I have no idea who Ashley SKy is, but I do know that she has fake tits, and that Terry Richardson is taking pics of her, so either he’s using her to tap into his creative porno caliber pics, or she’s actually something mainstream and this is for a magazine…but really who fucking cares why he got this tall, awesome body naked, what matters is that she is naked…but not naked enough. I need more fucking nipple to make my day complete, but I’ll take it anyway…I’m always into being introduced to new girls I can try to masturbate to when bored.
Who the fuck is Brenda Song?! It turns out she’s an asian…an Asian who despite being South East asian, didn’t prostitute herself on the street of Vietnam at the age of 9, but instead to the execs at Disney…but culturally, she’s programmed to work the streets for 5 dollar, and that is why she’s walking around in what might well just be a bra, cuz that shirt on top of the bra, isn’t doin’ a whole fucking lot. I am pretty sure I’ve never heard of her, but it’s a slow day so I’m gonna post this nonsense.
Champion Boxer Adrien Broner was arrested on Monday after eating out a stripper…I didn’t bother looking into the story any more than watching the awesome videos, because really, this video is all I need to know…and that is that when drunk, rich, and a fucking killer….an ass in your face, is hard to turn down…I mean even when sober, poor, and too out of shape to walk up three stairs an ass in your face is hard to turn down….so watch the video….because other than the whole making it rain…you’d be the guy getting kicked out of the place for trying to stick a finger / your penis in.
So the Spring Breakers aren’t in the media enough the last 6 months. From hired paparazzi on set, to magazines and controversy over Disney sluts gone wild, having threesomes and getting naked like it was their cell phone when they were 17 and dating a gay dude.
All the pieces of the puzzle are in place, so why not throw in a new story before it hits, about how rapper Gucci Mane, who has a sex scene in the movie, that may even be actual sex, fell asleep while getting ridden by some girl who could balance coke cans on her booty….
And why not have me buy into the shit, as an excuse to post the amazing clip from the OG spring breakers movie Harmony Korine drew inspiration from in making this movie, what will be his biggest commercial success…despite his whole pretending he’s an artist bullshit angle…
Here’s the story from I don’t even know where
“They sent me a clip of this girl walking across the room with three or four Coke cans on her ass, and we cast her, based on that video,”
“In his entourage, everybody smokes weed from the beginning of the day to the end,” explained Korine. “So we’re inside this house in St. Petersburg, and the fucking weed smoke was so insane and Gucci was basically catatonic. I was like, ‘Gucci, you’ve got to have sex with this chick now!’” How did he receive the news? “He wanted her to ride him so he wouldn’t have to do any physical labor.”
For a while, that worked. “So we’re shooting the sequence, and as he is getting fucked, I start to hear snores,” said Korine. “He had literally passed out! And she was riding his dick the whole time. I’d never in my life filmed a sex scene where the dude was sleeping … and she was on top of him for a good 45 minutes.”
Good story bro…..I fall asleep 90 percent of the time when I have sex….it doesn’t make the news…
She’s got a lot of fucking curves and I don’t just mean big ol’ titties like Oprah, I mean thickness, like a belly you’d think she’s try to take some laxatives or get an enema like a pornstar at an anal scene…or maybe even not eat considering she’s a fucking model and modeling, even your big tits, should come with a serious level of fitness…but I’m not hating, I’d take this fat blonde over that fat Kate Upton blonde, even if I’d rather put them both in a cage and make them fight to the death over a burger.
Can’t girls have big tits without being fucking pics about it. Seriously.
There is a movie called Bath Salt Zombies, that apparently is barely a fucking movie, but does have an IMDB Page , even if based on these shots, the budget looks like it may have been 30-75 bucks.
Since there are tits in it, when really there has to be tits in any movie that looks this shit, even if the tits are on some busted up and broken down no name called Erin R. Ryan, who will probably remain a no name, cuz she’s gross and her tits are gross, but who will always have this genius legacy to share with her kids and grand kids about the time mommy starred in what could be a funny movie concept, but that was just a fail
At least they kill her off…I mean she’s a little gremlin don’t feed her after midnight.
I guess these pics of tennis star modeling her underwear line, would have been better if the underwear line was more of a lingerie line, and the tennis star was more Anna Kournikova or Maria Sharapova, because Caroline Wozniacki, may be a powerhouse of a player, and watching her grunt with her powerful swing may be sexy when playing against a more manlier girl, but she’s not one of the babes of tennis, and I think her underwear design really properly represent her sex appeal.
Before my love for Lohan, or at least my fake stalker, hoping to get arrested as a publicity stunt, that no one paid attention to was replaced with Miley Cyrus, Amanda Seyfried, and pretty much any actress who still gets work and that I am not tired of hearing about, I was a huge fan of Lohan’s perfect tits, that after a lot of debate, have been decided are just awesome fakes. Turns out, I still am and that she’s still got a warm, spot in my bed next to my fat diabetic sweaty, apnea gurggling wife and pug.
When I see her walking bra-less and in a tank top, when she’s supposed to be in lock down, I can’t help but feeling all those things I once felt for her, which isn’t really much considering I have no emotions, and was more a “hey that girl on TV has great tits”…but it’s better than forgetting she fucking exists, even if she wants me to, since she stopped texting me 3 years ago, and I feel that was both of our peak….even if she’s still fucking perfect.
I love these kinds of stories….Ashlynn Brooke a pornstar who is no more…has left the adult world, because I guess it was just a bad decision she made as a kid, when she wanted fame and money and realized that porn comes with very little of both. But more importantly it comes with a lot of shame, lack of self respect, humiliation to your friends and family and an inability to live with yourself, or live with a normal life, because you’re just a vessel for random cock from dudes you probably wouldn’t even talk to at the gym cuz they are slime as fuck.
Well now she’s a car sales person and she posted this youtube video for your help.
When she realizes it’s easier to take dick the ass for 1,000 dollas than sell a buick, she’ll be back.
She’s just going through a soul cleansing phase, before realizing she’s already out there….goin’ straight to the mainstream life is a fail.
But watching her is pretty funny as she tries so hard to be normal….
Sure I prefer Candice Swanepoel half naked in standardized Victoria’s Secret pics….or topless for fashion pics….or showing her tight little booty in magazines….because she’s got a body that’s incredible, at least in pictures….making me appreciate all things that she does…including posting pics of her boxing….and not just because I like hot girls who can beat the fuck out of me while I get to punch them in the face in the process….knowing she’s 4 inches taller than me and probably is 140 lbs of solid muscle, you know spread out over her 6 foot 2 frame….no wait that is the only reason I like this pic.
