DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

29

May

Doutzen Kroes for Gilles Bensimon of the Day

Doutzen Kroes dropped out of Victoria’s Secret, because I guess she had no choice, and they had an uprising at the company, where they realized it was time to replace the squad with a new line-up, that we can assume are younger, hotter, more affordable, and already social media stars to help market the cheap to market, low level, over priced, sweatshop made, quick to market, mall brand garbage that every girl wants to endorse, because it means a long lasting career, rich and famous lovers and husbands…and great PR…without really realizing they are just peddling garbage…

That said, Doutzen wants you to know that marrying a black man is not a nail in a coffin of her career, having two kids is not a nail in a coffin of her career, and getting fired from VS isn’t a nail in a coffin of her career…because people know her and want to see her naked…and photographers…like Gilles Bensimon…are there to take the pics…

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2015

29

May

Kate Upton’s Fat Ass on Set of the Day

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Kate Upton is on set of a movie…because I guess she’s figured out the way to look skinny, no, not wrapping herself aggressively in SPANX, something I am sure she already does…but rather connect with her creepy pervert fans through shitty romantic comedies…not because she has a passion for acting, or because she’s just trying to prove that acting doesn’t require talent, but because she knows the camera ads 10 – 20 pounds, so when people see her in person, they say in shock “I thought you were way fatter than this”…something that as a fat girl, she probably loves to hear…

That said, here’s her fat ass….in a pencil skirt…like a secretary..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kate Upton

2015

29

May

Josephine Skriver for Vanity Fair Italy of the Day

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Test tube baby Josephine Skriver proves yet again that genetically modified humans, unlike their food counterparts, are much more substantial and good to look at than regular in utero born babies…especially when those test tube babies are made from gay scientists and some lesbian…because they are raised to be fabulous, to look fabulous, to dress fabulous, and to get into modeling to be fabulous…the poster child for the experiment we can consider a success..all funded by Victoria’s Secret…

I’m a fan of this future technology. I need it for my basement, you know to give my captives friends that no one will notice are missing..

Posted in:Josephine Skriver

2015

29

May

Elisabeth Harnois Ass Crack of the Day

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Elisabeth Harnois is some CSI star and if I was some kind of low level editor at some mainstream publication – i would make a CSI related pun for the morons who read that shit…but instead I’ll stay within my wheelhouse of being a low level editor of what I guess is considered a blog, not quite a publication but not quite a Facebook page, and focus on how sloppy her ass is…not because I hate sloppy asses, I’ll jack my face up into any ass, while jacking myself off to any ass, only to realize that it’s not enough to turn my desensitized and possibly impotent thanks to diabetes dick…leading to me asking her to either start peeing, farting, or inserting random objects in herself to really appreciate the experience…

I’m sure this looks better in clothes.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Elisabeth Harnois

2015

29

May

Emilia Clarke for Marie Claire UK of the Day

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Emilia Clarke is on Game of Thrones or another one of those very successful, popular, shows that people everywhere are obsessed with but that I don’t care about because I can’t handle dragons, wizards and fantasy shit…I say leave that shit on college campuses where the virgin losers who you see have sword fights in the park create their sci-fi/fantasy swords…and where they congregate together…because without a club…they’d just be weird and alone…

I know, there’s nudity on the show…and rape scenes…but I prefer spending my time listening to my own failures…as she chokes on her fat neck next to me…

Either way, here’s Emilia Clarke in a magazine.

Posted in:Emilia Clarke

2015

29

May

Sam Cannon by Nat Lanyon of the Day

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Show NSFW Content

I don’t know who Sam Cannon and Nat Lanyon are, but does who they are really matter. This is a superficial world where we only just care about ourselves, that luckily has a need for nude and half nude content, since we’re all over exposed to the shit, sitting in front of screens all day, and have a need to never get enough of it, one of those never satisfied always looking for the next tit…as a general philosphy….

And the good news is that with that constant need for tit, there is a constant flow of talent willing to show their tits, in hopes to have a career as a model…thinking this is how to get it..

So who they are…doesn’t matter…what they are doing…does….

Posted in:NSFW|Sam Cannon

2015

29

May

Chubby Margot Robbie on Set of the Day

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Margot Robbie is some Australian who became a superstar thanks to Wolf of Wall Street….because she was naked in it and everyone freaked the fuck out over her…

As much as I hate on everything, I understood the hype, because she was fucking hot..and virtually unknown so that we didn’t have any of her real life bullshit to make us hate her for her personal life…. HERE IS THE CLIP …

But for some reason, a reason I call an Australian leaving Australia, and loving the fame and probably not fortune from that movie, that probably paid out in different ways, like rich men who wanted to get up inside her…she’s got chunky…

And now, she’s on set of Suicide Squad trying to touch her toes while she can, you know before her gut gets in the way, as it looks like it is going to do soon enough….but not quite yet.

The good news for her is that America loves fat chicks.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Margot Robbie

2015

29

May

Cruel Intentions Reunion Picture of the Day

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I don’t know why Sarah Michelle Gellar looks like she’s got a mouth full of nuts – getting ready to hibernate for the winter…in this Reese Witherspoon / Selma Blair Cruel intentions reunion…that is more a couple of girls running into each other in LA, because they all run in the same circles….

I also don’t know why the fat one from Cruel Intentions, who seduced and knocked up the main dude, ended up as the Oscar winning, billion dollar actress, while the other two just sort of fizzled out…

More importantly, I don’t know why I am posting Cruel Intention reunion that is hardly a reunion but may be a meeting to do the redux – thanks to craving money….considering I never even saw the original…

But I do know that virgin loser dudes everywhere love the shit, and more importantly that you’re virgin losers who love the shit, and I figure why not give you something you’re pathetic life can get excited about…

Posted in:Cruel Intentions

2015

29

May

Man Pushes Woman in Canal and Other Videos of the Day

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Woman Tasered in Reno

Fat Kid Freaks the Fuck Out…

Classroom Brawl

Theif of the Day

Fat Boy Fail…

Don’t Fuck with the Bouncer

Brazilian Foot Fetish video

Thief of the Day

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2015

29

May

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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My new favorite activity is home wrecking from afar..that’s homewrecking without even knowing the person you are homewrecking….you know getting couples to fight because the girls are sketchy and send me nudes…get busted…even though I’ve never met them…or in this case…know who they are…

It’s better than my failed pick-up lines….and here are some stepLINKS…in the Morning…

Neveryland Ranch for Sale for a Cool 100 Million…Small Price to Pay to Be Surrounded by the Ghosts of Loss of Innconce
GO

Girl in Bed…
GO

Singing Pussy
GO

Man Spreading is Against the Law…
GO

Rick Ross VS 50 cent is Hysterical
GO

Shanina Shaik in Lingerie
GO

Slut of the Day
GO

Bob Saget Does Fuller House
GO

the Most Haunted Places
GO

Fame Whore in a Bikini of the Day
GO

River Flood..
GO

Today in Birthdays
GO

Food Innovations We Need
GO

Mirror Selfies!
GO

Dan Bilzerian for President
GO

Slow Motion Explosive Oil Fire
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS