I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty amazed that Asshole Behind Thongs are still being uploaded to the internet….

You’d assume that everyone, in all their slutty, exhibitionist, sex positive, perverted and empty, trying to fill whatever void and monetize because making sex transactional is cool, even if it’s fucking depressing, because it takes the fun out of it…would just ditch the thong and go full asshole.

This was the subtle tease before the gaping asshole shoots, you know the intro scene to the porno but the sexting version….but like porn before it, at a certain point they drop the story, the mystery, the fantasy and go FULL throat fuck.

The point of the story is…..Thongs are pretty inefficient at covering assholes, which is a good thing to those of us into modesty, since that is modesty, in an era of BIG DILDO IN ASS on a tuesday by a normie who doesn’t want a day job…

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My new post strategy – Just Post the Title of the Post – No One Cares About What I have to Say:

Asshole Behind Thong Thursday of the Day

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Asshole Behind Thong is not such a revolutionary concept, but in the era of not leaving your house because you are lazy, so you just sext strangers and demand nudes from them, instead of trying to meet random people in real life, which could be a brilliant social experiment in an era of hooking up off apps replacing the meeting randomly…but yeah, in the sext era, you want to see a girls asshole, to know you got all of her on your icloud, NO HOLES LEFT BEHIND, and some strangers are shy about a straight up asshole pic…you know it is the orifice that units us, but some assholes are dark, hemorrhoided, a blown out disaster….and people are self conscious about it…..but throw in a thong, and it’s just a panty shot, you can’t even see the pussy…so it is the gateway orifice to more aggressive nudes, or at least a way to see the asshole…

So the flaw in the THONG design is a win for us…

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Thongs prove that the imperfections in design, or the shortcomings in a product, sometimes offer more than expected, and those offereings in this case is letting the girl in the thong assume the position, to show us all her asshole ridge, shit stained and all, while remaining clothed….

The accessible way to show asshole, must be like when they realized that they could use processed cheese waste to make cheese spread….. or like when they they discovered penicillin on a rotting piece of bread…you know but the asshole version…not the fat fuck or modern medicine marvels in humanity, but give the asshole behind the thong a chance, it’s still new and may define humanity in the future…as we all get more and more perverted and DUMBED down…

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I typically like to be the asshole posing behind the thong, not in the thong, that’s queer, but behind it….

Unfortunately for you, the asshole behind the thong today is an actual asshole, which is arguably the window or gateway to the woman’s soul, or maybe more of a blackhole sucking in all the life around it like some sort of anti-matter project being executed by the creepy satanists in Switzerland who are trying to recreate a black hole here on earth…GREAT IDEA TEAM….like an asshole, it may SUCK us all in, but I guess deal with that when it happens, why worry about things we can’t control….even though we can control them….by NOT playing with shit like that.

Anyway, the thong, a marvel of innovation, not really, but when trying to make the pantyline less offensive, while still giving the pussy something to drip in and soak, instead of the pants or socks…dripping down the leg…that’s less a marvel in design, I’m sure there have been bitches cutting their mom panties into thongs since the dawn of time, thanks to their innate ability to sew, you know cuz they’re women….so more a marvel in marketing….”GRANNY PANTY BAD, THONG GOOD”….all it took to create a billion dollar product category thanks to the female hive mind.

The flaw, which is the win, or the opportunity, is that assholes are TOO big, too round to contain and you can see them through the thong part of the thong, making it a great way for girls to show off their assholes as they do…it’s a generation of selfie porn…so assholes are a key HOLE needed for that.

Here are some assholes behind thongs.

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The thong may have been a conspiracy from the PATRIARCHY who run the UNDERWEAR consortium, or RACKET, or CARTEL depending on who you talk to, because you know there’s a group of perverts at the top of the food chain who own Factories in China and produce UNDERWEAR for the world…people need to catch their genital and asshole drips to SAVE their pants from a SHITTY end.

The Thong now is actually a pretty hot panty, not that I ever hated any panty, but I figure if you can scam a whole GENDER into thinking they NEEDED to swap out their old PANTIES for new skimpier pants..I’m all for it…GET THAT MONEY and let us celebrate by getting to see MORE ass cheek when half naked….I appreciate the THONG more now that it is a socially acceptable bikini bottom….

At the time of THONGs, if you had a bad ass, the thong was almost a disaster…but the bitches kept wearing them.

In this era of sexting, I guess the ladies have realized they can show off their assholes and their thongs, two birds, one stone, feeling clothed, when still showing asshole….which is the most woke, genderless, although woman ASSHOLE is much hotter than man ASSHOLE….ALWAYS….ORIFICE…

So here’s thongs and assholes, and the hype is neither the thong nor the asshole…but the fact that people feel the need to produce this content around what they think is the best version of themselves…THE ASSHOLE MAKING AN APPEARANCE….PEEKING OUT FROM AROUND THE CORNER OF THE THONG….fascinating.

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Asshole Behind Thongs are a wonderful exploration into the thong’s ability to allow you to see asshole while the subject is still technically fully clothed, or half clothed, you know with her panties on….

It is the equivalent of sheer top, or maybe a pair of pants made out of clear plastic, at least where the crotch is so that you can see the cunt, without the owner of the cunt feeling like she’s stripped down, exposed, on some kind of shameless exhibitionist level.

It is one of those “if you sexualize the asshole behind thong, it’s on you, because motherfucker, I’m just in a thong, and that’s my right as a woman, MISOGYNIST”….and I am into it…because I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, the ASSHOLE IS THE WINDOW TO THE SOUL….the UNIFIED anus for a INCLUSIVE AND EQUITABLE utopian world they have planned for us…THEY even wrote books about it….

Just be happy these assholes behind thongs aren’t shitting.

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Thongs, the pussy drip pan panty, because those fucking things are covering much asshole drip….is the MOST inclusive panty around because it allows assholes to wink at each. other in this genderless world…knowing it’s the orifice that unites us in this divided world….I write the same thing about thongs and the asshole behind the thongs every week…WELCOME…it’s been a year or more….nothing left to said…which I guess applies to every post I do…so let’s make a thong joke…

So….a man in a thong, a woman in a thong walk into a bar….after showing their vaccine passport…since social distancing prevents them from shaking hands…masks prevent them from smiling at each other…except with their eyes….they had no choice but to bend over, pull down their pants and show their asshole behind thong..because they are in it together…and need to let each other know..

That joke was terrible…no wonder Jay Leno didn’t hire me as a writer…not that I applied…but it’s the internet…if there was talent here…there would be EMAILS….

The only talent here…is the ASSHOLES….gateway to the fucking soul…window to a shit dick…when the pussy is out of service….FUN.

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Assholes behind thongs…are a reminder to myself that I would like to watch girls doing aerobics in their thongs….and not in an 80s thong over tights kind of way…but in a straight up thong kind of way….because it will give amble opportunity to showcase their assholes in an equitable way, you know make it mandatory for all girls to wear thongs to the fitness class so that there are no non-thong wearers feeling left out….plus the showcasing of their asshole is empowering…like an ADIDAS TITTY AD…it takes all kinds of assholes to make a village..and since everyone has one…it’s only normal for us to “I’ll so you mine if you really want me to, but I’d rather look at yours”…..and I know some non-asshole owner out there thanks to a birth defect or cancer is OUTRAGING out there….”HOW DARE YOU SAY EVERYONE HAS AN ASSHOLE YOU ABLEIST”……

YOU can’t please everyone, but I think ASSHOLES BEHIND THONGS try…and really why wear shorts when you can wear something less constrictive and more exhibitionist in this world of everyone being a exhibitionists, the shorts keep getting shorter and the tighter, we just need to get ahead of this TOGETHER…

Here’s some inspo shots for our THONG FITNESS WORKOUT routine I’m mapping out…

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Thongs may be inefficient in covering the asshole, which some would say justifies paying more for them, because staring at asshole when a girl thinks she’s clothed, even if she knows you can see her asshole…the fact she can pretend that she’s not doing it to show off her asshole…even though everyone loves to show off their asshole…it’s the orifice of the generation, which is funny, since I call them a pussy generation, but in a they are a bunch of pussies….who actually are also CUNTS…and I don’t mean VAGINA…I just mean they probably HAVE vagina….

Anyway, let me see your asshole behind thong….is going to be my first top 40 hit when I decide to become an R&B sensation….on some RUBEN STUDDARD shit.

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