2006
25
Dec
I Am – Lohan Stalker Of The Day – video powered by Metacafe
It’s Christmas, I am not Working Today, But I made this for you and it’s a fucking Christmas Miracle. Enjoy and have a lovely day with your loved ones or alone or doing whatever it is that you do. Cuddles.
Posted in:stepSTALKER|Unsorted
2006
22
Dec
It’s Christmas weekend and I need to get my Holiday shopping done. I am planning on hitting up the Salvation Army with my 10 dollar budget for the family and it’s going to be a Christmas Miracle. The next 2 days I would be drinking egg nog, but can’t afford it, I’d be eating holiday treats but I can’t afford it. I’d be bringing holiday cheer to my neighbors because money isn’t everything but I am too lazy. Either way, it’s going to be a poor person’s Christmas, but I’ve seen It’s a Wonderful Life and according to Jimmy Stewart, there’s no such thing as a poor person’s Christmas. Be safe, have fun, and if you’re alone, go to the strip club. They’ll take care of you.
Some Hot Site
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Courtney Love’s Vagina..
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Some Video Called Room Service – Sent in By a Reader
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart…
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Bald Knob Marina
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Find Yourself a Christmas Bride
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Here are a Bunch of Santa’s Little Helpers…
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some L-Word Lesbian Action
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Sook Yin Lee From Much Music Getting Slammed in Shortbus Gifs…AMAZING
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Fetish Magazine for you to Love….
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Isabel Lucas on the Beach
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Pam Anderson Leg Kick Video
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Worlds Greatest Dad
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Fergie in FHM
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Do you like Girls Who Masturbate With Sex Toys?
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South Park Christmas
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Weird Al Interviews K-Fed
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Step T-Shirt’s Designed by This Guy – Get Ready
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Miss Nevada is an Escort
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Miss Nevada Pics That Got Her Fired
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The Girls From Wonder Years
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Do you Need Bed Linens? I do because my wife is a disaster…
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Boobs,,,
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Carmen Electra Paparazzi Video
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Vote for this Gingerbread House
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Here’s a Naked Femjoy Chick
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Christmas Recipes for Disaster
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Check Out Krystal from Big Brother Australia…She’s GOod
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Emily Scott Does FHM
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Star Jones Gets Pranked
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Some Gisele Bikini Pics
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Here’s a Holiday Mash-Up For You..
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Coco’s Ass Implants in Smooth Magazine…
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Get your friends laid on New Years Eve, No Better Time That To Get This While it’s 3 for 1, We All Know You Need It…
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
22
Dec
Today’s Christmas Miracle has probably been floating around the internet for quite some time now, but I am only getting to it now, because that’s pretty much how things work here. I lure you in with old pictures and seduce you with my life-changing stories…Either way, this is Lucy Pinder and her boobs, I mean friends. She’s some UK Slag and she’s dressed for the Holiday. Since this is my last post before Christmas, I figured I’d milk the shit out of slutty girls in Christmas gear…
Speaking of milking shit, I went window shopping in the Jewish part of town yesterday because one of my homeless friends told me it’s amazing to see these women shop for their cruises, resorts or whatever southern vacation they are going on. After 8 hours of window shopping next to the changing rooms in a bathing suit store I was asked to leave by security, but before they escorted me out, they confiscated my stepCAMERA and no matter what I said, I wasn’t getting it back, they kept telling me that videotaping girls trying on Bikinis is illegal and that I would get charged for something illegal. I wasn’t willing to be in jail on Christmas, Again.
My initial reaction was to blame the Jews you know a first they killed Jesus, now they’ve killed my digicam kinda thing but I realized that I was in their hood and that was just the easy way out.
Speaking of easy, here’s them there Lucy Pinder and her friends pics…
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
22
Dec
I call Paris and leave random messages. The original concept was to pretend I was calling lovers or girlfriends or whatever so that Paris felt awkward when she answered, but I decided to leave a homo message to her fiance Stavros the Greek heir…I pretended to be his lover and it’s funny. If you are wondering what the washed out words were – it’s “Impreganting you with my seed” and “We are Greek and our people were raised on anal sex”….Either way, I am a fuckin star. Fuck You. Christmas in 2 days…Bring your dancing shoes. Homo.Cuddles.
Posted in:stepSTALKER|Unsorted
2006
21
Dec
Here are some pictures that were sent in yesterday by one of my readers. I assume he is the one who took the pics because they are shitty cellphone quality, but then I remembered that my readers are useless virgins who don’t really leave the house, unless it’s to go buy new computer parts or videogames….with the occasional stop off at McDonald’s for a Milkshake. Rumor has it that they bring all the boys to the yard…
Speaking of boys in the yard, I went down to my mailbox yesterday afternoon to see if anyone sent me any Christmas cards that would bring me Christmas Cheer in this time of Christmas Miracles, and there were none, but there was a Christmas Miracle that came in the form of a check for 27 dollars addressed to me. I am not sure where it came from, I can only assume it was from one of the porn companies I linked but I did know that it was going to fund my Stepfather Christmas party, even though I don’t have a company, just a shitty website that only I work for….The reason I decided to have a Christmas party was to celebrate the victory of this site while getting wasted, but my 27 dollar budget wasn’t going to take me as far as other Christmas parties do, like sipping vintage whiskey with my boss while he’s getting a blowjob from the hot new sales rep. So I bought 2 cheap bottles of wine for drinks, a box of donuts for food and a cheap cigar for entertainment. I sat on a park bench in the cold alone, passed out half way through the second bottle and woke up to find 2 homeless guys drinking my wine and eating my donuts…I tried to get them to sing Christmas Carols with me, but they were too insane to understand what I was saying, so I went home to my wife who stank like shit. It may not have been as glamorous as it could have been but it was a fucking Christmas Miracle nevertheless and I can only hope it gets better from here…
Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
21
Dec
These are some pics of Alley Bagget, a Playboy model posing for Christmas in some Fuzzy Lingerie….to bring the Holiday Spirit to you and yours…
My Necro Post got linked up on a couple sites and got back to Necro, because he’s one of those accessible rappers, who probably doesn’t actually make money off his shitty music…It turns out that he’s not into being criticized this is what he wrote:
I AINT A FAT DUDE AND MY MUSIC DOESNT GET OLD FAST
GET OF RID THAT SHIT AND WE CAN TALK ABOUT AN INTERVIEW
REMEMBER I PUNCHED THAT KID IN THE FACE IN THE FRONT ROW
TALK ABOUT THAT
Anyone who reads this site knows that that Necro Post was weak. I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone’s feelings or make anyone emotionally eat more than they already do. He writes lyrics about how hard and how sadistic he is but dude can’t take some fat mexican dude with a shitty website calling him fat. I guess it’s really not hard to pretend you’re a crazed sex and porn deviant or whatever he actually raps about because I haven’t heard any of his music in 5 years. So I wrote this to him:
i am not trying to start beef, i am probably the biggest push you’ve got in a while. 25,000 people saw that shitty video. I wasn’t at your show, and your music gets old after I hear the same song for 7 years, but no beef…although that’s what you’re probably hoping for…fatty.
let’s get that interview
with love
jesus martinez
drunkenstepfather.com
And He Wrote…
WHY R U LISTENING TO THE SAME SONG FOR 7 YEARS??
I DROPPED 3 NEW ALBUMS ON MY LABEL IN 2005
5 NEW ALBUMS IN 2004
WHAT THE FUCK R U TALKING ABOUT?
Tough guy who writes in CAPS and sings about rape, murder, anal in fishnets, pussylips and being addicted to his dick is really. I figured having the ability to write line after line of smut that make no sense but rhymes would give him a sense of humor. When Herschel realizes that sucking on fat chicks in Montreal doesn’t make you “hard” or “vulgar” or “sadistic”, luring insecure girls on stage, who like to fuck anyone, isn’t a talent, DJs at the local bar have been doing the same thing for years, even the dude at my videostore gets pussy cuz he doesn’t charge bitches a late fee…
Since the new me is positive and optimistic, I would like to give Necro the love he deserves for being in the game for such a long time and still performing, I’d like to also that he has a great way with words, and rhymes a lot better than I ever could.
Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
20
Dec
I am watching my daily stories because that’s what lazy Mexicans do when they don’t have jobs or cable, I am not sure which one this is because I don’t actually watch this shit, but Rose from Golden Girls is on the show. I always wondered what happened to Rose, she was the only hot Golden Girl, only because she was stupid and stupid girls are easy….either way, now I know where she is and I am not a better person for it. I was talking to my Lawyer a couple of days ago and he was trying to convince me to date elderly women. I think his wife is in her 60s and she always has cookies made when I go over there for drinks. It’s really my only escape from the hell that is my family life and it’s free booze. He suggested I join a Bingo club, or a Bridge club or a volunteer at an old folks home, because lonely widows with Alzheimers are easy and generally have low expectations. I figured since I am married, if I am going to cheat on my wife, it’s not going to be with somebody’s grandma no matter how good her cookies are….
Speaking of old lady cookies, here are some pics of….Shelley Long in her underwear from some old fucking movie. It’s not the latest or the greatest but positive me says that these pics are awesome….
Get the Video Here
Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
20
Dec
This is one of the Good Charlotte twin’s girlfriend, not the Good Charlotte who slammed the Duffgusting sister and Nicole Richie, the other one. The fact that I even know this much about these people is embarrassing enough, so I am not going to start dropping names to retain the little level of dignity I still have….Either way, Santa must be rubbing her the right way cuz her nipples are hard…
I have been getting told that I am too negative lately. I don’t find much funny and I constantly dis celebrities and hipsters. So when people I know bring up shit like American Apparel, Vice Magazine, Last Nights Party or start sending me stupid clips from stupid people doing stupid happy dances, I tell the to shut the fuck up because I find it all lame. I don’t think that makes me lame but I decided that for my sanity, I am going to start looking at the brighter side of things, because I do believe negativity is poison, maybe not as poisonous as American Apparel, Vice Magazine, Last Nights Party or videos of people doing happy dances, but poison never the less.
From now on – I am happy and optimistic and I won’t dwell on how life has wronged me, but embrace all the good things that have happened….like the time I got a blowjob in a movie theater I snuck into a few years ago by some random college girl….so get ready for a happy site. It’s a Christmas Miracle.
Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
20
Dec
I feel bad for the general public. I was just watching the news and they showed a youtube video of someone’s reaction of Life Magazine’s You are the Person of the Year Cover…Either way she was doing a happy dance, and the reason I feel bad for the general public is because they find the happy dance funny. There’s nothing funny about the happy dance or anything funny about these links….
Jelena Veljaca Sextape – She’s a Croatian Soap Star – But Not the Kind of Soap Croatians Need Cuz They Stink….
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Petra Nemcova In Lingerie
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Weird Cast Fetish Directory
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Wifey Does a Job Interview….That Ends With….Her Showing Off Her Big Ol’ Boobs
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Big Brother Brazils Ass
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Jaime Hammer Action…
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Famke Janssen For Peta
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Camilla Belle Is a Pianist
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All Kinds of Britney News for You…
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Knit Porn…
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Some Stupid Christmas Video That You Will Hate
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Christmas Party Picture of the Day
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Miss USA – Tara Conner has Implants and Gets Drunk at Frat Parties and Does Gangbangs and Blow….Sounds As American As Can Be….
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I posted these Victoria Silvstedt Pics Yesterday, But In The Event You Didn’t Click the Link.. She’s Topless
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Aaron Carter Falls In Love Again…
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The Duffgusting Sisters Go Skiing
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Paulina Rubio Sexiest Superhero and She’s Mexican
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Dad is that you?
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Penelope Cruz Leaving the Gym
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Perez and X17 Have a Fight For Publicity and They Are Both Cunts
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Here is a Girl and Her Webcam – NSFW
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SimoneSez Santa
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Real World Denver Episode 6
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Watching People Party Bores Me…
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A little NSFW – Lookin’ Good Sweetheart….
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Last Nights Party Does Titty
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A little More NSFW – Lookin’ Good Sweetheart…
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Some kind of Fall Out Boy VIdeo Bullshit…
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Buy SnorgTees Now
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Some kind of Mos Def New Single Bullshit…
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Hayden Panettiere Has a Kung Fu Boyfriend
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Willie’s Cousin Ray
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Buy Pherlure for your Loved Ones for X-Mas…
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
2006
19
Dec
Here are some pics of Lohan at Teddy’s on Saturday, eating pretzels cuz she’s fatter than ever and fat ppl love pretzels, it’s a fact.
I don’t really give a fuck about all this celebrity shit, it’s actually depressing to me. I wrote about how I went from site to site yesterday for the first time in months and everyone is writing the same fucking thing. It’s dull as fucking shit and I don’t realize how they get traffic, but they get fucking traffic, a lot more than I do. So I start reading some of their blurbs and I realize that these fuckers have no fucking talent. They just know how to design and promote a website with people who are equally lame as they are. So instead of getting myself down over it, I realized that the perfect analogy for the internet and me is that I am like the cool kid with a cigarette in hand and a leather jacket in a 1950’s varsity party. Point of all this is to say that the leather jacket always wins.
Speaking of winning, Insider 16 Year Old Hipster Gives Her Version of the Night at Teddy’s with Lohan, Like How Illegal Shit Went Down At Paris Hilton’s Sex Tape Co-Star’s House Between Lohan and Others. I was thinking the Illegal shit she was referencing was getting fucked since she’s underage but I am sure it’s more drug related than that ….Find Out More at Her 16 Year Old Homeless Lookin’ Girl Blog GO
Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted
