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2013

30

May

Courtney Stodden Strategic Topless Pics for E! of the Day

Courtney Stodden posed topless for E! because

1- she is going to be the next celebrity SEX TAPE star, since she’s already got the porn look, the tight teen body, the hard 40 year old face…she just hasn’t jumped into it fully yet, and I am okay with that strategy….it builds excitement, even if she’s always in sex shop outfits….

and….

2- E! is a tabloid looking for people to notice them and their Publicist run nonsense….that I guess is looking into getting into porn…albeit softcore porn…something we should all be trying to get into…

Posted in:Courtney Stodden

2013

30

May

Lindsey Vonn Skier Bikini Ass of the Day

I have been around ski hills for years…I do live in Canada, snow is all we have…

From my experience, pro skiers…in all their strong legs from squat glory…rarely have sex appeal….even the amateur ski racers are built like pick-up trucks, you know that could probably bounce on your dick for hours, and rip your dick off with pussy muscles, but that you’d probably need to trick yourself into getting hard for by doing some visualization exercises or some shit….

Well it turns out that Lindsey Vonn in her bikini is not all bad at all…thick can be a good thing….and not just for kicking me in the balls for sexual purposes.

To See the Rest of the Pics
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Lindsey Vonn

2013

30

May

Gisele Bundchen for Vogue Brasil of the Day

I’ve posted some of the pics from this shoot with Gisele…here are the rest…and she’s looking’ greasier than Tom Brady’s ass after a good old fashioned quarterback gang bang after he won the Superbowl….only probably less gay to stare at for the last 10-16 minutes…but I wouldn’t know because the Tom Brady anus video hasn’t been uploaded to the internet yet…

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen

2013

30

May

Alessandra Ambrosio for Vogue Brasil of the Day


In case you were wondering, Alessandra Ambrosio, unlike the girl I saw at the Airport in a Wheelchair….has LEGS….

Legs that I would love to wear as a scarf, you know so that mom pussy acts as a gas mask for me to try to breathe into…even if it is so far dead and a lost cause…I am willing to try…I have hope…because unlike other mom pussy this one’s ass has bounced back from the pregnancy…and that is good enough.

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2013

30

May

Behati Prinsloo for JCrew Swimwear of the Day

OMG!! Call the fucking police – Behati Prinsloo is cheating on Victoria’s Secret with J Crew…in some kind of underground model trading underworld I will never understand because the only models I know are airplanes…that I build….while trying to pass the lonely days as I wait for death…unless you count crackhead meth addicts who fuck you for 10 dollars as models, which luckily I do….

Either way, these are as exciting as nonsense bikini pictures go….which is real fucking exciting if you’re easily excited and don’t need throat fucking porn to be entertained…

Posted in:Behati Prinsloo

2013

30

May

Jessica Hart Modeling with her Tits of the Day

I prefer when Jessica Hart IS TANNING TOPLESS , because nipples are more exciting than staged commercial jobs she’s getting paid to do, even if she doesn’t need money, she’s dating billionaire Stavros, who she will likely get knocked up by, because guess what, he’s a billionaire and she was already willing to get herpes from him, it’s only natural to really commit to the cause and K-Fed him, like all models should. I mean why bother dating some broke ass motherfucker…when you look busty like this, when you can have a life of luxury…I feel like she only took this job with Montreal based store, because it makes it look like she’s trying and I guess that’s all part of her trickery to get the cum shot inside her instead of on her gap tooth face for a change…..

I’m into it.

Posted in:Jessica Hart

2013

30

May

Ewelina Olczak Curvy Bikini Model of the Day

Ewelina Olczak is curvy as fuck and should be in a bikini all the fucking time, it only makes sense, it is her calling, there is little else out there for her to be doing….

She’s Polish, she’s 22, and she’s got good hip to waist ratio….. She’s everything Kate Upton isn’t.

The only tragic thing in all this is that she’s gone the route of bikini model rather than male order bride, cam girl, or human trafficked escort….

Where is the IRON Curtain and it’s communist repression when we fucking need it….

Posted in:Ewelina Olczak

2013

30

May

It’s Prom Season in Bulgaria of the Day

It’s PROM Season….even in Bulgaria, a country you probably assumed didn’t have schools, but was more into teaching kids the life of the streets in preparation of marrying some big, cold, tough chick named OLGA….which I guess after watching this prom video, is exactly what they are doing….keeping it hip hop and thug life while a bitch in red who will grow to be 200 pounds of solid muscle gets involved all kinds….

This is a bit more exciting than hanging in the lobby of every hotel room during prom season hoping to save a sick girl who partied too much with my penis….I figure a high school education is the right level of naivety needed to penetrate especially when drunk for the first time in her tacky cheap gown wearing life…

Posted in:Videos

2013

30

May

Samantha Gradoville Hot for Vogue Latin America of the Day


American Model Samantha Gradoville, who you may remember from such legendary posts as last week’s TITTIES FOR HARPER’S BAZAAR is making serious moves…this time with less amazing, hormone in the American food production system, disproportionately large and amazing tits, but with bikinis instead….and I am endorsing her rise to the top, even if she’s a no name now, she’s built better than pigs like Kate Upton, who only benefitted from the hormones in the food until her gut caught up with the rest of her…so anything is possible, miracles have happened to far less talented girls…

I figure I’d be watching her rise to the top, you know keeping track of it, if I wasn’t so bored of all this talking about girls I don’t know, and was instead being charged for getting caught hiding under their bed masturbating to their dirty laundry while they were out on a shoot, or fucking a rockstar, or doing whatever it is that models do, which I assume is very little.

Posted in:Samantha Gradoville

2013

30

May

Emily Senko’s Tits for L’Officiel Turkey of the Day

This is not the first time I am posting tit pics of EMILY SENKO , but I feel like it is, because all these girls, no matter how lovely they are, pretty much all melt into one another and are virtually the exact fucking same.

This one is American, that one is South African, just show your tits you tall freak, and make a fortune doing it.

Not to mention keeping track of people I do fuck or want to fuck in real life is hard enough, my brain just can’t handle keeping track of bitches who get paid to show their tits, there are just too many of them, and ultimately, I care about them as much as they care about me, only I’ve seen their tits and now so have you.

Posted in:Emily Senko|NSFW