Asshole Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Asshole Category

2009

May

Christian Audigier on a Boat of the Day

You wanna know what this is a picture of? A motherfucker giving all you fucking assholes the fuckin’ finger. He is laughing that such a stupid concept like a tattoo on a t-shirt can turn into a fucking revolution where every fucking Chachi from Los Angeles to Middle America to fuckin’ Europe and Australia are rockin’ his shit and paying huge money for it. We’re talking paying 200 dollars or more for a 3 dollar t-shirt, a fuckin t-shirt you fucking assholes, and now the cocksucker is popping fuckin’ bottles on yachts because of it, since he’s the master fucking manipulator and you are just a fucking idiot buying bottle service, throwing napkins at the crowd, screaming Bob Sinclair at the top of your fucking lungs, when dumpin goose on idiot girls with fake tits who hang with you because they think that kind of shit is cool, all in your 200 dollar t-shirt and I hate all you

On the positive side on things, because let’s face it, we can’t hate on everything, at least this asshole is as lame as his fucking product lines and his night club, he has his logo tattooed on his back and a lame Faux Hawk like the kids who rock his shit, so he’s keepin’ it real with some decent pussy on his arm, so maybe being a cheesy asshole, not an actual cheesy asshole, like when she doesn’t wash.

Posted in:Asshole|Christian Audigier

2009

Feb

Lily Allen is Furry Fetishist of the Day

6 Comments »

Lily Allen finally found a community that would accept her as a sex object and that is the Furries/Plushies mainly because it covers up her fat body.

In my defense for always calling her out for being fucking ugly, fat and unappealing, the Furries/Plushies community is pretty easy to be desirable in, because it’s one of those things that not that many people are into or even know about, and because it is weird. It’s not the kind of fetish you try out with a girl bring the girl home from the club, because trying to get her into a mascot costume to rub up against her doesn’t always go over well.

Maybe this is just therapy for the loss of her child, you know dressing up like the toys she should be playing with and picking up off the nursery floor. Fucking hippies…

Either way, Lily Allen looks better than ever in this shit, because she’s always had a body that needed to be covered up.. or left in the barn….

Here are some pictures of the Furry Convention because it’s more interesting that Lily Allen
GO

Posted in:Asshole|Lily Allen

2009

Jan

Kanye West is an Asshole of the Day

13 Comments »

I hate Kanye West. You can tell dudes an insecure little pussy with no friends. He just secured a deal with Luis Vuitton to make some hip hop shoes for them, because that’s how these big corporations work, hire a celebrity to be the face to a new direction they are taking their shit.

Now he’s on some ego trip. Like he’s a fashion icon, because not only did his mom suck his dick and make him feel like a star when she was alive, but so did everyone else. He is the kind of guy in dire need of getting beat the fuck up and the only way we can do that is to not buy anything he does, or participate in his music.

That means, everytime it hits the radio, call your radio station and complain. That means standing outside your local record store staging hunger strikes and shit. This motherfucker is detrimental to the world and needs to be stopped.

In this video, he’s decided to joke around about changing his name to Martin Luis the King Jr and I find that offensive. Kanye hasn’t progressed society in anyway, he’s just a little 5 foor 6 cunt with small man syndrome and no mother.

Posted in:Asshole|Kanye West

2009

Jan

Lindsay Lohan is an Asshole of the Day

3 Comments »

So Lohan’s people contacted me today to tell me that Lindsay doesn’t want me going to Sam Ronson’s show in Montreal next week. I didn’t even know he had a fucking show next week. He also plays at all these clubs that I can’t get into so even if I had known, I would have had no fucking plan on going. But I guess in this self absorbed celebrity minds, everything is about them.

I guess it’s funny that Lohan is spending time reaching out to useless people like myself, for obvious self promotion, or maybe it’s all in efforts to keep a short leash on Ronson because she doesn’t work and has a lot of time on her hands. I pretty much told them that we’re not in high school and she can reach out and contact me herself if she has rules set up for me, so that I can laugh in her face and record it. I also said that until she’s making me 3,000,000 dollars a year, I’m pretty much independent and can do whatever the fuck I want and she has no fucking right trying to dictate what I do or where I go. I am pretty insulted that they’d even try to pull that shit on me because it is assuming that I give a shit, which I don’t. Sure, if this was 5 years ago when I was just starting out and Lohan was in her prime, I’d be giving myself high fives for breaking down the walls between nobody and celebrity and I’d feel like I was actually getting out there and not doing this for no reason, but the truth is that celebrities are nobodies too, so I don’t get phased by them but I do get angry when cunts try telling me what to do.

My prediction is they are both on drugs. I just don’t know what drugs they are on. I wasn’t going to write this post, but I am hungover, like seriously fucking hungover and feel like I am dying so I figured why not share the stupidity that is these lesbians.

That said. I still think Lohan is awesome and I want to play connect the dots with my cum and her freckles while Ronson jerks off in the corner….

Posted in:Asshole|Lindsay Lohan

2008

Nov

Ryan Seacrest Doesn’t Care About Dead People of the Day

3 Comments »

When Ryan Seacrest was asked if it was Paula Abdul’s fault some fan killed herself outside of Paula’s house, his reaction was really heart felt, you know like he’s really let the death of one of the American Idol contestants affect him. He says something along the lines of Paula being a sweetheart and it being an isolated incident, something we already knew, because Paula doesn’t have any more fans, all the other ones she had have offed themselves a long time ago, or moved onto more relevant stars, putting their Paula Abdul cutouts album on a shelf next to their action-figure collection, but either way, it looks like he’s more interested in running inside to look at himself in the mirror and that makes him a self-absorbed asshole, and since I jerk off to everything Ryan Seacrest. I figured I’d post this.

Posted in:Asshole|Ryan Seacrest

2008

Oct

Diddy is an Asshole of the Day

8 Comments »

In keeping shit black for my one and only Black Wednesday since starting the site, that will probably end afer this post, I decied to post this video of a manic Diddy at 5 am that he shot for his youtube diaries where bragging that he’s just like all of us, nothing but a man with a dream from Harlem, and now he’s done gone bought a clothing line called Enyce, while American is pretty much dying as the economy explodes, you know just like all of us, sitting on his private jet, paying whores to rub his insane head, spending stupid money, while the rest of us can barely afford a bag of chips and I am not talking the good chips, I am talking the 89 cent no name chips. Then he goes off calling himself the black Buffet repeatedly, because motherfucker’s got an ego, while explaining why he did what he did, pretty much proving the economic crisis works out nicely for the rich, while killin’ off the poor. So maybe Diddy is right, maybe he is just like us, you know considering we can’t afford a pot to piss in, while he owns millions of dollars worth of hip hop gear, but I like to think he’s fuckin’ crazy and needs to be stopped, so if you see any Enyce on special at your local TJ Maxx, don’t buy it, because if you do, you’re just lining this cocksuckers pockets and I think we’ve done enough of that. He’s a fucking rat-faced motherfucker who exploited his friend’s death to end up where he is today, he’s got no fucking soul, but he’s got soles on his 1000 pairs of expensive shoes he keeps in his dressing room. This video offended me, mainly because he was trying to tell me that I should be working at 5 am, because he is and he’s such a fucking success, while I think you should be drinking at 5 am. I guess that’s just one of our many differences. I guess Diddy isn’t quite like me at all.

Posted in:Asshole|Diddy|Puff Daddy|Sean John

2008

Sep

Puff Daddy Is Annoying as Fuck of the Day

11 Comments »

Puff Daddy has an annoying DiddyTV channel on Youtube, and it’s nice to see that he’s really not that successful with it, if I was Diddy and I only had 140,000 views, I’d probably realize that means I am irrelevant. The dude is a rat who rode coattails to get where he is, whether it was with B.I.G. or girls he dated, his music always consistently sucked and he managed to sign some solid acts that made him really rich. In being rich, dude still is a tacky motherfucker no matter how expensive his suit is and this is a video of him flying a commercial airline because gas prices are too high to fly his private jet. I don’t think the gas prices are the real downfall of America, people like Diddy are. This is disgusting excess while people are starving and unable to pay their rent or mortgages but it made me laugh when he says he’s pursuing his acting career, that’s gotta be some kind of joke.

I used to talk to some social climbing jew who lived in New York and consistently banged Diddy when his wife at the time wasn’t around. He’d fly her to San Diego and places like that and would sometimes just get her to stroke his head like some kind of queer. He would always kick her out and wouldn’t pay for her cab and make her take the subway so I don’t think the gas prices are the issue, but Diddy is just a greedy piece of shit.

Either way, this video is offensive to anyone who isn’t worth half a billion dollars and should be reason for you to boycot him and contribute to him losing everything he’s got. It’d be nice to see this piece of shit back in the fuckin’ projects where he belongs.

This video is a week old. But I am slow.

Posted in:Asshole|Puff Daddy

2008

May

Pete Wentz Continues His Joke of the Day

3 Comments »

America’s favorite emo queen Wentz is at his stupidity again. This time he is trying to fuck with the public by pretending to use his bagel as a cell phone. I think he’d be more effective at throwing us all off if he put out a sex tape with Ashlee Simpson proving to the world that he actually has a dick. This little man, or so he claims, annoys the fuck out of me because he’s a fuckin’ fake. The only time I find this kind of thing funny is when it involves drunk crazy homeless people who actually think the phonebooth is an outhouse. This dude thinks he’s more important than he is and his energy as a celebrity would be better spent killing himself.

Posted in:Asshole|Pete Wentz