The highlight of the weekend wasn’t as much a highlight as it was a disappointment. I was drunk. My friend went outside to smoke. I stayed inside to drink. He witnessed a 20 year old girl, wasted off her fucking ass, jack up her skirt and start pissin everywhere, her bald pussy for all to […]

I made it to the second round of Charlie Sheen’s internship. I am pretty sure everyone who applied did. I am pretty sure this site is just a fucking ad campaign that paid Charlie Sheen a lot of money – to get a lot of submissions…. Now they have my fake education and fake previous […]

Not sure if you heard, but there was an earthquake and Tsunami in Japan. I think it may have been set off as a distraction from Charlie Sheen…or maybe from the oil trying to kill the electrical while distracting from their wars in Arab countries….and the whole thing makes me want to watch Japanese puke […]

Here are the stepLINKS!!!! I thought about writing more but figured why the fuck bother….the only exciting thing that happened to me was when I was walking the dog and an old guy with a can outwalked me, motherufcker just passed me reminding me how fucking out of shape and near death I am……..which is […]

I didn’t get the Charlie Sheen internship. My campaign didn’t work out as planned. Do people even read this site? I get nothing from you idiots…. Now I gotta find a new meal ticket and while I do that, I’m either going to nap or drink. As a poverty barn hermit, my options are limited…. […]

Is Spring Break still happening? Everyday is Spring Break for me, I mean without the wet t-shirt contest, but with the wet boxer contest that I’m usually the only contestant in…. The high light of the day was that I applied to be Charlie Sheen’s intern. I’m pretty sure I won’t get it cuz I […]

Like Charlie Sheen, or as I like to call him, the new Chuck Norris of the internet joke world, I have one speed. One gear. Pretty slow. I’m a lazy man….I like to sleep….so here are my stepLINKS…where other people covered shit I didn’t get to…cuz of that one gear. one speed. Pretty show. #Losing. […]

I wanted to drink windshield washer fluid, but instead did my stepLINKS. Boring. Here what could have been so much better for the haters if I hospitalized for what I had set my mind out to do….not cuz I’m emo and suicidal, but cuz I am like a scientist and this body is a horrible […]

It’s the weekend. Get off the computer. Don’t get off on the computer. Cuz seriously, there are a lot of lonely people out there for you to hang out with that are probably less attractive then the pictures you are in love with on the internet, but real people make you far less pathetic… But […]