I hate non-nude models for a pretty simple reason, they do not get nude. They lure dudes in who just wait and wait to see them naked. It’s a fuckin’ scam cuz they never get naked, they never show their cunts and they never will…so keep paying them their monthly membership fees so you can keep jerking off to their erect nipples in beaters, while I harass them on Myspace and read posts on forums by losers like you arguing about whether their naked pics are actually real.

Christina Model Personal MySpace:

My name is Christina, I’m 20 yrs. old and just married my highschool sweetheart. He is my EVERYTHING! I graduated last month from cosmetology school and will be working down in Tampa with my sister-in- law. My husband and I spend most of our time together boating and taking vacations. I’m fun to be around and like spending time with my bestfriends Lauren and Cassadee, I love you girls to death!

Here She is With Her Husband…

Here is her cabin that she bought with your money….

Here she is with her friends….

Visit Her MySpace By Clicking This Link (Ask to see her Vagina)

Bonus:

Candid Shots Where You Can See Nip (fuckin’ losers)

Watch Her Tease You in Purple….

Missy Model Personal Myspace

I was born in Miami and have lived in the Hill almost all my life. (Boring HUH!) I have the best boyfriend ever. My future husband! He is so gorgeous. No one can ever compare, so don’t even try. I LOVE YOU BABE ——————- 5-22-04

Here she is with her boyfriend/future husband…

Here she is with her friends…..

Here is her boyfriend/future husband…

Visit Her Myspace by Clicking this Link (ask to see her vagina)

BONUS

MissyModel in a Thong on the Beach Video

Dresses Like Wonder Woman

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I am a migrant worker and there is nothing I hate more than working for people who don’t talk to me. I have been a gardener, valet, bus boy and a stockboy. I have worked in the shipping department, I have operated inflatable games at Jewish events and in every one of those jobs had a cunt who would treat me like the piece of shit my job made me feel like daily….meaning I’d get zero recognition, I’d get no please or thank you, no eye contact and really minimal conversation but if something went wrong they would have no problem yelling at me. I remember the day I realized that rich people don’t have enough respect for people, and that was when working in a drug store when the hottest bitch I’d never have the chance to slam asked me for enemas and Tuck’s medicated pads….obviously if I was someone she had any level of respect for, she woulda kept that shit to herself. Instead she’s asking me, because she knows I am not in her socio-economic class. I guess Alba forgets where her Spic ancestors are from and the shit they had to eat before raising her in an upper middle class home that allowed her to run after her acting dream so here is Alba sitting on her phone like this poor Korean woman isn’t worth her time as she files down her toes.

Now, I would let Alba talk on her phone while flinging her shit at me as I was dress up like a little school girl getting raped by her AIDS infected boyfriend just to let me play with her toes, and I am not a foot fetishist but that is besides the point, I think.

Bonus Alba at the Spic Awards

Bonus Number 2 Alba with her Rich Lame Boyfriend who some stalker is gonna kill thinkin’ he’s got a chance with this bitch, that stalker may be you….

Another Bonus Alba in a Pink Shirt

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I am a migrant worker and there is nothing I hate more than working for people who don’t talk to me. I have been a gardener, valet, bus boy and a stockboy. I have worked in the shipping department, I have operated inflatable games at Jewish events and in every one of those jobs had a cunt who would treat me like the piece of shit my job made me feel like daily….meaning I’d get zero recognition, I’d get no please or thank you, no eye contact and really minimal conversation but if something went wrong they would have no problem yelling at me. I remember the day I realized that rich people don’t have enough respect for people, and that was when working in a drug store when the hottest bitch I’d never have the chance to slam asked me for enemas and Tuck’s medicated pads….obviously if I was someone she had any level of respect for, she woulda kept that shit to herself. Instead she’s asking me, because she knows I am not in her socio-economic class. I guess Alba forgets where her Spic ancestors are from and the shit they had to eat before raising her in an upper middle class home that allowed her to run after her acting dream so here is Alba sitting on her phone like this poor Korean woman isn’t worth her time as she files down her toes.

Now, I would let Alba talk on her phone while flinging her shit at me as I was dress up like a little school girl getting raped by her AIDS infected boyfriend just to let me play with her toes, and I am not a foot fetishist but that is besides the point, I think.

Bonus Alba at the Spic Awards

Bonus Number 2 Alba with her Rich Lame Boyfriend who some stalker is gonna kill thinkin’ he’s got a chance with this bitch, that stalker may be you….

Another Bonus Alba in a Pink Shirt

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A couple of weeks ago I made a post comparing Jessica and Ashlee and I said that Ashlee is the ugly younger sister who is trying to live up to her sister’s good, big breasted looks. But today we learn that Jessica’s big breasts have been smoke and mirrors, the fuckers hang off her body like my shit hangs off my ass hair, which although seems really sexy, is actually pretty gross but all part of having bad hygiene. Anyway, Ashlee’s insecurities and raging success as a singer has allowed her to purchase a new nose and bitch is lookin’ good. I would argue that today Ashlee looks better than Jessica. I am pretty inconsistent…I realize that, but Ashlee NOSE best.

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So girls with big tits have an issue and that issue is keeping them perky as the girls age. Jessica’s probably 25 or 30 by now and that is the age that a woman’s body starts fallin’ apart. I don’t want to be the prick who always talks shit about hot girls, because people don’t seem to be too responsive to me comparing people like Johansson to fat strippers, they think it’s a cry for attention…which it isn’t, so I am just gonna leave it at this…big tits and age means nipples aimin to the ground and that is as hot as my year in prison. So no matter how hot a bitch is, that’s just the way things end up.

Nick was probably smart to get out when he had the chance, is all i am saying….I remember when I used to date a girl with these massive tits. All I was thinking was that I should marry her to make love to those tits every day, I could use them as pillows and drink holders and I could knock a bitch up and make the motherfuckers even bigger but then one day, I panicked. I knew these perfect tits would get sloppy. Shit happens. Right Jessica?

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So girls with big tits have an issue and that issue is keeping them perky as the girls age. Jessica’s probably 25 or 30 by now and that is the age that a woman’s body starts fallin’ apart. I don’t want to be the prick who always talks shit about hot girls, because people don’t seem to be too responsive to me comparing people like Johansson to fat strippers, they think it’s a cry for attention…which it isn’t, so I am just gonna leave it at this…big tits and age means nipples aimin to the ground and that is as hot as my year in prison. So no matter how hot a bitch is, that’s just the way things end up.

Nick was probably smart to get out when he had the chance, is all i am saying….I remember when I used to date a girl with these massive tits. All I was thinking was that I should marry her to make love to those tits every day, I could use them as pillows and drink holders and I could knock a bitch up and make the motherfuckers even bigger but then one day, I panicked. I knew these perfect tits would get sloppy. Shit happens. Right Jessica?

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I already know this week’s winner of the “Comment of the Week Contest”. Send in your mailing address and we’ll think about sending you a t-shirt or to jail. Cuddles.

Dear Jeezus, while you are on the subject of thongs and being an expert in such things I was wondering if you have seen or know if thongs for 8 to 10 year old girls are currently being produced or worn by afore mentioned subjects?

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I only get about 3 emails a day, so when they include attachments, I get all excited, thinking that they may be from my ficticious female readers with hot bodies and a love for getting naked for me, but it never is it’s usually just a virus, and not the kind attached to a vagina. This email is actually about some dude’s night out using pheromone sprays. It’s not that interesting, but neither are you so go fuck yourself and die. Cuddles.

Jesus,

I have been reading your site for months, it brings me hours of entertainment followed by days of depression(HA!). I wanted to let you know that I bought some pherlure through your site last week. Here are some pics of me making out with the chick. TRUST ME when I say this, she looked a hell of a lot better in the dark and with a few drinks in me. Don’t worry, I didn’t end up fucking her because I have standards and she has a black boyfriend and a kid. It was a great way to start this bottle. I’ll be going out tonight and if my friend gets pics of me in action and if the chicks aren’t too ugly, I’ll send them your way.

Post this if you want and keep up the site.

Cuddles,
Zack

I love it when I see my readers dropping my catch phrases, it makes me feel like I have had some kind of useless impact on society. If you want in on this, check out this site.

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