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Archive for the Latoya Jackson Category

2010

17

Sep

The Best Party I Wasn’t Invited To of the Day

2 Comments »

I don’t get invited to parties, I never really did, I was the guy no one wanted around, but I’m cool with that…I guess it is expected when you are the weird guy who doesn’t shower you catch in dirty laundry hamper playing with your mom’s dirty panties….I am sure you know what I mean….

So this Macy’s Glamorama bullshit went down and they attracted a whole lot of weirdness, I wasn’t included in the fun, but I figured I’d document what we all missed…

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They biggest guest was Michael Jackson in his female costume, cuz we all know dude’s not dead, he’s just decided to be Latoya Jackson and he’s loving all the new found love.

Aubrey O’Day was there with her fake tits and thick body she designed to seduce black men, and by designed I mean overate thinkin’ she’d corner a market, that turned out to not be a good strategy, despite having had the opportunity to hang with MJ in his Lady costume…

They also had the redheaded bitch from the Andy Dick and Negro who isn’t Whoppi on The View show, who lost 50 lbs with Jenny Craig but still has a stupidly large head….that makes her look like she didn’t lose any weight on the Jenny Craig commercial…totally defeating the whole point of losing the weight…and scaring us by making us think this weightloss has made her more sexual…cuz we know it has…it always does…but the good news is that she’s still a fat pig to me…

The show stopper was that they managed to steal this human/giraffe hybrid from the lab to make an appearance…what the fuck is this thing….

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Latoya Jackson

2010

19

Jan

Latoya Jackson is the Queen of the World of the Day

1 Comment »

I have a feeling LaToya Jackson is happy her brother is “dead” or staged his death because all of a sudden she’s become relevant again, not that she was ever really relevant to begin with, unless you consider a stint with Playboy relevant, which you probably do because once a chick gets naked for you, or in pictures you pretend are for you, because it makes cumming easier, it gives her purpose, but I meant in terms of her own self-purpose, see now she’s on talk shows getting interviewed, she’s trying to get on American Idol as a judge, and here she is taking the stage at events and people are actually listening to her and applauding her and she’s probably feeling like she’s at the top of the fucking world and all it took was her brother’s death….something I bet she wished happened many years earlier…when she thinks of all the good times she’s missed out on when she was still worth fucking, before her body started to slowly die when he was still alive…

Pics via Fame


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Posted in:Latoya Jackson|Queen|RIP MJ

2009

18

Dec

Latoya Jackson Buying Lingerie for the Weirdos of the Day

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Latoya Jackson went Lingerie shopping and despite having spent some time a decade and a half ago watching her playboy videos, I never really thought she had it goin on and that was before she took off her human mask and let her Alien features shine, like she was her brother, I found the whole thing pretty unsettling….

Not to mention she was quoted saying that she was lingerie shopping because….

La Toya Jackson says she’s picking up gifts “for the children” from Frederick’s of Hollywood – a famous lingerie store!

Think of this as my Michael Jackson tribute, since the only living thing that looks enough like him to imagine him molesting you when you were a little boy and had dreams of having an amusment park and petting zoo and all the toy you ever wanted all to yourself, back in a time when you didn’t know playing “hide the microphone in your ass and don’t tell your mother because we’re friends and this is “our” secret” was wrong, but you did know it makes all your dreams come true…..

Here are the disturbing pictures….and I think her hat is from “the palace hotel” in Dubai, the same hotel I think her brother is living at dressed like an arab woman convered head to toe and ninja so no one notices him, but that’s all speculation…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Latoya Jackson|Lingerie

2009

11

Nov

LaToya Jackson’s Hot Body of the Day

3 Comments »

I figure that it was never quite gay to jerk off to Michael Jackson, not because I spend a good year doing it, but because his voice was angelic, his talent possibly sent from god, his sexuality and gender pretty ambigious and really more on the no penis in his pants side of things. It was on the same level as a dude jerking off to an Anime movie, or a comic book character, he was just bigger than life, almost non-human sent from another planet to seduce us and manipulate us thru song but I do think it is weird to jerk off to him now that he’s pretending to be dead, and living as a muslim woman in the desert somewhere to escape his demons here…..that’s where LaToya the stand in pussy comes in. She’s like some kind of MJ fluff girl, picking up the slack from him now that he’s dropped the balls he never really had and manned up and escaped the hell he is living and her body is pretty fucking tight lookin…not to mention one I have jerked off to decades ago when she worked for Playboy…good times…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Body|Hot|Latoya Jackson

2009

05

Oct

Latoya Jackson in Rome of the Day

6 Comments »

I wonder if part of Latoya Jackson is happy that Michael is dead, yes, I mean actual part of her and not one created by science, because all of a sudden people care what shit thinks, what she’s doing, where she’s traveling, when the last decade, no one even noticed her in line at the grocery store and if they did, they’d step as far away as possible out of fear of catching watchever disease got her and melted her face off. Seriously, this bitch has got to be the missing link, the closest creature knows to man linking us to apes, and don’t call me out for being a racist, all I’m getting at is that bitch isn’t human and that I hate all this love she’s getting, it’s getting to her head and making my fantasies of fucking her while dressed like a fat Mexican Michael Jackson impersonator in Tijuana or some shit, it’s a bit of a fetish I’ve had lined up for some time, that will never happen thanks to MJ. That fucker didn’t just ruin the lives of the kids he molested, I’ll tell you that much….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Latoya Jackson

2009

01

Oct

Latoya Jackson’s Big Fake Alien TIts of the Day

5 Comments »

I have a confession to make. I had a Latoya Jackson VHS tape given to me years ago that was produced by Playboy, that pretty much featured her in 3 or 4 different scenes where she danced around naked. I don’t remember if their was any softcore lesbianism, but there was definitely trimmed muff, and I definitely masturbated to it because it was the 90s and my options were limited. Sure she looks like she isn’t human, but so do most of the girls I’ve banged, you know with their retarded faces and if anything her Jackson pussy is far more luxurious than the gutter I’ve visited, so here are her big fake tits in honor of our short lived one-side love affair and to help the Michael Jackson fetishists who get off to all thing MJ.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Alien|Latoya Jackson|Tits

2009

29

Sep

Latoya Jackson is Some Kind of Monster I Wanna Bang of the Day

4 Comments »

There comes a point in every chronic masturbater’s life where porn just doesn’t work anymore. That’s when people turn to freakish shit, whether it is joining the boy scouts as a team leader to see little boys naked, or sitting on public transit all day waiting for the school girls to get out of class to expose themselves to them. Some guys go gay or bi to open up the possibilities in the bedroom, since their luck with girls never really counted as luck and was more disaster and figured dudes with AIDS would be less picky. Some guys explore trannies, while others do fat chicks and there’s really no science behind it. Just last week I was talking to a girl who masturbates to anime and another dude sent me a link to his sex doll shaped like an anime, and here is Latoya Jackson who hardly looks like an alien or cartoon, but I know at least one person out there would still fuck or at least jerk off to her fake tits.

On a side note, I have this theory that Michael Jackson was an alien, he did have a weird obsession with space and moons and moonwalking and he did end up lookin like some kind of monster who’s human disguise withered away so I guess it is only natural for his sister to age the same way. I also have a theory that Michael Jackson in collaboration with the middle east staged his own death to distract the public from the Iranian election, while solving his own problems like a tour he didn’t want to do, debt he couldn’t pay and selling more albums and movie tickets from generating a whole new level of interest in him, but who cares about what I think…just think about cumming on this Latoya face.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Alien|Latoya Jackson|Monster

2009

06

Aug

Latoya Jackson’s Hot Date with Ed Hardy of the Day

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Since jerking off to fresh Michael Jackson material isn’t possible cuz he’s dead, I’m forced to go to his stand-in, his stunt-double, his soulmate in surgery and possibly even the real Michael Jackson for all we know who lived out his dream of being a Playboy playmate 15 years ago. It would have probably been less gay if I turned to her and her vagina first, but that’s totally assuming Michael Jackson had a penis.

Speaking of genitals, she’s out with Christian Audigier. For those of you who don’t know, he’s the cunt who created Ed Hardy, Von Dutch, and night clubs in Vegas.

I wonder what money making scheme he’s got up his sleeve to explain this casual encounter, because I doubt he’s trying to get up in her vagina, mainly because she got that shit sewn the fuck up years ago cuz they needed extra skin to re-build her nose, but I am assuming it’s got something to do with producing the most expensive T-Shirt assholes everywhere will actually buy, but I guess he’s already done that hustle….

Now masturbate to the idea of these two fucking cuz you hate yourself….

Posted in:Christian Audigier|Latoya Jackson

2009

21

Jul

Latoya Jackson’s Hot Tits of the Day

1 Comment »

I like to keep my Michael Jackson masturbation material as up to date as possibe abd since he’s gone off and “Died” on me, I’m forced to use the second best thing to his hot skinny little corpse of a body and cartoon like face and that’s where Latoya Jackson comes in because she is that she is what Michael would look like had he gone through with the sex change operation, you know instead of dying and the whole thing was my dirty little secret until today, I just can’t contain myself.

Posted in:Latoya Jackson|Michael Jackson

2009

22

Jan

Latoya Jackson’s Lookin’ Pretty Fucking Good of the Day

2 Comments »

I know what you’re thinking, and that is that this Jackson sister looks like a fucking monster, something you’d expect to see in a horror movie coming to eat your brains. I guess it’s got something to do with her having had a couple of plastic surgeries and those plastic surgeries slowly falling apart like an old car that was once luxurious, but I’d still stuff her like a turkey, provided she’s still got a vagina, but that’s just because I have a thing for girls who look like they are a fucking corpse.

Posted in:Latoya Jackson|Scary