DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

09

May

Sara Malakul Lane Breaks Instagram of the Day

Her name is SARA MALAKUL LANE and she’s amazing…

She’s a Thai superstar, which exists, because Thailand needs more than just lady boys, sex tourism, 7 year old hookers and ideal romantic settings for destination weddings…

She has come to America with her insane half Asian body, and has done more than just break records with her recent Netflix movie “Jailbait” that she gets totally naked in… SCREENSHOTS HERE ….

But she’s also breaking instagram with pictures like this…I mean what the fuck….this is amazing…I just got myself pregnant for mothers day.

Posted in:Sara Malakul Lane

2014

09

May

Maria Carey in Lingerie for Terry of the Day

No Comments »

People are excited about these Mariah Carey for Terry Richardson lingerie pics…but I’m not. I think she’s too old to be dressed like this, and not because she has kids, but because she’s old. I remember her being a babe int he 90s, this 20 years later, I just can’t commit to new Mariah, when I can google Old Mariah if I even really wanted any Mariah…

I also find Terry Richardson shots lazy…

Sure he has had great success, and has developed his own style, and has even taken some interesting pics, and I know he’s not the creep you’ve all grown to hate, because he came on some trick who was using him, even though there’s no evidence of it….face…it’s just so easy to blame when your whole fucking career you thought was going to happen didn’t happen…and last time I checked cumming on a willing girl’s face wasn’t rape…

But these pics, are just whatever…white wall, dumb bitch in lingerie, boring…like a cash grab for all involved and that’s disappointing…

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2014

09

May

Anastasia Kolganova Titties for Annabelle Magazine of the Day

No Comments »

Want to know what I like? Russian women, who have no souls, but who were able to escape a life of sex work, to do fashion work, all because they met a heigh requirement. Sure the model Russians with no souls are probably very expensive, even unaffordable for an average man to buy…and you can’t watch them piss on webcam for 10 dollars a minute…but they are still willing to do pretty much everything a sex worker would do…only in such a classier and thus more erotic way… I dig it.

Her name is Anastasia Kolganova…I don’t even know if she’s Russia, but her name is Russian enough, and these are her titties for fashion…

Posted in:Anastasia Kolganova

2014

09

May

Marlena Szoka Titties for Fashion of the Day

No Comments »

Marlena Szoka is a Polish model, and despite having a promising career at a Polish circus working with a bear that balances on a ball, she left the gypsy life, to get naked for fashion…

She’s tall, she’s got a hard face that looks like it has seen some shit, like her family being killed off in front of her, or something else equally communist and amazing…her tits are uneventful, but the fact that she’s showing them, with what looks like discomfort, makes the whole thing erotic…like it was a casting couch in a basement of a Polish meat plant, where her mom sent her at 14 to audition to get the family a better life…only now…as an established model who has done all kinds of high paying campaigns from Ralph Lauren to H&M…she’s makin’ way more money than working the factory, or whatever it is Polish people do other than circuses…

Posted in:Marlena Szoka

2014

09

May

Esmée Vermolen Hot for Marie Claire France of the Day

No Comments »

Esmée Vermolen is a French model who is breaking the French Bikini laws, that include but aren’t limited to – NO FUCKING BIKINI TOP…

But that doesn’t meant that these pics are bad, in fact, I hate 99 percent of bikini pics, not because I am gay, or into girls who are clothed, just because I’ve seen so many of them, and no one puts any real production into them. It’s like everything is as about as high concept and stimulating as a Victoria’s Secret catalog…which theoretically lost its purpose the second internet porn happened and you could jerk off to things other than an underwear catalog when your wife was at the park with the kids…

But I get it, it’s about the model, and this Esmée Vermolen and her sexy, exotic french name excites me, but mainly because french girls like anal on the first date, that doesn’t have to even be a date, but rather just an encounter…and encounter Esmée Vermolen and I need to have…

Posted in:Esmée Vermolen

2014

09

May

Aubrey O’Day’s Big Fake Titty on Her of the Day

No Comments »

I hate that find Aubrey O’Day hot…because I spent so many years making fun of her for being a fat idiot, with shitty fake tits, because I hate fake tits…but then she got fit, and all of a sudden, she seems relevant, fantastic and all that hatred I had for her turns into wanting to fuck the smell of all the black dick she’s had in her….with my mouth…

The sick thing in all that is that I am serious…

It’s like I hate fat girls so much that I can’t see past their fat, for the delicate flower that they are, but the second bitch stopes eating and starts posting shit like this on the internet, I fall in love…not that I love Aubrey O’Day, but I do love this…it’s like Aubrey O’Day, why are you so Pretty Today…oh right…tits…busting out of shirt you are tugging…

This is the formula girls. She’s mastered it.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day

2014

09

May

Jesse Jane and Some Other Trick Attention Seeking of the DAy

No Comments »

Jesse Jane is one the last living pornstars that I know of, not that she even does work anymore, I don’t really keep track of porn, but I know she’s was in it right before the crash of porn, when girls made actual money doing porn, built a fan base doing porn, back when porn wasn’t just some easy to digest bullshit made for the internet like it is now…

I am sure there will be a porn revolution, but while that happens, these old school porn girls are doing paparazzi pics,the way the no name bikini girls do paparazzi pics, and that’s jokes…but I’d rather see people who matter or who have a fan base being silly on the beach than some no name twat, so I support this behavior…

Posted in:Jesse Jane

2014

09

May

The Highlight of the Lindsay Lohan Deflated Pics – Her Labia of the Day

No Comments »

Lindsay Lohan’s labia is the kind of Labia that makes her deflated tits seem ok. Even though it looks deflated too. I guess that’s what happens when your spirits are down…

It’s the kind of labia I would write love songs to, at least for old time’s sake, because I feel sad for it…so I would but only do it from afar, because if you got too close, it may try to eat you up and destroy you from the inside, with an ebola like virus that may or may not be herpes…not that I even fear herpes, I just fear Lohan’s herpes, herpes I once wanted to have drip off my face, but now it’s just herpes I think should be contained to a pair of panties or a diaper while strapped to a bed in an insane asylum..

It’s a sad storyline, in theory, but in reality, bitch did it to herself, even if her parents destroyed her, because she’s an adult…I mean look at her vagina, it looks 73, and I don’t fall for the bad parent angle…and here’s her freckled back for instagram…

TO SEE THE REST OF HER PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2014

09

May

Bryden Jenkins is Amazing of the DAy

No Comments »

BRYDEN JENKINS is a babe I follow on Instagram. I know nothing about her, other than that she’s perfect, and that may be all I need to know…

She’s an up and coming model, she hasn’t made any real noise yet, at least with nude pics, but she probably makes a lot of money doing what she does, because unlike instagram models, with 100,000 followers, this girl’s gets work…she books campaigns and is amazing…

Sure, she doesn’t do enough fashion nudity…but she will…they all do, and both me and my penis are ready for it…

Magical creature, who I’d like to make into a mother for mother’s day…

Here’s a video

Posted in:BRYDEN Jenkins

2014

09

May

Selena Gomez Post Porn Shoot Pic of the DAy

No Comments »

In doing what I do, I’ve become friends with pornstars, I don’t even watch or like porn. but the girls are the easiest going girls who don’t care if you do posts on them, teasing them for being sluts, or sex addicts just trying to increase their hooker rates…they laugh about it, love the attention and are a lot of fun about it…I mean they put things in their pussies for money, they get what’s up…

So all the porn girls post these on set, after getting railed by 10 dick, pics, all slimy and beat up…

THe best is when they do the before and after pics, you know made up and dressed, to tear soaked eyes, smeared make-up, wet hair, and all the other good stuff that comes with having your face fucked…

This pic Selena posted, reminds me of that….and I like it…

TO SEE HER RIDICULOUS TITS IN A PUSH UP BRA CLICK HERE

Posted in:Selena Gomez