I don’t know either of these people, and I am not really into the whole sheer top for anyone who isn’t a 17 year old girl with no bra on caught in a rainstorm. But the fact is these guys are working together towards something new. Their combined efforts is nothing to laugh at, just maybe feel a little awkward about, especially if the couple on the left is your mom and dad, how fucking embarassing is that for you? The guy looks like a tow truck driver or someone too butch to rock a sheer top. He looks like he would beat up the fag in the sheer shorts, if they were to cross paths in a dark alley, or bath house. I am assuming they aren’t his daughters, because daughters generally don’t stick by daddy’s side, when daddy’s exposing his penis….based on personal experience, pulling out my dick around the step kids is always a mistake.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

Today, I was asked if I ever get mistaken for someone with Torrets Syndrome, because I asked a bitch if she let dude’s cum inside her. She went on to tell me that a dude in her highschool class with Downs Syndrome, used to talk the same way I talk, which makes one ask the question, why are you in class with a Retard? Is it because you have Downs Syndrome too, or is it just a learning disorder? Retard, the point is that people do think i need psychiatric help and that I am weird because I write the shit I do on the internet…but the shit I write is just jokes. The funny thing is that the very same people who are telling me this are the ones that behind closed doors are begging their girl’s to fist them, or their boys to fuck up the ass, or spank them, or dominate them, or fucking shit on them, or they are cheating on their significant others, or they are getting back alley abortions, or they aren’t using condoms, point of the fucking stroy is that you motherfucker’s are just as fucking weird as me, I just write about it, and laugh about it all while you pieces of shit are living it…because I denounced sex when my penis broke and I married a fat bitch 5 years ago…..

Point of this post is that I am not the issue in society, society is the issue. I spent about 1 hour of my life watching the Juno Awards last night. It’s a Canadian piece of shit that honors cunts like Michael Buble. Pam Anderson was the useless plastic tittied host, and there were no bitches I wanted to fuck . Canadian music isn’t all bad, but it is when it’s all together in one room. In lobster country. Now this is what people should be concerned with, because I find it much more offensive and embarassing than the shit I write daily.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I wrote to Christie Hefner, Hugh’s daughter and president of the company saying that they need me to write an article for their magazine. This is the response I got:

Hi Jesus.

Christie passed your note along to Chris Napolitano, who runs the magazine,
and myself. You’re site is quite provocative, but it’s not really right for
us. Feel free to keep me in the loop on your future projects.

Thanks a lot. — jdt

John D. Thomas
Editor of Playboy.com

Not only do my readers hate me, but now Playboy does too. They won’t give me a DrunkenStepfather article because I am not right for them. So today is the day I realize that I will never amount to shit because mainstream media just doesn’t accept me….I guess the only good in all this is that I didn’t really want an article, I was just testing to see if Christie’s email actually worked.

Feel free to email John D. Thomas, Editor of Playboy if you feel like he made the wrong decision and that DrunkenStepfather.com should have an Article in their magazine. At least 50 of you useless fucks like me, so email them demanding he change his mind.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

The girls grew up on this show despite the hours I spent fighting with them over it. I learned to just sit back and take it. I figured it was my responsibility to buy a second TV, but that meant sacrificing booze for a month, something I wouldn’t do. So I did what every self respecting man does, I sat back and got wasted while watching Caroline Rhea’s fatty tits bounce around. I know when I was in my early 20s this wouldn’t have been my dream friday night, but life sucks, I just learnt to accept it, with Sabrina the Teenage witch and a bottle of Jack….Anyway, I always thought Sabrina was busted with her chubby awkward body and face that look like the disgusting 14 pound shit I just took…I am not healthy. I don’t know if it was actually 14 pounds, but it was some next level shit. Point of the story is that Sabrina the Teenage Witch is fat.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

So I get one TV channel, and that TV channel happens to have the Canadian rights to American Idol. I also have one shitty TV and two step-daughters, who watch American Idol. I am usually drunk on the couch by 8 pm, so I watch it. The reason I am drunk at 8 pm is cuz I start drinking around now. The point of the post is to say Kellie Pickler is jokes. She can barely sing, she looks good enough, she’s white trash and poor, has a daddy in jail and a momma dead, a sick grandaddy and bitch doesn’t know what calamars is….I am a fucking drunken, useless mexican piece of shit…and I know what calamars is….anyway these are her highschool prom pics, dressed like some kind of slut, I guess she’s lucky Idol hit, cuz the rest of the girls in her town are already knocked up and ready to drop….poor bitches don’t like to wait too long after their 16th birthday before having babies. That’s my story that’s not really a story. I am useless right now.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

So I get one TV channel, and that TV channel happens to have the Canadian rights to American Idol. I also have one shitty TV and two step-daughters, who watch American Idol. I am usually drunk on the couch by 8 pm, so I watch it. The reason I am drunk at 8 pm is cuz I start drinking around now. The point of the post is to say Kellie Pickler is jokes. She can barely sing, she looks good enough, she’s white trash and poor, has a daddy in jail and a momma dead, a sick grandaddy and bitch doesn’t know what calamars is….I am a fucking drunken, useless mexican piece of shit…and I know what calamars is….anyway these are her highschool prom pics, dressed like some kind of slut, I guess she’s lucky Idol hit, cuz the rest of the girls in her town are already knocked up and ready to drop….poor bitches don’t like to wait too long after their 16th birthday before having babies. That’s my story that’s not really a story. I am useless right now.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I am not a porn site. I have defended myself over over again, and for some reason it’s always the same people who hate on me. These people are usually Jewish and Virgins and scared of the word FUCK or CUNT. I do however visit porn sites because I like watching girls get fucked, and by fucked I mean with penis, with toes, with mouth or by their fucking self. When I look for porn I use Booble.com, it’s a search engine that was bought by AOL, for more info click the link.

New York, April 1, 2006 – Time Warner (NYSE TW) announced today it was spinning off its AOL Online subsidiary in an all stock transaction with privately held Booble.com. Booble founder and CEO, Bob Smart will take the reins of the combined company, which will henceforth be known as AOOL.

I don’t care about business movers and shakers, but when mainstream goes to porn, it gives us more hope here at Stepfather, and by we I mean me. Cuddles.

Visit Booble Here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

A few years ago, I used to work in a Drug Store. I was the stock clerk. Meaning I was pretty much the underpaid bitch who helped old ladies bring their bags to their cars for a quarter, I also got to stock the shelves, and use the price gun, but only when they trusted me enough to…it was like some stock clerk hierarchy….and my boss took his useless job too fucking seriously. I understand, people need to feel important/proud of what they do, otherwise there is no point living. Truth is when you are a career stockclerk, there really is no point in living.

Point of my story is there was once a Turkish Muslim cab driver who came into the store and we started chatting about sex. He told me that when he was 16 he couldn’t fuck girls or jerk off cuz of his religion. So he would get together with his boys and fuck the shit out of one of their dogs. He was laughing because one of his friends got stuck in the dog when it was his turn. Fucking Kelly Osborne would probably the equivalent of this muslim tradition, only in the Kelly Osborne version they’d be fucking a pig, even though that’s against their religion. I don’t think fucking a dog or a pig is right, I am just telling you the fucking story he told me to bring the point home that Kelly is a fucking ditch-pig, and she should stand up proud, that slouching slag.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I want to point out that I don’t judge Paris for having Herpes. I read a long time ago that it was finally out in the open and I decided that when she officially came out with her STD, I would stop rippin’ into her dried up diseased cooch. The reason being that it is funny to laugh at people who put themselves at risk of STDs, like having unprotected sex with dirtbags like the dude in her sex tape. I don’t think it’s funny to laugh at people who actually land the disease, ultimately because the jokes on them…for the rest of their life, they’ll be tending to that shit, and we can all laugh to ourselves.

That said. This bitch is all over the fucking place lately, there are pics of her in LA yesterday, these are pics of her in Miami 4 days ago, and I even saw pics of her filming for Simple Life, god fuckin’ knows where. I have enough trouble leaving my house and walking to the store to buy a coffee sometimes I have to see doctors, therapists, immigration people and it’s a fucking struggle. I guess there’s nothing funny in that. It’s just sad…but sad is the new happy, go fuck yourself.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted