DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2010

22

Jun

Jessica Hart Bikini Pictures of the Day

I like bitches in bikinis. I prefer when they are fit and look good in bikinis but I take what I can get.

So if it’s a matter of watching girls in a bikini who are fat, skinny, HIV Positive of virgins I’m down….and if they are in their bikinis in their backyards, on their balconies, in the parks, at the public pool, at the local beach, at the terminally ill ward at the hospital and not actually in bikinis, but in hospital gowns that look like bikinis with a pair of scissors I get away with cuz of the morphine, I’m down…

Now I may not know who Jessica Hart is, but I hear she’s a mode from Australia, the land of bitches in bikinis, and really it doesn’t matter what she does, cuz she’s in a bikini and like I said that’s all it takes for me to be down…

To See The Rest of the PIctures – Follow The Link
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Posted in:Jessica Hart

2010

22

Jun

stepNEWS of the Day

2 Comments »

The world is a fun place and here is the proof….I have a feeling none of you watch these videos cuz I get no comments on these posts, but I am keeping shit around for now cuz I like it and that’s all that matters.

Doctor caught spying on patients & employees

Audrina Patridge Stalker Pleads No Contest

Man Evades Truck Crashing into Building

Caught on Tape: Burglar Pulls Food from Underwear

FL Woman Beat Up Boyfriend Over Last Beer

Posted in:stepNEWS

2010

22

Jun

Amanda Seyfried is Still Boring as Fuck of the Day

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Fuck bitch…step it up. I’ve been tracking her in hopes she’d slip up from being this consistently boring cunt, but she’s been very loyal to her cause and keeps up the boring hustle, despite having seen her naked in a movie, and despite her potential to take over the paparazzi cuz the world is eager for new pussy to be flashed, but instead she just goes shopping with her homosexual friend, fully clothed, fully covered up, with no make-up on, like some kind of tree hugger lookin’ to raise money to help the oil clean up efforts and the whole thing upsets me. Wasted youth, wasted celebrity pussy wasting my fucking time. Cunt.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried

2010

22

Jun

Jessica Alba is Still Hot of the Day

3 Comments »

Just a heads up….I can’t testify that her pussy is still up to speed or even still a pussy after the baby, but the rest of her looks alright to me and that’s all that matters to me since I’m not trying to stick my dick in her gaping hole and not touching the vagina walls, I’m just looking at pictures of it clothed and that’s all I have to say about that….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2010

22

Jun

Salma Hayek’s Mom Nipples of the Day

6 Comments »

Salma Hayek is a good fertile Mexican designed to breed….She’s got fat milk filled tits, a fat ass, wide hips ready to drop a new baby every 9 months, and her nipples are like faucets ready to feed a small town and despite having lost her appeal since she’s old and washed up, she’s still got her moments and I guess here’s a glimpse of what was…..and who really cares…cuz as a Mexican she’s automatically a second rate citizen and seeing her ego and celebrity blind her of that, annoys me. She’s the kind of Mexican who forgets she is Mexican the kind of bitch who is trying to be white so hard that she has Mexican staff maintaining her house that she treats like second rate citizens…but I guess her mom tits have the ability to make me ignore that….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Salma Hayek

2010

22

Jun

Hayden Panettiere’s Midget Legs of the Day

7 Comments »

I didn’t realize that midget was offensive until yesterday when I got to talking to some girl and midgets came up in conversation. I started joking around about how disgusting midgets are and how the give would give me nightmares if I had to deal with them more than just crossing the street to avoid them. But then she ruined my fun by showing me a family photo and both her parents were fucking midgets….it was like a sitcom situation you see on TV and get mad at how shitty the writing is to make such an obvious awkward joke…only it was unfortunately real life and the good thing is that I have no soul, I didn’t care, and made more jokes about the shit until she lost her shit and told me to fuck off cuz I was a disgusting pig…and although Hayden Panettiere isn’t an actual midget…she might as well be…since her sex appeal is about on the same level as a midget…but some how she was marketed into being a hot thing a few years ago…something I never understood…but for those of you who still think she’s hot cuz marketing works on you…here are her legs…cuz it turns out girls in shorts aren’t quite as good to jerk off to as girls who are naked and inserting objects inside themselves…..but they are better than nothing….I guess…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere

2010

22

Jun

Katie Holmes in her Tight Mom Jeans of the Day

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The reason I watched That 70s Show when it first drop was to watch Jackie and her 15 year old ass in the tight high-waisted jeans. There was something magical about a teenage cameltoe and I used to write thank you letters to Fox and Rupert Murdoch for finding clever ways to promote kiddie porn and child erotica without getting in trouble…like the guy who wrote his name to look like a cock on Jeopardy without getting censored….

That said, I was too busy to waste my time on Katie Holmes and her dyke nerd tree hugging coffee drinking wordy bullshit on Dawson’s creek….where I thought she was average at best….amongst a gang of fuckers I’d probably beat up if I was in High School with their 30 year old still in High School asses.

But for some reason, I’m digging her now. Maybe it’s cuz I know she hasn’t had cock in years, thanks to her “marriage” with Tom Cruise, maybe it’s the fact that she’s in a cult which proves she’s easy to manipulate, or maybe it’s just the tight jeans….and really who cares……

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Katie Holmes

2010

22

Jun

Megan Fox’s Skinny Little Ass of the Day

5 Comments »

I like my bitches skinny. I love eating disorders. I love when a bitch’s thighs don’t touch, but I also like ass to have a little more soul than this…That’s not to say I like my shit big, black and scary as fuck in line at the KFC for some fried chicken, but it is to say that this non-existant shit isn’t ideal cuz there’s nothing awesome about seeing an anus when a bitch is standing up….Ass cheeks are our friends….and even the pubescent bitches I see at the pool have more booty than this….

I figure all this Megan Fox bitch needs to do is spend a little less money on plastic surgery on her face and a little more money getting ass implants…not that it matters cuz it just goes to waste on David from 90210….especially now that her career is over…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Megan Fox

2010

22

Jun

Coco’s Fat Ass in White of the Day

2 Comments »

Coco is a fucking vision in white. When I see her in pictures I can almost smell the old semen dripping down her thigh after one of her johns gave her and extra 1000 dollars to let him cum inside her before Ice-T offered her marriage to work exclusively for him….the only thing I don’t understand is the level of confidence it must take for her to rock this outfit, I sure as hell hope she’s wearing a plastic grocery bag for protection, cuz when you’re this used up, you never know what the fuck’s gonna leak out of your ass and pussy….

Here she is in a walking the dog that should be walking her cuz she’s a dog situation, but people (black dudes) find her hot, so I guess I should to, since fitting in with the black folk has always been a priority to me….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Coco

2010

22

Jun

Emmy Rossum in Her Leg Warmers of the Day

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Who the fuck is Emmy Rossum and why is she wearing this shit, but more importantly why is she named after the most coveted award in TV. Were her parents trying to trick her into working in Hollywood at a young age or is it just her nickname..it turns out she doesn’t have parents, she’s from a single mother household, which means one beautiful and amazing thing I can never get enough of….Daddy issues….

I don’t know why she is dressed like some weird Asian circus performer…. all she needs is some balls to juggle….in her mouth…. but it’s not a fetish to me, if anything I hate the shorts over pantyhose bullshit without the stupid leg warmers…so just adding another layer of stupidity to an already stupid outfit is just fucking annoying….

I figure if she had a father, things woulda worked out different for her….you know she’d be a little more stable and wouldn’t try so hard to get old men to notice her…

Either way, I dig Jewish pussy when it looks good even in stupid outfits and not like some mutant inbred shit, so here is Emmy Rossum…in a stupid outfit….even though I prefer my daddy issues on stripper poles, showing off their dad-less fuck holes…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Emmy Rossum