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Archive for the Hayden Panettiere Category

2007

13

Aug

I am – Hayden Panettiere in Some Short Skirt of the Day

hayden_panettiere_shorts_03.jpg

The other day I was walking down the street and saw 2 young girls walking with their mother. They were probably around 15 years old and one of them was wearing a low cut shirt with these massive genetically modified milk titties busting out of it while the other one was wearing the shortest fucking shorts I’ve seen on a girl in a longtime. Her full ass cheeks were hanging out of the bottom and I could tell that these were girls who lost their virginity at 10 and had their first abortion by 12. I am not going to say that I found them hot because I didn’t, I was just fascinated by the fact that their mother allowed this to go down and they weren’t from a trashy family, they looked like they were upper middle class and they were carrying shopping bags from relatively expensive stores and rockin’ expensive watches and shoes.

I am assuming that the mother was just one of those bored housewives who had lost her youth when she got married and is trying to reclaim that shit through her kids who she refuses to discipline because it would make her look uncool to them. She’s one of those best friend mothers who takes her daughter to get her first set of birth control pills, her first AIDS test, who scores her first bag of weed and smokes it with her, who demonstrates how to give a proper blowjob so all the boys like you kind of mom and I guess there’s nothing really wrong with that.

There is however, something wrong with Hayden Panettiere and I can’t put my finger on it. I am thinking it’s the fact that she looks like a stalky midget or some kind of weird bobble head you buy at the dollar store that was made in China and has a high lead count in it poisoning all of us to think she’s a cunt we’d like to slam. I wonder if it’s illegal to say that about someone under 18. I guess I’ll just leave it in and see if the Christian Groups come knocking, but I have a feeling they won’t considering they’ve been molesting pre-pubescents since around the time Jesus started the whole thing…..Cuddles.


Related Posts:
Hayden Panettiere Eating of the Day
Hayden Panettiere Picking Her Wedgie Then Lickin’ Her Hand of the Day
Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day
Hayden Panettiere Lickin’ Ass of the Day

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Shorts|Tits|Troll|Underage|Unsorted

2007

10

Aug

I am – Hayden Panettiere Eating of the Day

hayden_eat_top.jpg

I am not some gay guy who likes to encourage my female friends to not eat because I want to have an anorexic looking sluts as my fashion accessory, I prove that everyday with my wife who is fucking fat but I still stick by her, but maybe I should have been one and it would have prevented the biggest headache of my life.

I didn’t miss having to wipe her ass for her while I was on my trip. I guess the issue is that in life you make choices and as a loyal and committed guy I am forced to stick by her in these final years of her life and if that means wiping her fat ass, or helping her apply topical cream to her rashes caused by bacteria build-up in all those hard to reach areas that are buried beneath her obesity, then I guess I am going to have to tough it out.

I do know that on the trip I found my erection that I had lost so many years ago. It only made a minor appearance but I was fucking blown away and blame the fact that I wasn’t being turned off women by having to be the orderly around here and had time to really absorb what real pussy is like first hand.

Hayden Panettiere is a little troll of a girl who probably should lay off the food a little bit if she ever wants people jerking off to her like they did to Lohan because fat is not hot and it can turn a man impotent and that’s my lesson for today. The other lesson is that if you’re a celebrity and you’re eating a breakfast buffet, you may want to lay off the peanut butter, even if watching you trying to get it off the top of the top of your mouth like a dog, is like porno to me, reality is my wife gained 10 pounds in one week because she had coupons to an all you can eat breakfast place and bitch took those fuckers for a ride and lead me to writing Jiffy a letter about potentially sponsoring her talent to finish off two tubs of that shit in one sitting. Either way, this posts sucks and so do you. Cuddles.


Related Posts

I am – Hayden Panettiere Pickin’ Wedgie Then Licking Hand of the Day
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I am – Hayden Panettiere See Through Dress of the Day
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I am – Hayden Panettiere Lickin’ Ass of the Day
GO

I am – Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day
GO

Posted in:Eating|Fat|Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

31

Jul

I am – Hayden Panettiere Picking Her Wedgie and Licking Her Hand of the Day

Hayden Panettiere

Young girls like Hayden Panettiere become wank fantasies for guys like you because they are young, and therefore you will also assume, easy. Unlike women the your own age, who have standards when it comes to men , young girls like Hayden will overlook the fact that you live with your mom in your childhood bedroom and work at Burger King. They are also really impressed that you own any sort of car, no matter how big a piece of shit it is.

Then you see her picking her wedgie and licking her hand after and realize that even you have standards and your precious fantasies have yet again been crushed by the reality of life, loser.


Related Posts

I am – Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day
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I am – Hayden Panettiere Lickin’ Ass of the Day
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I am – Hayden Panettiere Isn’t Hot But Wears Robes of the Day
GO

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

09

Jul

I am – Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day

hayden_panettiere_bikini_to.jpg

Everyone has been writing about this girl like she’s the next Lohan, I was always confused about it because she looks like a fucking troll. I was thinking that at first she was a make a wish foundation candidate and people were just giving a terminally ill girl her dream, but her career has been too long lived for it to be a make a wish deal and people seem to just ignore the fact that she is or looks disabled.

She does remind me of this one girl I banged once. She was pretty sad and lonely and no one liked her because she was 4 foot 4. She had only had never had a boyfriend, but had sex with anyone willing, unfortunately I was one of those guys. She insisted that I don’t use a condom, and what that happens I insist on using one, because she didn’t know me for more than about 45 mins before ending up naked in the back alley of a bar. Either way, when I was done, I had to tie the condom in a knot and put it in my pocket because I was convinced she was so desperate that she’d take the fucking thing and try to knock herself up.

Either way, to those who find this Panettier bitch hot, here she is half naked.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Hayden Panettiere|Tits|Unsorted

2007

27

Jun

I am – Hayden Panettiere Lickin' Ass of the Day

hayden_ass_lick.jpg

Girls these days are crazy. This Hayden slut has grown up so fast. Bitch is already being funny by licking bronze asses and to me that is one step away from giving rim jobs while jerking off random older men in attempts to further her career and have a good time. This is the kind of joke I’d expect from a middle aged drunk woman at the company Christmas party or at a family wedding, who is all jacked on estrogen therapy to balance out her high testosterone levels leading her to grab her tits and smack her ass while simulating a blowjob on the wine bottle.

I used to watch Oprah and heard all about teens thinking anal sex is safe because they can’t get pregnant and would have parties that if I was there age, wouldn’t get invited to, where they all get together and suck dick. I don’t know how old some of you fucks are, but when I was 17, I don’t think girls shaved their boxes, bikini waxes weren’t common, virginity was and so were bad fit jeans and turtleneck sweaters. Whenever I’d asks girls about masturbating they’d get offended, when I’d get them alone in a room, they would barely want to make out, but on those lucky days they’d let me rub them over their panties. The only blowjobs anyone was getting was from the class whore who was molested by her father and knew all the tricks, but I always stayed away from her….because I felt bad for her. I was never a fan of molestation despite popular belief because I think my stepdaughters are hot.

Speaking of molestation, I was told that I could get arrested for posting pictures of an underage girl doing slutty things on a site that links to porn, I really hope that doesn’t happen because I would hate to get charged with kiddy porn. I know that that is probably the worst fucking crime out there and I always hated creeps that fuck with kids and get off to kids because kids are harmless. The thugs in prison feel the same way as I do and kill motherfuckers who end up there for doing that kind of thing, but I am banking on the fact that Hayden Panettiere is almost 18, makes her own money, does her own thing and where I am from, 14 is legal. So if she does this for a picture, it’s good enough for me to post it. So that’s why these are going up. If anyone asks, I blame Paris Hilton for turning this generation onto being porn stars. Maybe it’ll land her back in prison or at least paying out some Civil Suit when some young girl get AIDS or pregnant by following her lead. If people could bring down Judas Priest for people committing suicide or Marilyn Manson for columbine, someone needs to get on the blame Paris train and make some motherfucking moves.

Posted in:Ass|Hayden Panettiere|Lick|Unsorted

2007

27

Jun

I am – Hayden Panettiere Lickin’ Ass of the Day

hayden_ass_lick.jpg

Girls these days are crazy. This Hayden slut has grown up so fast. Bitch is already being funny by licking bronze asses and to me that is one step away from giving rim jobs while jerking off random older men in attempts to further her career and have a good time. This is the kind of joke I’d expect from a middle aged drunk woman at the company Christmas party or at a family wedding, who is all jacked on estrogen therapy to balance out her high testosterone levels leading her to grab her tits and smack her ass while simulating a blowjob on the wine bottle.

I used to watch Oprah and heard all about teens thinking anal sex is safe because they can’t get pregnant and would have parties that if I was there age, wouldn’t get invited to, where they all get together and suck dick. I don’t know how old some of you fucks are, but when I was 17, I don’t think girls shaved their boxes, bikini waxes weren’t common, virginity was and so were bad fit jeans and turtleneck sweaters. Whenever I’d asks girls about masturbating they’d get offended, when I’d get them alone in a room, they would barely want to make out, but on those lucky days they’d let me rub them over their panties. The only blowjobs anyone was getting was from the class whore who was molested by her father and knew all the tricks, but I always stayed away from her….because I felt bad for her. I was never a fan of molestation despite popular belief because I think my stepdaughters are hot.

Speaking of molestation, I was told that I could get arrested for posting pictures of an underage girl doing slutty things on a site that links to porn, I really hope that doesn’t happen because I would hate to get charged with kiddy porn. I know that that is probably the worst fucking crime out there and I always hated creeps that fuck with kids and get off to kids because kids are harmless. The thugs in prison feel the same way as I do and kill motherfuckers who end up there for doing that kind of thing, but I am banking on the fact that Hayden Panettiere is almost 18, makes her own money, does her own thing and where I am from, 14 is legal. So if she does this for a picture, it’s good enough for me to post it. So that’s why these are going up. If anyone asks, I blame Paris Hilton for turning this generation onto being porn stars. Maybe it’ll land her back in prison or at least paying out some Civil Suit when some young girl get AIDS or pregnant by following her lead. If people could bring down Judas Priest for people committing suicide or Marilyn Manson for columbine, someone needs to get on the blame Paris train and make some motherfucking moves.

Posted in:Ass|Hayden Panettiere|Lick|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere is Playing of the Day

hayden_panettiere_playingto.jpg

These pictures are to remind you that lookin at this girl in a sexual way is kinda sleazy. She’s just a normal girl, doing normal things on set, like playing with the other kids. Pics of her simulating some lesbian shit made their rounds yesterday and figured this was a decent way to bring it all down a notch by making you feel guilty for jerking off to her….

I was talking to a girl about how I want to lose weight and get a bigger penis, she told me that it’s pretty much too late for me to start now and that dreams of porn dick are pretty useless considering nothing out there is proven to work. I don’t actually get hard anymore, like I tell you all the time, but there was a time that lasting relationships never happened for me, I used to think it was because the girls were hookers and just wanted my 50 dollars, but now I realize if I had a stacked dick, maybe they would have turned a few tricks for free, you know cuz they loved it so much.

I figured the best advice for you, since you have a small penis, is to find a girl with a shallow g-spot, one of those bitches with an abnormal vagina that can’t take much more than a pinky. Since that’s hard, you can just run after a girl who is about 4 ft tall, I’m talking midgets, then maybe you’ll fill her up to her belly button like you always wished you could.

That’s pretty much all I have to say about that and remember you’re the one reading this, meaning the issue isn’t with what I write about, it’s with you taking the time to really take in the shit I say. It’s all pretty embarrassing for you.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

10

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere Isn't Hot But Wears Robes of the Day

hayden_panettiere_robe2.jpg

Here are some pictures of Hayden Panettiere on the set of something they are filming and she isn’t very hot even in her robe. She looks a little like a troll or a man or I am not really sure what, but she’s not really up to my standards even though robes in public bring back memories of romantic hotel getaways and by romantic hotel getaways I mean running after girls who escape from my roofie sex parties. Sure, she made for a cute kid, but way too much hype was sent her way and like a lot of cute kids, they grow up to be funny looking circus freaks.

Speaking of circus freaks, I was talking to some dude about banging an amputee and whether or not you keep the prosthetic leg on or not while you’re doing it. If you did leave it on, it’d be like banging a virgin with a condom on. It’s pretty obvious that you take advantage of all the amazing positions you can get her in, otherwise why be banging a fucking amputee. If you don’t want to cum all over a stump, you could just bang someone will all their parts in place. I guess what I didn’t really think about was that you aren’t really one to be selective so if you were banging an amputee, it’d probably be because she was the last one standing/leaning at the party, because everyone else thought banging an amputee was gross. You take what you can get and that’s what I like about you.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

10

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere Isn’t Hot But Wears Robes of the Day

hayden_panettiere_robe2.jpg

Here are some pictures of Hayden Panettiere on the set of something they are filming and she isn’t very hot even in her robe. She looks a little like a troll or a man or I am not really sure what, but she’s not really up to my standards even though robes in public bring back memories of romantic hotel getaways and by romantic hotel getaways I mean running after girls who escape from my roofie sex parties. Sure, she made for a cute kid, but way too much hype was sent her way and like a lot of cute kids, they grow up to be funny looking circus freaks.

Speaking of circus freaks, I was talking to some dude about banging an amputee and whether or not you keep the prosthetic leg on or not while you’re doing it. If you did leave it on, it’d be like banging a virgin with a condom on. It’s pretty obvious that you take advantage of all the amazing positions you can get her in, otherwise why be banging a fucking amputee. If you don’t want to cum all over a stump, you could just bang someone will all their parts in place. I guess what I didn’t really think about was that you aren’t really one to be selective so if you were banging an amputee, it’d probably be because she was the last one standing/leaning at the party, because everyone else thought banging an amputee was gross. You take what you can get and that’s what I like about you.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

05

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere See Through Dress of the Day

hayden_panettiere__top.jpg

The day I realized there was no such thing as innocence was when I saw a Nun with a coldsore. I guess she could have got it by sucking a herpes ridden cock for Jesus, but I can only assume she was one of those reformed nuns, the kind of girl who was real fucking bad in her youth and had only one option to turn things around when she was a little older and that was through god. I guess she could have also got the cold sore from sharing that dirty communion cup they make everyone share or maybe even caught it in a restaurant from dirty utensils, but for this post she was a whore who turned shit around, because here are pictures of that bobble head Hayden Panettiere wearing a see through dress. I haven’t decided if see through makes a whore, but judging how these starlets are livin’, it’s only a matter of time before she’ll be tending to her herpes, only they may not even be on her mouth. This is when I say “her other lips”, but get made at myself for being such a cunt.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted