix this lil disaster of the day. We will have some nudity, bikinis, and starlets slutt’n it up as soon as possible, so keep checking back, because we love you like a cat loves its nip and are doing our best to please you little fuckers.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

<a href=”mailto:sugarnell@drunkenstepfather.com”> EMAIL ME HERE </a>

Posted in:Sucking|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – “Technical Difficulties 2: God Hates Us” of the Day

1 Comment »

Sugar Nell here, we are going through all sorts of technical difficulties still. And Marie-Eve is doing her best to fix this shit since she is the brains behind the operation while hookers are playing slip ‘n slide on Jesus’ belly somewhere in China. She is running her tiny tight ass off trying to seduce geeks to fix this lil disaster of the day. We will have some nudity, bikinis, and starlets slutt’n it up as soon as possible, so keep checking back, because we love you like a cat loves its nip and are doing our best to please you little fuckers.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

<a href=”mailto:sugarnell@drunkenstepfather.com”> EMAIL ME HERE </a>

Posted in:Sucking|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – Milla Jovovich Before the Knock Up of the Day

6 Comments »

Milla Jovovich

I found pictures of a knocked up Milla Jovovich which I thought were actually cute, but I didn’t post them because I know in your make believe world, all women are 110 pounds with DD tits and asses you can bounce quarters off, so I posted these ones I found instead, as not to be the person who shows you that reality is not the delusions of your own, sexless mind.

People talk a lot of shit about how pregnant ladies are hott, but that’s only for the first 4-5 months I would say, maybe less, when they have that cute little pregnant tummy, and the realization that they have no way out of this shit hasn’t quite sunk in yet. Once bitch starts blowing up, daddy-to-be suddenly looses interest in fucking her and pretty much touching her all together, but keeps telling her “You’re beautiful!!�.

This may come as a giant shock to some of you, but women know they are fat and ugly when they are pregnant, and telling them over and over that they are not, while you stare at 20 year olds walking down the street, only fucking makes it worse. So in the event you actually ever meet a real, live women (not the Realdoll you keep on your closet) and god forbid you impregnate her with your loser sperm, tell her what she already knows, “Honey, I still love you, but you are seriously fucking fat right now, and honestly, you disgust me. I will touch you again when you pop that kid out and head to the gym with the membership I will give you as a “gift�.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez


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Posted in:Milla Jovovich|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – Dannii Minogue Get'n Tight with a Chick of the Day

No Comments »

Dannii Minogue

Last night was my friend’s friend’s birthday, so i tagged along. It was a small group and we started at some Euro trash bar, where the guys were slim pickings. A decent specimen starts talking to the birthday girl, and I swagger over and butt in, because the bday girl is not my friend. He is some Israeli, and even though his accent annoyed me, the thought that he could kill me was hot, because all Israelis are commandos (they just are). We start grinding, and I can feel his hard cock on my thigh through his jeans. He wants a cigg break and I follow, which ends with us making out in front of the club. I was wearing a lacey tailored jacket with two buttons and nothing but a bra underneath for easy access since I am always thinking ahead. The bouncer tells us to move it to the alley. Before long he is feeling me up and massaging my tit, and the other hand is down my jeans, clutching my pantyless butt cheek. He keeps talking about going to his place, but in the light of the street lamps I realized I could do better. So I went back inside, found my friend, and we bounced to another club with the bday girl giving me the evil eye the whole time. Within 10 minutes I was making out with some NYU grad student when I realized I was missing one of the two buttons holding my top together. Oh well. I went home alone because my vagina is still aching from the weekend.

These pics of singer/model/sister (who gives a shit?) Dannii Minogue in the back of a car with some other chick halfway to feeling up her ass may leave you aching because you have girl on girl fantasies. Dannii was caught making out with a stripper giving her a lap dance on tape last year. So maybe your fantasies of Kylie’s sister aren’t so far off. Have fun virgins while I nurse my hangover.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE


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I am – Gemma Atkinson Almost Naked of the Day
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Posted in:Dannii Minogue|Girl on Girl|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – Dannii Minogue Get’n Tight with a Chick of the Day

6 Comments »

Dannii Minogue

Last night was my friend’s friend’s birthday, so i tagged along. It was a small group and we started at some Euro trash bar, where the guys were slim pickings. A decent specimen starts talking to the birthday girl, and I swagger over and butt in, because the bday girl is not my friend. He is some Israeli, and even though his accent annoyed me, the thought that he could kill me was hot, because all Israelis are commandos (they just are). We start grinding, and I can feel his hard cock on my thigh through his jeans. He wants a cigg break and I follow, which ends with us making out in front of the club. I was wearing a lacey tailored jacket with two buttons and nothing but a bra underneath for easy access since I am always thinking ahead. The bouncer tells us to move it to the alley. Before long he is feeling me up and massaging my tit, and the other hand is down my jeans, clutching my pantyless butt cheek. He keeps talking about going to his place, but in the light of the street lamps I realized I could do better. So I went back inside, found my friend, and we bounced to another club with the bday girl giving me the evil eye the whole time. Within 10 minutes I was making out with some NYU grad student when I realized I was missing one of the two buttons holding my top together. Oh well. I went home alone because my vagina is still aching from the weekend.

These pics of singer/model/sister (who gives a shit?) Dannii Minogue in the back of a car with some other chick halfway to feeling up her ass may leave you aching because you have girl on girl fantasies. Dannii was caught making out with a stripper giving her a lap dance on tape last year. So maybe your fantasies of Kylie’s sister aren’t so far off. Have fun virgins while I nurse my hangover.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE


Unrelated Posts

I am – Gemma Atkinson Almost Naked of the Day
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I am – Penelope Cruz in a Short Dress of the Day
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Posted in:Dannii Minogue|Girl on Girl|Unsorted

2007

02

Aug

I am – Natsuko Tatsuki and Jesus' Trip to a Chinese Brothel of the Day

No Comments »

Natsuko Tatsuki

I was talking to Jesus on the phone a few days ago, and since he was fairly drunk on whatever cheap booze he had found over in China on his trip, he had no problem telling me about his trip to a local brothel the day before while the ship was docked, cause you know, conversations like that are really appropriate to have with your 18 year old Stepdaughter, right?

Apparently Fatass was lucky enough to go see some China Whores, but obviously whined for ten minutes about not being able to get it up, cause even underage whores can’t make that fat piece of shit get even a minor chubby. He did seem generally happy that one of the girls took a bill from his hand with her pussy, which he said was “just like a coin slot.” My Stepfather, ladies and gentlemen. What a guy….

Here’s some pics of Natsuko Tatsuki. She’s Japanese and therefore not really relevant to what I just wrote, but you are a virgin who needs to take what he can get, wherever he can get it. So stop complaining and go grab your lotion before your Mommy calls you down for lunch.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez


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Posted in:Natsuko Tatsuki|Unsorted|Whore