I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2005

01

Dec

I am – American Apparel Girl On Myspace

Do you ever flip through a magazine and think to yourself how badly you want to contact the bitches that grace the ads of the magazines? Yeah, neither have I. But I did come across an American Apparel bitch on Myspace. The beauty of American Apparel is that they get the girls who work in their stores to pose for their ad campaign. The girls do it for free, just happy to help the cult they are part of, and excited that 35 year old drunken mexicans would be jerking off to their pics if they weren’t impotent. I assume that this bitch isn’t one that Dov Charney, the pervert behind the brand’s been shovin’ his dick inside, but when you’re the David Coresh of the motherfucker, you kinda get the chance to get your dick up in all the cooter you pay 7 dollars an hour too, especially the wet backs that work in the factories, or thai sweatshop workers AA now employs since they found it more “Cost Effective”. I don’t have a social consciousness. I support fucking your payroll, and gettin them to prance around in their panties. Dov – Big up yourself.

I am lazy today – not feeling too funny so here’s this bitch VANESSA ON MYSPACE

Be sure to send her dirty messages from me. AND I just contributed to your fame, bitch. CUDDLES.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Sam Heuston Topless On Beach

So she’s another overnight celeb on a reality tv show with fake titties and a love for getting naked on the beach. Even though she’s from the UK and they don’t have a sun. I got nothing against girls who get naked on the beach, even if they have fake titties, or if they are on Big Brother but I do have a problem with girls who do not get naked on the beach. I don’t really understand why bathing suits are still necessary. I would be happy being surrounded by a bunch of naked chicks, even if they were fat. I mean my wife’s a bit of a pig, I am over the whole every bitch has to look like a supermodel stage of my life, as long as they have a cooter, I am in the school that every bitch needs to get naked – and by bitch I mean you. Cuddles.

For more info on this girl, go Here(Her Profile via Big Brother Official Site)

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Naomi Watts Nipple

Naomi Watts is in King Kong. King Kong is going to be a huge movie. I am posting pics of her nipples for good search engine results, and not cuz I like her, because seriously dude, bitch looks like she’s in her first tri-mester, not that I am against a pregnant woman – or a robust muff gut, but I am against British bitches cuz I don’t understand their accents. I am not really as cultured as I come across on this site. Tea is for fucking Fops who would be better off with a little anal insertion from their tennis partner. That was a gay joke that totally didn’t work out for me – but I am drunk and don’t feel comfortable pressing “BACKSPACE”.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Kelly Hu Asian Nipple

I have an internet friend and his name is Vit. And motherfucker always beats me to the celeb titty shots – and gets all the cred for it from the bigger sites. I don’t get mad about that, because I am lazy and don’t care all that much about traffic, but figure since I don’t know who this bitch Kelly Hu is, and since my site’s pretty much about to die, I’ll give Vit that last bit of love I can – before the only reader left here is me cuz I know I’ll be too damn lazy to send him a click…..

That’s my story… go to

TAXIDRIVERMOVIE

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Jennifer Love Hewitt Hanes Her Way

Ghost Whisperer is the number 1 show according to the preview. I have never seen it and I have never heard anyone even bring it up. I guess it’s number 1 amongst people I don’t really hang with. You know the kind of person who doesn’t drink, watches shows like Buffy and The Gilmore Girls. The kind of person who lives with his parents, collects action figures, has never felt a boob – not even at the strip club cuz dude’s scared of strip clubs….I have a feeling that’s the kind of person watching Ghost Whisperer.

These are Hanes Her Way ads featuring Jennifer Love. Who better than America’s Virgin to represent underwear that has the capacity to keep you a virgin. It’s just that powerful, cuz no one really wants to fuck their mom…expcept you – weirdo.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Gisele Done Fixin’ Her Tits

If I was a lame internet person on a message board or running a shitty celeb site I’d say “CAPTION THIS” and all you fuckers would leave 100 comments about your stupid little ideas, none of which would make me even crack a smile, because I am an asshole like that. So instead of saying Caption This, I will say, Gisele has a slammin body. We know she’s from Brazil and Aids is out of control along with man-girls – but even if Gisele had cock and Aids – I’d take my chances and give her a raw dog – because she’s just that slammin’. End of story.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Gisele Done Fixin' Her Tits

If I was a lame internet person on a message board or running a shitty celeb site I’d say “CAPTION THIS” and all you fuckers would leave 100 comments about your stupid little ideas, none of which would make me even crack a smile, because I am an asshole like that. So instead of saying Caption This, I will say, Gisele has a slammin body. We know she’s from Brazil and Aids is out of control along with man-girls – but even if Gisele had cock and Aids – I’d take my chances and give her a raw dog – because she’s just that slammin’. End of story.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – SexWrecks Writer of the Day


I wrote for Fleshbot for a while this summer, before that cunt Violet Blue complained to my man Jonno about the fact that I wasn’t a trained sex writer. For the record, I hate cunts who take their fucking line of work too seriously, and I am not a trained writer in anything not just sex. Point is, you are illegitimate, like 3 of my kids I pretend don’t exist, stop trying to legitimize your perversion and leave me the fuck alone. Keep your complaining to your Aids clinician when your lesions get out of hand, hooker.

Point of that was to say, I don’t read sex blogs much anymore, but I did come across a girl on MySpace who had semi-nude pics. I was like, “Girl, Send me the real deal”, because I fucking love nude pics and she did. Along with an article she wrote for SexWrecks, a site I know, but don’t read, cuz I am lazy.

Point of the story is go to SexWrecks, read her article, cuz I am trying to make this bitch famous. If you aren’t interested, that’s fine. You can always go fuck yourself.

A story about anal and cocaine

OR do what I did and add her to MySpace

I don’t think people even read my site anymore….

Posted in:stepFAME|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Fergie’s Salami

I assume this is old. I haven’t seen it before, but I am not the most up to date person on the internet. I see a tit here and a tit there and I don’t remember what tits I’ve seen and what tits I’ve posted. Either way, Fergie has a slammin’ body, whether it’s cocaine induced or not. I don’t care if bitch doesn’t eat or if her humps annoy the fuck out of me, or even that her face looks like my toilet bowl after a binge drinking session and some ectasy. Whatever, who cares about the face when it is slammed in the mud….more importantly, who cares about the cooter when you are impotent. Either way, her nip’s like Salami and my fat wife loves salami, so that’s why this here’s posted. Happy Anniversay, you cunt.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2005

28

Nov

I am – Fergie's Salami

I assume this is old. I haven’t seen it before, but I am not the most up to date person on the internet. I see a tit here and a tit there and I don’t remember what tits I’ve seen and what tits I’ve posted. Either way, Fergie has a slammin’ body, whether it’s cocaine induced or not. I don’t care if bitch doesn’t eat or if her humps annoy the fuck out of me, or even that her face looks like my toilet bowl after a binge drinking session and some ectasy. Whatever, who cares about the face when it is slammed in the mud….more importantly, who cares about the cooter when you are impotent. Either way, her nip’s like Salami and my fat wife loves salami, so that’s why this here’s posted. Happy Anniversay, you cunt.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted