Anyone who’s been reading this site the last 6 years knows I love Lindsay Lohan. She entertains me whether she’s out doing heroin or fucking Samantha Ronson dick like it was a pussy or being used by everyone around her for their personal gain – she’s all round awesome…

Some days I only tweet to her and get ignored. Back in the day I left her phone messages of love and got ignored. I’ve even hung out with her in an erotic setting years ago….and got ignored. I like to think it is her way of flirting….

Like this is her way of getting noticed. She knows how it works. She knows the industry. She knows her tits are her best friend. She is obvious, clever, and pretty much put it all out there already, making this tame and obvious, but a good start in the right direction for me…

I’m sold. I love these full always and forever, amazing tear drop implants. They look so authentic and never get old….

Yay to Lohan my internet girlfriend who denies our internet love.

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I heard that Samantha Ronson, the ugliest human in the history of humans, was tweeting about being in bed with Lohan last week and figured that meant they were both prepping their quest back to being the talk of the boring lesbian town. You know bottom feeding lesbian dykes in Hollywood who need each other to matter.

So I’m not suprised these hot pics of Lohan in some photoshoot that may or may not be from her new “sober” days she’s faking, or if they are from her “heroin” days she couldn’t keep hidden and had to fake rehab to clean up her image, I just know that it makes me wish I was Sam Ronson’s dick for a night…herpes scabs, lesions and all.

I’m a fan of Lohan and everything she does on her quest to dying before 30. It’s pretty much just that simple…

You can tell it is her from the cigarettes and redbull product placement, in case you weren’t sure it was her.

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I love watching Lohan tease her lips with her fingers like they were Samantha Ronson’s coke covered dick on her pussy…but maybe I’m just looking too deep into what is probably just a compulsion of an ex drug addict soon to be current drug addict replacing one habit with another, maybe she’s just rubbing the coke on her mouth to get the numb feeling cuz it isn’t actually doing the coke, or maybe she just likes trying to find feeling in her fake lips, or maybe she’s just trying to play cute, like a little girl lost in the amusement park doing some coppertone girl shit, Lohan lost the cute angle when she took 8 dozen dicks in her while feeding a alcohol and substance abuse issue over the course of the last 5 years, that whole cute thing doesn’t work on washed up crackheads who smell like stale cum and rotting flesh and the real issue here is why the fuck am I analyzing it, I should just stare at it, then move on, cuz this is Lohan we’re talking about, she hardly exists and could be diddling her pussy and I’d find it boring and obvious because unfortunately we can’t bring back the Lohan that Wilmer Valderamma ruined, cuz that was the Lohan we liked the best….this other Lohan is just a fucking downer…with amazing tits…which I guess make her better than you….but she never fucking shows them…making the whole thing very very confusing…like why I am up at 9 am. Fuck.

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It turns out that I am still a fan of Lindsay Lohan and not because I think to myself that she’ll never make a comeback so I have hope in being friends with her dyke pussy….because I have a feeling this whole drug addict thing was strategy for her to make a comeback like she was Mickey Rourke, to make us really realize the damage and abuse she endured from Mickey Mouse, giving us the perception that she’s some kind of artist who was misunderstood and robbed of her childhood, bullshit cuz Hollywood is full of shit…..

I am still a fan of Lindsay Lohan because when she shows off her little crackhead legs, in her little crackhead shorts, rocking her little lesbian boots, like some teenage girl runaway rockin’ stipper fake lips, cuz she made some choices when she was down on her luck to suck dick in back alleys before losing it all leaving her useless, damaged and to sad to shower…..she is pornography to me….

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I was hoping these pictures of Lohan going to the gym would involve a little more pussy-hugging pants, cuz pussy hugging pants is the only good thing about going to the gym, I mean other than the endorphines Lohan’s therpay team is hoping kick in, so that she doesn’t get back on HORSE but then I realized she’s a fake lesbian and by default her vagina has figuratively closed the fuck up, I mean other than when Sam Ronsn shoves her head insider her in some reverse-birthing fetish cuz lesbians are weird…

These pictures suck, but then again so does Lohan, especially now that she’s sober and boring….and I guess so I am….See Lohan, we are connected at the soul.

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There’s a bullshit staged scandal that Lohan moved next to Ronson and Ronson did know about it and Lohan isn’t gonna back down and move away because Lohan wants to be in Venice to familiarize herself with her surroundings so that when she runs out of money, she will know the best corners on the strip to busk for money on, you know a little song and dance performance next to the black guy with no teeth singing Bob Marley songs for tourists eating their hot dogs…….

The truth is that Lohan and Ronson are in on this together, because together, the media cares about them and apart they both fade in boring crackhead lesbian obscurity….

The whole thing is so tired and done that it makes me want to take a nap….I just know their hustle, I’ve met both of them and they are both lying bitches. True story.

Here are some pics of Lohan cuz the idea of her is better than the actual her…

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I pretty much forgot about Lindsay Lohan. She’s been a huge disappointment in my life. Nothing but let downs. Her prime was when she was drugged out and partying nightly, making a fool out of herself, pretending to fuck girls who looked like dudes but who were riding her coattail for fame of their own, when really all she was doing was letting her eat her out, which is pretty much just masturbation, without all the work…..

Her name doesn’t even enter my brain, like it did back when she used to text me random things daily cuz she was fucking high, confused and amazing…

This whole rehab shit is fucking garbage and I may or may not appreciate seeing her in tight clothes or half naked for old times, but she’s pretty much dead to me.

Happy fucking New Year….here’s some photoshopped Lohan to remind you of how things are only gonna get worse for you..

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In my mind, Lindsay Lohan is a Christmas miracle that keeps on giving. I am not talking about her herpes, that is controlled thanks to valtrex. I am talking about her as a person. She just constantly comes out of the woodwork with her amazing fucking tits that I regret not making her show me the time I snuck into some party to hang out with her when she was in Montreal and she was too friendly to get me kicked out, because everything about this girl is amazing, except maybe that she gave me a wrong number and I’ve never been able to reconnect our love at first sight from that lovely night, not that that’s never happened before, the fake number thing is almost obvious…..not that that would ever make me hate this tits…they just always appear when I’m about to forget Lohan…..

I just know these are better than Santa Claus.

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Lindsay Lohan is great. I mean that’s how she developed her drug addiction, it all started with a broken soul and a need to self medicate to have a good time and feel good while not caring about anything else. She’d get naked, she’d get fucked up, she had a lifestyle people who don’t mind dying young dream of, partying, shopping, traveling, fucking….

Unfortunately, she’s slowed the fuck down cuz of this whole rehab bullshit.

Luckily there are still remnants of Lohan that was and who I think that will be again, like this picture of her topless for Inferno…..

Sure, I’ll take her any way she comes, I have a soft spot for her….probably as soft a spot as Sam Ronson has for her….but I’m not competing, I’m just staring at tits.

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Here is some broken down Lohan showing off her leg on her way to rehab or therapy or whatever the fuck she’s doing to better herself and make her feel like she’s on her way to being a well-rounded person because I still believe in her having comeback and even if she never pulls through and shows the world the pussy in academy award nominated films…at least she has her inner demons eating away at her that gives us hope she will show the world her pussy in in some drunken or drug fueled rage….

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