I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2024

11

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Doing Fitness of the Day

I realized that I am an old weathered fuck when I referred to a mom with a hot ass with her 20-something year old daughter with a hot ass as “girls”….meaning I didn’t consider the mom to be aged out or rotted out or near expired despite having had a kid and that really goes against everything I’ve ever known about myself.

If the ass is still hot at 50, I guess I’ll accept the abuse the body has gone through and treat it like it’s not dead….I guess in a way, I’m a necrophiliac like that….you know they are dead, but you don’t care.

Jessica Alba is holding onto the old lady being hot dream, she works her ass off at it, and documents it….with her tits out…making it more tolerable….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

04

Jan

Jessica Alba Does Fitness on an Exercise Bike of the Day

Jessica Alba…

Billionaire dot com tycoon, who was one of the first unimpressive celebrities to hop onto the social media and internet hustle with some direct to consumer brands, something that I probably wouldn’t have expected to work as well as it did, probably part of the reason I’m not a dot com anything, but maybe a troll hiding in the fucking basement of the internet eating the table scraps left behind from the actual players, but really, Alba was boring, she’s a shitty actress, her fan base was a bunch of virgin nerd film people who thought she was the next messiah or that her tits were….

Well, she’s still producing content, probably to push sales to projects she has equity in, like with this WEDNESDAY fitness video of her on the spin bike, breaking a sweat, the face looking a little too much like Khloe Kardashian than you’d want Jessica Alba to look, but it’s the era of muppets so be happy the mom of 3-4 is vain enough to not have a massive gunt hanging over the cunt…

Fitness is hot…even when Jessica Alba is not so hot anymore…

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2023

13

Apr

Jessica Alba Bikini of the Day

Jessica Alba is hanging with some Xena Warrior Princess, or CHYNA from the WWE, RIP DICK CLIT, looking bitch on the rocks.

You have to wonder if this is a tactic to make her look skinny and fit as her friend’s front leg cellulite ….not that the friend is all that bad, she’s just a lot bigger in swimsuit bottoms than the sluttier, racier ALBA, who you know believes all the hype she’s had as the hot chick, her bank account proves it….

The first to Direct to Consumer celebrity brands besides all the old hags on QVC matters and so do her mom in a bikini pics….even though she’s old, probably run through a filter, I’m good with it.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Jessica Alba

2022

19

Sep

Jessica Alba Upskirt of the Day

Jessica Alba is bringing the goods that most dot com tech billionaires don’t bring, which is probably a good thing, because the idea of seeing some of those nerds in provocative poses is disturbing, but since Alba started out a slut, who didn’t get naked in the movies, but who was cast as the hot chick, since she was the hot chick, and the only reason she exists, or was able to make that dot com billions was off the back of her hotness, it seems like she’s finally coming back into herself, something that you would do, if your dick reached your asshole!

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Jessica Alba

2022

20

Jul

Jessica Alba Bikini of the Day

Dot Com Direct to Consumer Billionaire who is in her mid-40s and a mom of a bunch of kids has really managed to take playing the overhyped hot girl in movies, who I guess couldn’t act, to the fucking bank at the right time in the internet, becoming the face of a brand called HONEST that you know wasn’t honest at all, but they pretended to be, and that’s all that really matters…..which inspired every other celeb to look to social media brands as the answer to make them even richer than they already are because they are either addicted to money and can never have enough of it….or it’s just so fucking easy to print money off the internet when you’re a celebrity with an audience….forcing brands to partner up with you where you call the shots because you hold the power because you drive the crazy level of sales because you’ve amassed a bunch of retards with credit cards who do what you say like lemming groupie puppets….

It’s basically the reason Bella Hadid exists as a top model….while being terrifying to look at…..

But for Alba, pretty impressive, only because otherwise she’d be running a MILF onlyfans, at least based on her acting career…and the stories I’ve heard about her being a massive slut who cheats on her husband like he’s a cuck…but those are just stories and stories aren’t always real…and either are instagram bikini pics thanks to the photoshop.

In hindsight, Alba was a lot of marketing hype, pretty average looking compared to what is out there now, but at the time she was massive and we only had access to what they told us was hot, so there’s a legacy in staring at her titties in bikini like they were those bent over bikini papaparazzi pics that went viral back in 2005….google em.


JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2022

28

Apr

Jessica Alba Refrigerating Her Old Vagina of the Day

When your bread starts getting funky, or really any food that you don’t want to have spoil, you throw it in the fridge… it’s basically the reason humans invented fridges….

Get an extra week out of the food…make it last just a little bit longer………

So Old Mom Box Alba is applying that same science, logic and technique to her pussy, by doing an ice bath to hopefully freeze and preserve the goods so that she can be hot, jerked off to, despite being a billionaire mom, for as long as she fucking can, because being hot is important these people, that’s why they’ve all jacked their faces up to muppet proportions, committed to fitness and diet, vanity is important and I don’t love it, but it’s better than the alternative….haggard.

What it comes down to is that she’s still Alba and that may be all some of you old timers need.

To See Some More Pics of her Old Ass in the Bikini CLICK HERE

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2021

17

May

Jessica Alba Bikinis of the Day

I don’t know what step cells Jessica Alba is travelling to Mexico to ingest, or if she’s just got pregnant a few times in order to eat her fetus, you know the youth serum, I just know that after a bunch of kids and being in her 40s, should probably not look like this….

Sure, the tits could be fake, the face injected with fillers, the body just skinny and not actually toned, or maybe she’s at that part of menopause where they get the testosterone up to hold muscle mass before during into a biological dude hormonally….

She’s just made 100 million dollars with her HONEST brand, which as anyone has told me means it’s likely not very honest at all….like when people say “TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH”…or “TRUST ME”…they are implying there is reason to not trust you but the masses who are morons will just subscribe because they don’t look past the surface…

People were disappointed about her 100 million dollar payout, they all thought she was a billionaire, and not making that billion seems unfortunate, but she likely still owns 20 percent of the company, that is now probably evaluated at multiple billions of dollars, the 100,000,000 was just for what they gave up when they went public, assuming I know anything about investing which I don’t….

PLUS, she’s likely had a fat salary since day one, now a fatter salary and she can probably charge the company for any social posts….

I assume she’ll likely get back into Hollywood, making movies, not that she was ever good at it, but she was always hot at it…unfortunatley never naked hot, but still hot…and seeing her repose in Miami because her life is likely a struggle full stress…all that money is always stressful…even when you have staff do everythinf for you so you can focus on looking good as a 40 something mom of 3-4…depending if you count the one they use for stem cells.

To SEE the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2021

01

Feb

Jessica Alba Twerk of the Day

Jessica Alba is everyone’s favorite Herpes Simplex Virus carrier…that I guess happened when she was fucking Derek Jeter…but likely before…you know Hollywood likes to have herpes because these people are all low lives, just rich versions of street whores…

Alba was lucky enough to be cast as the hot chick in the movies, because every movie needs the hot chick, and she brought a lot of boners to the men of her era…all while never doing nude scenes, or really any movie worth watching…but who needs skills or talent in an industry that doesn’t require talent…you just need the media to hype you up into thinking you are the hot chick…

She’s a mom, her husband is rumored to be a cuck and she still fucks around according to my inside sources…not that I care about that…she’s old.

She’s also a dot com billionaire where her best acting performance to date has been acting as the boss of Honest Company when you know there’s actual people running it.

She’s also big into TikTok which is weird since it is Chinese Spyware, but I guess it’s all marketing for her bullshit brand that pretends to be organic or healthy but has been proven time and again to be shit…but the internet is filled with idiots who buy anything they are told is good for them or the environment despite being. made in Chinese sweatshops…

She’s clearly not very good at twerking and the only thing she’s good or was smart enough to do was launch that internet brand when she was still hyped…before EVERY celeb had a brand…paving the way for celebrity brands everywhere cuz of the success she had….so we can all thank Alba for GOOP…and Kate Hudson’s Fabletics and all the other instagram brand cash grabs everyone does…because CONSUMERISM is real…you can only feel real happiness when you overpay for a product that Alba is pushing…

Maybe, if this was a mom in a bikini twerk, I’d be more hyped on Alba still existing….but instead I see garbage.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2020

29

Jun

Jessica Alba Titty Bounce of the Day

Jessica Alba Titty Bounce

I don’t really know how we live in a society that is so fucking stupid that not only do we all have tracking devices in our pockets because of our need to stay connected with each other…or because they are disguised as portable cameras that you can capture pics of yourself for when staying connected with each other….so insecure and pathetic that the idea of being “alone” terrifies us….

More importantly, I don’t really know how we live in a society where we can open the door to CHINA, after everything we know about CHINA, whether you believe it or not, they manufacture your goods, they are richer than you, they have all your trade secrets, and are better than you…whether you believe in CHINA being a threat or not…they execute their own politicians who misbehave…it’s a different culture…but yeah…you’ll download an app from CHINA to either watch people lip sync and dance on….or produce videos of yourself lip syncing or dancing…in a “whatever, if they want to track me, let them, I need to dance motherfucker…on Camera…like my life is a variety show”…

Then you see characters like Jessica Alba, who is rich as shit off a “Tech Company”…who was rich as shit off a low level “hot chick” celebrity in movies…who never got naked….and it’s just like “why the fuck is she that in need of being watched”….it’s pretty embarrassing, whether you jerk off to her or not….like grow up you dumb bitch, be a fucking adult…who is producing more responsible, compelling, thought provoking content than dumb choreogrpahy….if she wants to do dance videos…do them on her HONEST company website….it’s all so mindless, stupid…they are KEEPING us dumb…

Jessica Alba Titty Bounce

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2020

02

Apr

Is Jessica Alba a Chinese Operative of the DAy

Jessica Alba is a 300 year old actor from many years ago. She is seen here dancing on TikTok while on homequarantine in what you would call clickbait, but what I call working for the Chinese.

I can not confirm that this is the Jessica Alba who pretends to have a billion dollar brand, where many of her products are likely made in China, where she probably embezzles or shelters money with her Chinese Factory owner partners. These people are scammers that is why they are which.

I can not confirm that this is not some Chinese made sex doll, the future of sex, all animatronic and embarassing.

All i can confirm is that it is posted on Chinese Spyware website, where they watch all of you die off through dance…dance to the death WHITE AMERICANS…when they aren’t tracking your every move….

Then again, she may not be a sex doll, but the real Alba, who just WORKS for the CHinese company as a bandleader or a camp councillor designed to encourage all you 40 year olds to sign up and dance…

They saw all the moms takeover facebook, now it is TikTok Time, it’s more effective in their spying!!

Posted in:Jessica Alba