Lucy Lawless Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Lucy Lawless Category

2011

Feb

Lucy Lawless in Spartacus of the Day

I was never into Xena Warrior Princess…Not even when it was on the only channel I could pick up with my TV on a Sunday when hungover with an erection ready to be serviced before I had the internet…maybe it was cuz I wasn’t a virgin, maybe it’s cuz I hate that fantasy warrior shit, maybe it was the shitty production quality that brought me to jerking off to my neighbor’s dirty laundry, maybe it is all Xena’s fault I am the pervert I am….but I know a lot of people were into it…because you have trouble getting laid, and really who needs girls, they just get in the way of your Role Playing War Games…You fucking weirdo….

Turns out that I am into her getting naked on TV in this Spartacus shit…even though she’s huge and I like my bitches dainty, and even when the show is pretty much Xena 2.0…cuz thanks to the internet…there’s tits…and I don’t have to watch the whole thing..and that WORKS FOR ME…

Here she is with some bitch named Jamie Murray in some Lesbean shit…

Here’s some bitch named Marisa Ramirez with a great ass getting interracial…

ANd here’s some uncredited actress flashing tit and bush in an orgy…cuz we all gotta start somewhere!

Posted in:Lucy Lawless

2010

Feb

Lucy Lawless Sex Scene in Spartacus of the Day

14 Comments »

Rememeber Lucy Lawless….of course you do…I don’t know why I bothered asking that, when I know as you make your weapons for simulated battles in the park, you know the catapult, and the fucking lance and other Braveheart shit that prevents you from seriosuly getting laid, you always fall back on Lucy Lawless to guide, to show you the way and to make you feel loved when you are in the process of making love to yourself. As a virgin loser, you are loyal to your fantasies, as much as you are loyal to you videogames, you comic books and your fake god that guides you into battle every Sunday afternoon….so you’ll like this, if not for seeing tits but for the idea that in the era of Spartacus you had slaves service you before fucking, reminding us how conservative and shitty we’ve become…

Via – Whoever made the show Spartacus and TotallyCrap for posting it.

Posted in:Lucy Lawless|Sex Scene

2009

Feb

Lucy Lawless and Her Lesbian Stage Show of the Day

3 Comments »

I saw these pictures of Xena Warrior Princess in some stage show I don’t understand and figured I’d hit youtube to find more information and all I came up with was a clip from the show where she’s making out with some other girl and this caption.

In this clip, Lucy plays ‘Sappho’, a sexually precocious Catholic schoolgirl who finally kisses the object of desire, Gloria the dancer. Afterwards she sings the song, ‘The Reason’ by Hoobastank but not many people were listening for at least a minute because we were so excited and enthralled over that hot and shocking KISS. Wowie!!!!!!!!!!

Now I know that despite never watching the TV show because big women kicking ass in stupid costumes with stupid storylines and low budget effects with obnoxious arab suicide bombing screeching doesn’t do it for me, I find it kinda homoerotic, but a lot of losers became addicted to this cunt, so this video of her dyking out and trying to be sexy will be a nice change of pace from the re-runs, DVDs, posters and screencaps you’ve been jerking off to all these years, so despite being a couple days old and too weird for me, it’s a hell of a lot fresher than that mangled printout you’ve been hiding under your mattress the last decade.

Here’s a whole lot of pictures from her weird attempt at revamping a pretty shitty career…

Next time I expect to see some pussy lip…none of this fake nude bullshit. Embrace the fact you’re trying to cling on and give us what we deserve…which is real nude bullshit. Thanks.

Posted in:Kiss|Lesbian|Lucy Lawless

2007

Oct

I am – Lucy Lawless Dressed Like a Dude of the Day

1 Comment »

I decided to post these because I always thought bitch was a dyke and I know you used to get off to her broad shoulders, so it’s always funny when the girl you used to jerk off to while watching her on the warrior princess show and reading your comics has decided to go through with the sex change because she was born a man on the inside, like Jamie Lee Curtis. Wearing a man’s shirt and tie is just phase one of letting the world know that it’s coming.

Speaking of cumming, I used to date a hermaphrodite or at least a girl who jokingly told me she was a hermaphrodite over and over again, until I started believing she was opening up to me, and tried to play it off as a joke to gauge my reaction. She had all her lady parts in place and looked like a thin, relatively sexy girl with big natural tits and an ass you could bounce your dick off, but it turned out that ass you could bounce your dick off was packing a dick. Because when she was a baby they found testicles and a prostate in her ass. I never asked if they were removed, I just kept trying to forget that she ever told me shit and tried to believe it was a joke because every time I’d freak out about it, she’d convince me it was a lie, but still every time i’d fuck her normal, functioning vagina, I’d get uncomfortable, but not uncomfortable enough to not bust all over her. Maybe she wasn’t really a hermaphrodite and she was too hot to not fuck and maybe she was just a girl who was fucking with my head 6 months into me slamming her, but in my mind I banged a hermaphrodite and that makes me as weird as you. Cuddles.

Either way, I only like lipstick lesbians and hot chicks experimenting with lesbianism. Bull dykes are just too damaged from being raped or molested or from being fat and ugly that they’ve denounced men and our superficiality. I’d rather put the bull dykes in their flannel and leather and denim and construction boots and strap-on’s with their lesbian haircuts on their motorcycles so that they can ride into the sunset, as fucking far away from me as possible.

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