I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

16

Aug

I am – Elizabeth Hasselback’s Cameltoe For The Kids of the Day

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These pictures are old but I had no choice to post them because this is more of a public service announcement to let you know to keep your kids away from her. Think of this as the pedophile watch in your hometown that identifies and notifies you when the pedophile moves in so parents don’t hire the new neighbor to babysit, only it’s really nothing at all like that.

She churns out kids like she’s a fucking baby factory and I am convinced that she does it because she’s trying to create a master race in her image, because we all know that she’s some weird religious cunt who found god when alone in the woods in Survivor and ever since then she’s been down fucking hill into crazy land.

I will admit that I watched that season of Survivor, i thought she was hot, I liked her bandana shirt with her nipples always hard out of excitement of being on the camera. But they always edited out pretty much anything she had to say, which was a good thing for us but not so good for her and she had to find another way to spread her word. So now she’s followed what she thinks is god’s plan for her to pollute housewives every fucking day with her bullshit on the view, winning them over to her team and now she’s working her way through the kids of America. So I guess she may not be a sex offender but she is a threat.

Point of this post is to say that Elizabeth Hasselback is a fucking cult and she’s even luring me in with her cameltoe exposed to a room full of kids. I know that if that was you and you were up there reading a kids book with your dick in hand, or even with just a hard on in your DJ AM’s (that means bicycle shorts for those in the know), you’d probably get arrested. Instead this bitch gets praised be because she confuses us into thinking she’s got good intentions and that she’s a fucking hero.

SO for an old set of pictures no one will like and that everyone has seen because I was out of town, I spent a little too much time writing this. But I guess I just had to get the word out. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Some Old Jessica Simpson Camel Toe
Some Old Heidi Klum Cameltoe Pic
Some Justine Henin Cameltoe on the Courth
Some Elizabeth Berkley in a Bikini Because Her Name is Elizabeth….

Posted in:Cameltoe|Crazy|Elizabeth Hasselback|Religious|Unsorted

2007

15

Aug

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I just got a bill for the rubber vaginas a company sent me for some product test I could never do for them because my dick doesn’t work. I was thinking about lining them up and having this gay black dude who hangs out in my neighborhood work his magic on them in video and tell us what he thought the best one was, but I ended up taking them out of the box and tried fucking them all by rubbing my useless dick and saggy balls all up on it because I had hope since they didn’t didn’t smell like whatever my wife’s been cooking in her pants the last few years….

I set up a meeting with the fag to see if he could do anything with them and when I pulled them out they were covered in pubes. He didn’t believe me when I said that it must have been something on my floor. Needless to say, that video probably won’t be happening, but fedEX still managed to hit me up with 60 dollars for customs and that makes me cry on the inside.

Whenever I am sad…I just click my links. Since you’re always sad, I expect you to click my links too. Cuddles.

Mandy Moore is a Man
GO

Here’s a Game Called Pornstar or Popstar. They Are Pretty Much the Same Fucking Thing in My Mind…But The Game’s Worth Playing…
GO

First Lohan in Rehab Picture
GO

Some Chick Named Jenny Gilbertson Posing in a Bikini on Video
GO

Some Dude Reenacts Seinfeld and Plays Every Character Himself
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Heidi Montag’s Boyfriend Didn’t Even Give Her a Real Diamond Ring
GO

Hidden Camera Show Catches Guys Lookin Up Girls’ Skirts
GO

Whoose Boobs? – The Chocolate Edition Game
GO

Selma Blair on the Cover of Dazed Topless
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Paris Hilton Has It Out For Lohan in this Lost Dog Poster She Put Up. I Hate To Admit that this is kinda clever…
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Some Strange Lesbians in Panties Commercial for a Convenience Store
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Paris and Nicky Hilton ask for $500,000 to Host a NYE Party
GO

Woman Takes a Piss/Shit on the Side of the Street Video
GO

Some Idiot Tries a Ladder to Pool Trick and Fails.
GO

Katharine McPhee is Pregnant on the Set of Some Shitty Movie
GO

Some Bitch Named Emma Griffiths Posing
GO

Keira Knightley is Posing in Elle Magazine
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Kid Splatters Himself on the Wall
GO

Danielle Lloyd Taking Her Tits for a Walk
GO

Some Freak Gets Some Other Freak to Perform Some Freakish Stunt That Could Kill Her
GO

Some Hot Imports Night Video I May Not Be Into – But You Probably Are
GO

Jordan’s Black Panty Upskirt
GO

Britney Spears Hit K-Fed with a Frying Pan
GO

What the hell is the dude with the Mohawk wearing?
GO

Jenna Jameson Has Completed her Duck Surgery…Whatever that means…
GO

10 AIDS Ads from Around the World
GO

Perez Hilton is a Celebrity Rap Superstar for MTV and I Don’t Fucking Get It…Motherfucker’s Got No Business Being on TV and Should Stick to his Socially Awkward Blog….
GO

Guy Smashes His Friend with an Ironing Board
GO

Video of Some Chick Peeing
GO

They are Saying that Halle Berry is 2 Months Pregnant
GO

Dude Get Knocked the Fuck Out in Front of Chicks
GO

Some Girls Showing Their Junk at a Fast Food Restaurant
GO

Gwen Stefanis is Wet and Slutting Out for Her Perfume Line
GO

6 Days Til Hayden Panettiere Turns 18
GO

Britney Spears Hates Her Kids
GO

Kim Kardashian Has Ass Implants
GO

Karolina Kurkova and Selita Ebanks together in Pictures Making You Hot and Bothered While Reading My Site. Sick-o.
GO

Brandon Davis’ Weird Fucking Eye Disorder
GO

Some Urban Ninja’s Doing Their Urban Ninja Parcour Shit.
GO

Some Cam Girl Named Renee Doing What Cam Girls Do….
GO

Some Topless Chick Should Be The New Spokesperson for Coca Cola
GO

Japanese Porn May Be Pixelated to Block Out The Genitals – But That Shit Doesn’t Hide The Squirt
GO

I know People Who Get Laid From This and You Could be One of Them
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

15

Aug

I am – Ashley Scott Bikini Pictures of the Day

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I don’t know who Ashley Scott is, which is surprising since I’ve been doing this site for so long. I can only assume that hard drinking for so many years has made me lose anything that resembles a memory and that I am just a high-functioning retard at this point. I don’t need to be in a home but I do catch myself sitting in the park hitting 2 rocks together for hours on end while rockin’ back and forth. I like to think it’s part of my charm.

The reality is that I am too ugly for a girl like Ashley Scott to ever considering getting naked for, so I rely on these pictures of her to make me believe that my life isn’t destined to some fat middle-aged whore who made my stop working, taking every bit of masculinity I ever had away from me leaving me nothing more than a fat dude with tits. I was trying to talk dirty to this slut on IM in hopes of bringing some level of my spunk back and she was into cybersex. She wanted me to virtually rape her but I couldn’t pull through. I knew that even in fantasy a rape scene headed by me would end up with my limp dick trying it’s hardest to make it’s way into the promised land, leaving her bored of the role-playing, and leaving me on the corner of the bed limp dick in hand, head bowed in shame and embarrassment possibly with tears of frustration dripping down my face.

I guess that doesn’t really matter to you, I was just saying you should take this pictures to a private part of your mother’s house, like the bathroom, lock the door and rape yourself, because let’s face it, she’s a hell of a lot better than anything you’ll ever land.


Related Posts:

Ashley Scott’s Panties of the Day
Uma Thurman Bikini Pictures
Celine Dion Bikini Pictures
Serena Williams Bikini Pictures
Britney Spears Bikini Ass

Posted in:Ashley Scott|Ass|Bikini|Changing|Tits|Unsorted

2007

15

Aug

I am – Anna Faris in her Underwear of the Day

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Well It’s nice to see that in my weeks absence not much has changed around here. My stepfather Jesus is still a fat asshole and you are still a sexless virgin beating off to pictures on the internet and hoping Mommy doesn’t come in and bust you. Did you miss me? I missed you… The last week or so has been pretty exciting for me, and by exciting I mean drunk and blurry. I don’t remember much to be honest, and the part that I do I wish I could forget.

I went to the bar at The W last weekend, which is a change for me because the bars I usually frequent are pretty seedy with dirty bathrooms that junkies from the street use to shoot up in. I’m not really used to being surrounded by business men in $200 shirts and italian shoes and having to pay for $9 drinks, but when I realized that by simply talking to then men in the $200 shirts and and italian shoes, that would then pay for my drinks things got a little more interesting. I’m no whore, but I am a pretty fucking poor and I’m not the type of poor person that is to proud to take hand outs, in fact I’m quite the opposite.

I ended up meeting this one guy who was actually pretty hot and claimed he was some sort of music executive from Atlanta, which I don’t really believe because I told him I was 25 and worked for an advertising agency, so I’ll just assume he was lying too. The vodka was flowing like water out of the tap and soon enough I was drunk, and his hands were far enough up my dress that it was time we went up to his $500 a night room

I’d like to tell you he had a massive a cock, fucked the shit out of me and gave me multiple orgasms but he didn’t and I didn’t, so I won’t. Instead he had a soft pencil dick that barely got hard, he busted a nut in 30 seconds and when he pulled out, the condom stayed inside like it was scared to come out (I would have been too) I went to the bathroom and when I came back he was fast asleep like a 15 year old which just came for the first time.

I stole 50 from his wallet and all the travel size soap and shampoo as well, put everything from the minibar in my purse and broke the fuck out.

Here’s Anna Faris wearing a pink bra and undies set similar to the ones I was wearing the other night, except her’s don’t have the smell and residue of a bad nights sex on them.

Well actually, they probably do.

hugs and kisses
Marie-eve Martinez


Related Posts:

Katherine McPhee’s Panties of the Day
Carmen Electra in Her Panties of the Day
Brooke Hogan in Her Underwear of the Day

Posted in:Anna Faris|Ass|Bikini|Underwear|Unsorted

2007

15

Aug

I am – Anne Hathaway is Trying to Prove that she Isn’t Boring of the Day

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Yesterday I came across the pictures of Anne Hathaway and her lame boyfriend on some lame romantic getaway on some yacht that I would love to have a topless yacht party on and bitch was wearing a fucking bed sheet. Being a pervert, I couldn’t grasp what slut was doing wearing a bed sheet when spending all this money on having a good fucking time with her boyfriend. I figured if she wanted to stay covered up and frigid, she could just have stayed home alone with her cats, a good book and maybe even a couple pints of ice cream and some romantic comedies. But it turns out that I was wrong, which is usually the case or at least based on pretty much every experience of my life, it’s been the case and bitch is here showing us all how sexy and wild she can get.

Speaking of being wrong, I remember hanging out with the guys at the park a while ago and one of them was telling us all a story about how his friend used to jerk off with his other friend when they were in college. He said that they made a nightly event of it like playing a fucking Magic card tournament or whatever the fuck dudes who jerk off together in college do. They would throw on a porn and go at it to see who came the fastest, hardest and the most. I was pretty surprised by the story and thought it was as closet case faggot as you can get, but one of the other dudes who was with me said it wasn’t a big deal and that when he was in high school his dentist used to jerk him off and that he wasn’t gay. I don’t really know where I am going with this, but it turned out the dudes I thought were gay turned out that they weren’t and that was an example of being wrong.

I guess Anne Hathaway reminded me of this story because I think you’re probably jerking off with your buddy right now and here are the pictures of her licking dudes nipple, the picture of her lookin like she’s giving him a blowjob and pictures of her drinking, jet skiing and slutting it out. She may be doing it for the camera but who really gives a fuck because she’s in a bikini and I am pretty easy going when it comes to bitches in bikinis and I try not to look that far past trying to make out her vagina definition that the bikini’s making. I was under the impression that bitch had way bigger tits, but maybe it’s just the fact that she’s wearing her grandmother’s bikini from the 50s that’s keeping her junk in lockdown.


Related Posts:

Anne Hathaway Boring Romantic Getaway
Rebecca Gayheart Topless on a Yacht
Abigail Clancy Topless on a Yacht

Posted in:Anne Hathaway|Ass|Bikini|Slut|Tits|Unsorted|Wet|Yacht

2007

15

Aug

I am – Anne Hathaway is Trying to Prove that she Isn't Boring of the Day

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Yesterday I came across the pictures of Anne Hathaway and her lame boyfriend on some lame romantic getaway on some yacht that I would love to have a topless yacht party on and bitch was wearing a fucking bed sheet. Being a pervert, I couldn’t grasp what slut was doing wearing a bed sheet when spending all this money on having a good fucking time with her boyfriend. I figured if she wanted to stay covered up and frigid, she could just have stayed home alone with her cats, a good book and maybe even a couple pints of ice cream and some romantic comedies. But it turns out that I was wrong, which is usually the case or at least based on pretty much every experience of my life, it’s been the case and bitch is here showing us all how sexy and wild she can get.

Speaking of being wrong, I remember hanging out with the guys at the park a while ago and one of them was telling us all a story about how his friend used to jerk off with his other friend when they were in college. He said that they made a nightly event of it like playing a fucking Magic card tournament or whatever the fuck dudes who jerk off together in college do. They would throw on a porn and go at it to see who came the fastest, hardest and the most. I was pretty surprised by the story and thought it was as closet case faggot as you can get, but one of the other dudes who was with me said it wasn’t a big deal and that when he was in high school his dentist used to jerk him off and that he wasn’t gay. I don’t really know where I am going with this, but it turned out the dudes I thought were gay turned out that they weren’t and that was an example of being wrong.

I guess Anne Hathaway reminded me of this story because I think you’re probably jerking off with your buddy right now and here are the pictures of her licking dudes nipple, the picture of her lookin like she’s giving him a blowjob and pictures of her drinking, jet skiing and slutting it out. She may be doing it for the camera but who really gives a fuck because she’s in a bikini and I am pretty easy going when it comes to bitches in bikinis and I try not to look that far past trying to make out her vagina definition that the bikini’s making. I was under the impression that bitch had way bigger tits, but maybe it’s just the fact that she’s wearing her grandmother’s bikini from the 50s that’s keeping her junk in lockdown.


Related Posts:

Anne Hathaway Boring Romantic Getaway
Rebecca Gayheart Topless on a Yacht
Abigail Clancy Topless on a Yacht

Posted in:Anne Hathaway|Ass|Bikini|Slut|Tits|Unsorted|Wet|Yacht

2007

14

Aug

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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It turns out that I slept on a lot of bikini picture sets today and that’s too bad. There was Jenna Jameson and I had them all lined up with a post in mind about AIDS and Porn and then there was Pam Anderson and I am sure there were others. I guess I am just slowly getting back intot he groove. The good thing is that I have the stepLINKS to pick up my slack, so here are a bunch of links I thought were worth checking out and being no authority on what’s good, you can click them at your own risk. Cuddles.

Jenna Jameson Looking Like HIV Bikini Pictures
GO

Nicole Richie’s Boob’s Keep Getting Bigger Cuz She’s Pregnant
GO

FHM Australia Hottie Isabel Lucas is Worth Lookin’ At before She Realizes She’s Too Good For You…
GO

Fatty or Farm Animal?
GO

Diane Kruger See Through Bikini Top
GO

Some Blind Girl Playing Helen Keller Falls Off Stage
GO

Greek Police Beat Up Some Kid Held in Custody
GO

Obama Girls Vs the Giuliani GIrls Video Dance Off…
GO

Some Chick Named Jelena For You….
GO

The Worst Celebrity Tans
GO

Sophie Marceau in a Bathing Suit on a Yacht Because Summer is Still Here…
GO

Britney Spears’ Panty-Clad Ass
GO

Some Evan Rachel Wood Photoshoot You’ll Jerk Off To In Blood Like You Were Marilyn Manson
GO

Some Pam Anderson Bikini Pictures
GO

Some Dude Named Zion I Performing at USC
GO

Some Indian Actress Named Bipasha Basu in Some Revealing Dress
GO

The Worst Band Ever Caught on Film
GO

Amy Winehouse is in Rehab with her Boyfriend/Husband/Pete Doherty Impersonator
GO

Some Mandy Moore on the Golf Course
GO

Rope Pulling / Tug of War the Japanese Way…
GO

Do you know what your daughter is up to?
GO

Mary Kate Olsen Makes Out With Ben Kingsley
GO

Jessica Alba’s Hard Nipples on the Set of Some New Movie
GO

The 50 Hottest Women in Music
GO

Bear Grylls is Hungry and Eating Live Watersnakes…
GO

Janice Dickinson and Her Tits Humiliate Some Poor Dude
GO

This is What Swimming in Tokyo is Like…
GO

Hilary Clinton’s New Political Commercial….If I was American I Would Vote For Her Because she has Tits…
GO

Some Miss Universe Naked and Posing…
GO

News Reporter Laughs While Reporting a Fatal Accident…
GO

How To Make a Laser that Burns Stuff…
GO

Youtube has Made Cable Access Shows Obsolete. Any Fag With Bad Jokes Can Become Pat O’Dbrien….
GO

Megan Fox and Gillian Anderson’s Tits are Friends
GO

Krusher Sent in this Looking Good Sweetheart Set – Scroll Down….
GO

Former Pornstar Tries to Become a Video “model” while her Brother tries to become an emcee in this online movie….
GO

Lohan’s getting Sued For Assault…
GO

Some Beyonce in Lingerie Video Called Deja Vu that You’ve Probably Seen
GO

Clay Aiken is a Drag Queen and Performs Like One As Singing Justin Timberlake…
GO

Some Chick Naked in Nature…
GO

Some American Idol Contestant Goes into Labor When Singing for the Judges
GO

Some Chick Named Maggie Grace at some Premiere
GO

Meet Mr No Legs….
GO

Some Chick Flashing Cars Above the Highway…
GO

Some Chick Named Slinta Stone in Picture
GO

Some Drunk Chick in the Bar Acting Up….By Writing Her Name With Her Pussy….
GO

Pornstar Savanna Samson Explains it All To Us…
GO

Some Stupid Song Called What ABout Blowjobs…
GO

Some Naked Amateurs for You…
GO

This Shit Worked on my Stepdaughter and She’s Got a Vagina – So It’s Worth Trying…
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

14

Aug

I am – Anne Hathaway’s Boobs and Boyfriend of the Day

When I was 5 I was best friends with my rich cousin Peter, who lived in a nice house because his Dad spent the day at work instead of sucking down scotch in the garage. I consider Peter rich because he had an illegal cleaning every day who brought along her 4 year-old kid, Julio. I invented a game that involved a girlfriend, boyfriend, and a dude washing the car. Since Julio was Mexican, he got to be my boyfriend.

So I filled my shirt with socks for boobs, told Peter to start washing the invisible car, sat Julio down in the driver’s seat and put my head in Julio’s lap (just like Mom and Dad), and that’s when the housekeeper appeared and started screaming some shit in Spanish. I don’t know what her deal was. Bitch snatched up Julio, so Peter and I just moved our party to his playroom. I picked up this fancy Fisher-Price singing-machine. There was brown liquid all over the back. It had to be chocolate because Peter was rich and rich people have chocolate. I licked it. It wasn’t chocolate.

Let me put it in terms you can understand: battery acid in your mouth is like poison ivy plus Eastern-European Super-Whore-Herpes all over your dick. After my aunt called a doctor, she had a pow-wow with that bitch housekeeper. The cunt sent me home that day, and every day after that, but I kept coming back. Because that’s what future hookers are like as kids: strays who will eat anything that looks like food, teach porno games to your kids, and molest the help.

I don’t know what Julio is doing these days, but I do know what Anne Hathaway is up to. She is living in a magical land of pretty fireworks and fancy clothes. Here she is on a boring date with her euro-trash boyfriend who is being sued for allegedly spending money from the charity he owns (and she is on the board of) on her and their ritzy Manhattan lifestyle, instead of on starving kids in Venezuela. Go ahead, throw your head back and laugh at the hungry poor people, eat some South American babies for supper, and then make out with your queef-faced swindler, cuz he’s the most exciting thing about you. She does have nice boobs though, i guess, i saw them in “Havoc.” Julio probably grew up to be like the gangbangers in “Havoc.”

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

Bonus – Anne Hathaway is Totally Unsexy on Her Romantic Getaway with her Jewish Boyfriend as She Kisses Him in Some Bed Sheet Dress….If I Was There, Bitch Would have to be Topless if She Wanted to Board My Ship…


Related Posts:

Anne Hathaway Boring Cleavage of the Day
Brokeback Mountain is not Gay

Posted in:Anne Hathaway|Making Out|Tits|Unsorted

2007

14

Aug

I am – Anne Hathaway's Boobs and Boyfriend of the Day

When I was 5 I was best friends with my rich cousin Peter, who lived in a nice house because his Dad spent the day at work instead of sucking down scotch in the garage. I consider Peter rich because he had an illegal cleaning every day who brought along her 4 year-old kid, Julio. I invented a game that involved a girlfriend, boyfriend, and a dude washing the car. Since Julio was Mexican, he got to be my boyfriend.

So I filled my shirt with socks for boobs, told Peter to start washing the invisible car, sat Julio down in the driver’s seat and put my head in Julio’s lap (just like Mom and Dad), and that’s when the housekeeper appeared and started screaming some shit in Spanish. I don’t know what her deal was. Bitch snatched up Julio, so Peter and I just moved our party to his playroom. I picked up this fancy Fisher-Price singing-machine. There was brown liquid all over the back. It had to be chocolate because Peter was rich and rich people have chocolate. I licked it. It wasn’t chocolate.

Let me put it in terms you can understand: battery acid in your mouth is like poison ivy plus Eastern-European Super-Whore-Herpes all over your dick. After my aunt called a doctor, she had a pow-wow with that bitch housekeeper. The cunt sent me home that day, and every day after that, but I kept coming back. Because that’s what future hookers are like as kids: strays who will eat anything that looks like food, teach porno games to your kids, and molest the help.

I don’t know what Julio is doing these days, but I do know what Anne Hathaway is up to. She is living in a magical land of pretty fireworks and fancy clothes. Here she is on a boring date with her euro-trash boyfriend who is being sued for allegedly spending money from the charity he owns (and she is on the board of) on her and their ritzy Manhattan lifestyle, instead of on starving kids in Venezuela. Go ahead, throw your head back and laugh at the hungry poor people, eat some South American babies for supper, and then make out with your queef-faced swindler, cuz he’s the most exciting thing about you. She does have nice boobs though, i guess, i saw them in “Havoc.” Julio probably grew up to be like the gangbangers in “Havoc.”

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

Bonus – Anne Hathaway is Totally Unsexy on Her Romantic Getaway with her Jewish Boyfriend as She Kisses Him in Some Bed Sheet Dress….If I Was There, Bitch Would have to be Topless if She Wanted to Board My Ship…


Related Posts:

Anne Hathaway Boring Cleavage of the Day
Brokeback Mountain is not Gay

Posted in:Anne Hathaway|Making Out|Tits|Unsorted

2007

14

Aug

I am – Homeless Cooking Show of the Day

When I was in Asia I did something I should have never done and that was eat the street food. Everyone told me not to touch the shit they were making on the backs of their bikes because they had no fridges, there was no way of telling how old the food was and I guess I could have landed anything from Feline AIDS to SARS to Avian Flu to whatever else the Chinese are spreading….

I read somewhere that the oil they use to cook with was found in floating on the water in the sewers and that worrying about them coughing on the shit was the least of my fucking concerns. But since I am broke and since I have eaten out of dumpsters, I have eaten rat and other things I’ve randomly come across for survival, I figured it was safe.

After spending 3 days locked down on a toilet thinking that I shat out my heart and even had to look to see if any other organs squirted out with it, I realized that the warnings were probably worth listening too but that doesn’t mean the shit didn’t taste good.

Here’s a video of some homeless lady who probably is the best damn homeless chef out there. She probably brought her kitchen skills from the abusive home she ran away from with her and I am just helping her reach her dreams of teaching the world her craft with this is street cookin’ show.

Posted in:stepTV|Unsorted