Jewel Kilcher Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2021

17

Aug

Jewel in a Bra of the Day

You can save my soul….

In ridiculous youtube vortex stories, a few weeks ago I got into watching old late night TV shows to compare and contrast what’s going on today…

I don’t watch the nightly talk shows, but I know I’ve been a critic of Jimmy Fallon since the day he started because he was doing the show for viral clips, and those viral clips was schoolyard games that you’d have in elementary school activity day, which is about the level of intelligence the average viewer and really the average american has…it’s the reason the politicians talk to us like we are children…

So Fallon always sucked, then I’ve seen Colbert weirdness over the years where he’s siding with the people who cut him the multi-million dollar a week check he gets….then there’s Kimmel who I saw make fun of Mike Lindell to his face to make him look like a fool to his audience, despite Mike Lindell being the Vince from Slabchop we all need, he went so far as to have a Mike Lindell impersonator stand behind the real Mike Lindell to do a retard parody of Lindell…and I thought to myself “these people must be smarter and more talented than this, what fucking sell outs”….

2 minutes ago I googled “Tight pants” to see what the top tight pants story was…since I write Tight Pants Tuesday weekly for the last 47 weeks….and this is what I found….shocking….manipulation…brainwashing…

So I wanted old Late Night to see if America was always treated like idiots, I would watch Charlie Rose and Conan and Letterman…and Craig Kilbourn before there was internet….

Anyway, one of the old clips, which you can google or youtbe was Jewell pushing her dance album to Craig Kilbourn with her tits out…and I thought…Damn…Jewell is a good fucking pop bitch who sold her soul to the industry with her tits…the way people used to launch careers…through fucking…and she was pretty fucking hot….

From Alaskan singer songwriter, living in her car for an afternoon in LA before finding some rich dude to fuck into fame….

Well, she’s still around…and she’s still got tits, and I regret not jerking off to her more back in the day, because her archive is worth jerking off to..

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jewel|Jewel Kilcher

2019

14

Aug

Jewel Fitness Erotica of the Day

No Comments »

Jewel

Jewel may be 50 fucking years old and a bad memory of 1994 when she first hit the scene with music that I guess was relevant at the time….

She’s debatably always been a slut, so this video of her doing weird titty fitness is bringing out her “I live in a car and I’ll do anything for a warm shower” attitude.

Because her story in the 90s was that she was an Alaskan singer/song writer who lived in her car while playing coffee houses in exchange for food along the west coast, only to b discovered by someone who was willing to give her a warm shower and market thee fuck out of her creating a money making machine….

All thanks to being the hot enough chick living in a car for some pervert in LA to scoop up and turn into a “singer songwriter” of the time..

Now, all these years later, Jewel is making fetish videos like it was still 1992 and she was saving my soul…or trying to find someone to save hers by using her for money….getting her rich in the process so it’s all worked out for everyone, even you, cuz you get to jerk off to old lady Jewel doing whatever this is, right now, and it’s offensive cuz she labels her friend “GAY BESTIE”….when we’re not allowed to call people by their sexuality. It’s a hate crime.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jewel|Jewel Kilcher|SFW

2018

23

Aug

Jewel’s Got Them Titties on of the Day

No Comments »

You can save your soul…by not listening to Jewel’s music….but it can be a great reminder of 1995, when you were just a loser in High School, jerking off to her tits….like some record exec who gave her a storyline that she lived in her car before becoming a huge success as a coffee shop poet…which I guess was a thing in the 90s…when Starbucks was starting up….and West Coast people along the cost were into singer songwriter shit…

When she happened, I was a 26 year old failure working in a factory that played the top 40 radio and this song would hammer into my head so many times…that made me hate her…until I saw the video and realized she had tits…

Tits that were a good way to my soul…that may not have saved my soul but that saved my opinion of her….and gave me an understanding how a homeless 18 year old sleeping in her guitar case in her car turned professional…the tits…man…it was always the tits…

I mean any exec at any level would pull this from a parking lot and save her soul….so here she is now at 45, looking alright as she shows off her mom tits….

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jewel|Jewel Kilcher|SFW

2018

27

Mar

Jewel Bikini for Instagram of the Day

No Comments »

You can save your soul…by not listening to Jewel’s music….but it can be a great reminder of 1995, when you were just a loser in High School, or possibly not born yet, I don’t know who the fuck any of you are, or if you actually exist, I just know I was a 26 year old failure working in a factory that played the top 40 radio and this song would hammer into my head so many times…that made me hate her…until I saw the video and realized she was busty…and that her story of living in a van before turning to coffee shops on her quest to fame was likely bullshit and more interestingly involved sucking some dick to get on the top 40 radio….I don’t know who saved Jewel’s soul, but someone signed her and made her rich….and he probably got his dick sucked…it was a more competitive time then…where the best DICK suck won the hit song…

That said, she’s in a bikini at 43, looking alright as she shows off her mom tits….

I was amazed to google and see she’s only 43…it means her song in 1995 came out when she was 20….that’s not nearly old enough to be as tormented as she pretended to be…what a phony…with real tits.

Posted in:Jewel|Jewel Kilcher|SFW|Videos

2016

29

Aug

Jewel Kilcher’s Use of Cleavage of the Day

No Comments »

Jewel Kilcher lived in her car…that was how they packaged her singer song writing career…randomly found at coffee houses in Alaska and the Pacific north, singing her songs of broken hearts before a journey to hollywood created a down to earth..artist…who is probably a tyrant, living in her mansion, or multiple mansions, all shallow and vapid like you’d expect a celeb to be, but one area on her “woman in song” life that is full, not empty..is the tits…

If the story of the living in a van in Hollywood for more than one night, or the drive down to Hollywood is true…which I doubt…she was probably servicing studio execs into giving her hotel rooms and record deals with these same tits…but it makes a less interesting story for an acoustic guitar player…in flannel, ripped jeans and no shoes…(all girls in entertainment are hookers, even the hippies, who don’t have armpit hair since they are actually – not hippies…but hollywood rich skanks…)

She can’t save my soul, but her angelic voice / cleavage in a small top could…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jewel Kilcher|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Jewel Kilcher in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

I once made an experiemental video set to a Jewel Song..

It was starring a couple of potatoes doing some stop motion weirdness, because I guess before the internet I was onto the whole “do weird things and call it art because idiots will buy anything if marketed properly”….a knowledge I’ve had forever, but don’t do anything about, because marketing is a lot of work and I prefer drinking, I would require some kind of manager but that would require talking to someone….which I hate doing…I’d rather just sit her knowing it’s easy to troll the world than troll the world…

I guess I was a visionary, because back then Jewel just happened, and now she’s turned into a potato…a bikini wearing potato…

Hey Miss Cleo..I’m the fucking psychic network..if I had a VHS player I’d have the proof…

I guess the most exciting thing about Jewel is her livijng in her car lie…she probably slept in her car once, before sleeping on anyone who would listen to her Alaskan folk music…that has now brought her to this…bikini wearing potato…20 years later..

Posted in:Jewel Kilcher|SFW