I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2014

17

Dec

Barbara Fialho for Marie Claire Australia of the Day

Her name is Barbara Fialho….which sounds like Vile Ho…which hits close to home…because every girl I’ve ever slept with has been a vile ho, but unfortunately, none of them looked anything like this….

All this nostalgia is making me want to drink my feelings into numbness…

Posted in:Barbara Fialho

2014

17

Dec

Porn Stars Read How The Grinch Stole Christmas

In what is probably the most boring way you’ll ever see a pornstar, unless of course you are into all things pornstar, and/or you really like Christmas, Dr Seuss, the Grinch or the fact that porn stars are reading….capable of reading…because you, like most people assume, they only know how to fuck on camera and suck dick, in efforts to make lots more money than if they followed their college Bachelor of Arts degree’s path to work at Starbucks..

Now, I don’t watch porn, but I am a festive motherfucker who loves Christmas…and I think that this, at least in some ways is genius, in other ways is boring as fuck, because I don’t have an attention span, but it should be turned into a drinking game that if you make it to the end of the video involves shooting yourself in the face…or even as a stand in parent to read your kids to sleep while you go to the stripclub to drink away your Christmas bonus….

All this to say, Pornstars reading may not be the future, maybe they should have been in Grinch costumes, acting it out with green dicks down’t their throats, but it happened…and it involved so many girls….so here is the Cast, in order of appearance:

Anikka Albright, Shyla Jennings, Carter Cruise, Dana Vespoli, Mercedes Carrera, Sara Luvv, Ashlyn Molloy, Cherie DeVille, Ryder Skye, AJ Applegate, Ariana Grand, Chanel Preston, Riley Reid, Bree Daniels, Eva Long, Adriana Chechik, Tiff Bannister, Jodi Taylor, Samantha Rone, Dakota Skye, Liv Aguilera, Alaina Kristar, Violet Monroe, Scarlet Red, Karla Kush…my god…there are so many of them…..

And now my post is officially as long as the video….

Posted in:Videos

2014

17

Dec

Lindsay Lohan for Love Magazine’s Advent Calendar of the Day

LOVE MAGAZINE ADVENT CALENDAR continues with even more amazing bottom feeding trash that most people forget exists, or don’t care exists, but are still huge names, and people want to see dancing around in totally non-christmas related dance….to non-christmas related song…in some peep show style show…like this one of Lindsay Lohan…who has awesome tits…is a still a huge star to me…and who I would get pregnant if I could, because I don’t mind the herpes or the pile of broken sadness that comes with being Lindsay Lohan…in fact that who Parents whoring her out for their personal gain, destroying her at her core, is exactly what I look for in long term opportunistic love…

Either, here’s her botox face being amazing….looking like some kind of Claymation Christmas miracle…that is only a Miracle because she’s still alive…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2014

17

Dec

Kid Richards Exclusive of the DAy

KID RICHARDS is what I like to call a genius film photographer from Portugal who is taking pretty interesting pictures of naked girls lit by weirdo fluorescent lights…that I think are amazing….but I could just be saying that because she is naked and I get sucked into things when they are naked….

The model is named Mariana. She’s pretty fantastic…but I could just be saying that because she is naked and I get sucked into things..when they are naked…but never the naked things I want to get sucked into, historically, all naked things I’ve been sucked into have been disgusting and I can’t escape.

Posted in:Kid Richards

2014

17

Dec

Victoria’s Secret Holiday Ad of the Day

The last thing I want to do in life is promote Victoria’s Secret. They are a billion dollar company, they aren’t paying me to promote their shit, they are just luring me in with tall model babes half naked in a Holiday ad, and I’m using it as masturbation fodder as they intended, and I hate being this weak…and giving into such a basic scam that has make many people rich…especially considering they haven’t evolved, their styling is shit, and bores me, and they have this potentially nude models, not nude, as to not offend their Christian audience…you know following dated bullshit regulations…opening the door up for a better version of Victoria’s Secret…that’s actually cool, racy, fun and sexy, but until then..here’s their commercial…which is like their infomercial fashion show…totally for the sake of selling product…using amazing girls…the best/worst ever.

Posted in:Victoria's Secret

2014

17

Dec

Selena Gomez Does Instagram of the Day

I have no idea why I am posting a Selena Gomez instagram round-up, like I fucking care about Selena Gomez, her LUPUS or the fact that she had Justin Bieber inside her when he was underage, like some kind of sex offender…

I mean, I am totally, one hundred percent confident in the fact that I don’t give a fuck about her or her probably breast implants…yet here I am….uploading pics of her like she matters to me…or really to anyone…

I just hope at least one of you is capable of jerking off to these pics…but I mean if you are…you’re probably already her fan…and you probably already have seen these since you follow her on instagram…unless you only like your instagram pics set to useless banter by a drunken asshole who didn’t get a blowjob last night even though he should have…becuase that’s what is supposed to happen when you’re in cocaine fueled 3 am dance parties in random crackhouses with a girl with great tits..

All this to say….here’s her instagram bullshit…that should be a sex tape…but proven everyday of my life…you can’t always get what you want.

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2014

17

Dec

Naked Woman Walks Down Street with Bucket on Head and Other Videos of the Day

Car Crash of the Day

Florida Bus Passenger of the Day

Citizen’s Arrest of a Drunk Driver

Weird Tattoo Circle

Man Knocks Out Cop

DJ of the Day

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2014

17

Dec

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

So a random 21 year old Tinder girl, who sent me unsolicited nude pics of herself messages me yesterday demanding I delete these unsolicited nudes and videos of her peeing, because she is “younger than I think”…in a clever scare tactic that once digging a little deeper turns out is a lie and that she just wants her nudes deleted because she found Jesus and is now a church goer…interesting…so Jesus likes liars but he doesn’t like unsolicited pee videos…good to know…but probably better to not send out that video…

Tis The Season…

A Bunch of Booty
GO

Lindsay Lohan and Her Sister
GO

Paris Hilton Panty Flash
GO

Christmas Caroling Prank
GO

Don’t Fuck with Alex Trebek
GO

15 Year Old Does Pink Floyd
GO

The First Trailer for the Final Season of Parks and Rec
GO

16 Times Walmart Gave Up
GO

Dog Gets a 3D Printed Leg
GO

Bill Cosby Tried to KIss Kathy Lee Gifford
GO

The Dad from Seventh Heaven Confesses to Molesting Three Underage Girls
GO

Top 100 Viral Videos
GO

Find the Best Porn EVER
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2014

16

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

Someone asked me what I do all day…to which I answered…that I sext…because that’s pretty much all this is…one giant sext that I’ve included you on…even though you don’t care…no one cares…that’s why my memoir is called “THIS CLOSE TO RELEVANCE”….right…

Here are some stepLINKS…

12 Things that will make you Say No Thanks to Christmas
GO

James Franco Movie – May Cause September 11th Level Attacks
GO

Pictures from a Woman’s POV
GO

Bridgit Mendler is Slutty in a Skimpy Summer Dress
GO

Kylie Jenner Shows Off Her Fat Kardashian Ass
GO

Ochocinco’s Tip is Amazing….
GO

Slut of the Day
GO

Wiz Khalifa Made a Sex Tape
GO

Jennifer Lawrence Tight Leggings
GO

Psycho Santa Scare Prank
GO

13 Ridiculous Chanukah Menorahs….
GO

Top 30 Hottest Jewish Women Under 40
GO

Kristen Stewart Busty….
GO

Brittany Daniel’s Booty Makes a Comeback
GO

Lindsay Lohan and Her Sister…
GO

Selena Gomez Hiding Her Face in the Airport
GO

Miranda Lambert’s a Country Music Ho in a Country Music Ho Dress
GO

Scary Spice is Single Again…
GO

Ariana Grande Being Carried…
GO

Girls in Bikinis
GO

Teens Play the Original Mega Man
GO

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Shopping
GO

Paris Hilton’s Push Up Bra is Funny of the DAy
GO

12 Awesome Professors
GO

Suicidal Christmas Dogs….
GO

Kim Kardashian Cropped Out Her Devil Child from a Pic
GO

Megan Fox Cameltoe
GO

World’s Best Trampoline Tricks
GO

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Ass in Jeans…
GO

Charli XCX Cheerleader Upskirt…
GO

Chuck Noris Epic Christmas Splits
GO

Lais Ribeiro for Victoria’s Secret
GO

Hilary Duff Cankles
GO

What a Panic Attack Feels Like
GO

Khloe Kardashian’s Ass on a Horse
GO

Chloe Sims Bikini Attention Whore
GO

Michelle Lewin Fat Ass in a Thong
GO

Girls Rocking Thigh Gap
GO

Rihanna is Puma’s Brand Ambassador
GO

Jon Hamm will not Play a Superhero
GO

Best Sports Vine on 2014
GO

16 Times Walmart Didn’t Give a Fuck
GO

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From stepSMUT!! VERY NSFW!
================

All 9s and dimes on cam…no seriously..
GO

Asian Works her Abs
GO

Hot Naked girl in the Kitchen
GO

Carlotta and her Shaved Pussy….
GO

Lesbians!
GO

Asian Girl Rubber Cock
GO

Find the Best Porn EVER
GO

Santa Slut of the Day
GO

Asian Bates
GO

Seriously Amazing Erotica
GO

Lara Stone Topless Outtakes
GO

Masturbates With a Hose
GO

Face Sitting in the UK
GO

Girls Getting Naked on Cam…For Free…Ok…
GO

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The Best Fucking Links Ever
GO

Celebrity Sex Tapes!
GO

My Official Instagram – FOLLOW Me Into the Darkness…..
GO

Follow #stepGIRLS on Facebook
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2014

16

Dec

Olivia Wilde Mom Pussy Slip of the Day

Olivia Wilde had a kid in April…this is her mom pussy the other day…in a bikini…that you know she’s showing off on purpose…like some kind of Animal kingdom baboon trying to get knocked up again…these hormonal women who crave male attention are like that…

All this to say, mom pussy is the fucking worst…amd HERE ARE THE REST OF THE PICS

Posted in:Olivia Wilde