Lady in fucking red…holy shit….turns out that I am down with any alcohol company who doesn’t advertise on this site because they are snobs and too busy spending 100s of thousands of dollars on Penelope Cruz, the Oscar winning Spanish actress you may or may not have heard of, but have probably seen her fucking nose, at some point or another….because that’s the signature feature that she’s helped big nosed women come to terms with over the years….as the media told us she was beautiful…

I know this cuz I used to fuck a girl with a big fucking nose…I’m talking offensively big…and she was convinced she looked like Penelope Cruz….when really…she looked like a girl with a big fucking nose…but that didn’t stop her from getting with the likes of me…when really she should have been with far less attractive men…but Penelope Cruz got her through it…like she is getting through me…with this hot…red…glamour shoot for Campari….

I want to dirty up this high quality, high production loveliness with my genitals….and she is not even naked or not a 40 year old mom….

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Penelope Cruz really fucked us on this PETA campaign…she’s supposed to get naked for fur, not give fur the cold shoulder…what a fucking rip off…but the good news is that she’s recently had a kid and isn’t the big bird nosed Penelope Cruz she once was….making these non nude pics of her not getting naked for fur a nice gesture on PETA’s part…but then again, I’m into seeing all bitches naked…and not strategic naked that’s like they aren’t even naked….I’m talking fully spread eagled and ready for entry….

Here s a compilation of her nude scenes that brought her from Spain to America to make up for PETA’s Fail….

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Here are some pictures of Penelope Cruz in a dress post pregnancy.

I always thought she was kind of erotic except for her nose..you know all European accent and hot body and shit…but now you can add mom pussy and baby weight to those strikes against her….however she kinda redeemed herself when getting married in July, just 6 months prior to her birth, in what most haven’t called out as a shotgun wedding, cuz they were all distracted by wondering why the fuck they cared that two Spanish actors who made it in Hollywood were getting married…and I fucking love shotgun weddings….they remind me of white trash teen pregnancy from the deep south in the 60s, a fetish of mine, but more importantly they remind me there was a 3 month windo where they contemplated getting an aboriton…

Either way, these pics would be much better with more LABIA….God knows that since he birth she’s got some to spare…

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Pirated tits is way better than pirated music, movies, and software. I never found Penelope Cruz to be anything special, maybe it is cuz her nose could double as back-up sail on the Pirate Ship after getting shot by a cannon, or maybe its cuz I’m racist against Spanish people….or maybe I just like my bitches to be closer to 18 than 45…who really knows, but here is her cleavage anyway, even though we’re more into booty…..(embarrassingly bad joke if I was the kind of motherfucker who got embarrassed, while I’m just the motherfucker trying to get pictures of celebs I don’t give a fuck about up)

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When I saw these pictures of Penelope Cruz on her knees after paying Hollywood to validate herself as a key player, you know cuz her Oscar and millions of dollar per role wasn’t enough for her vain, self absorbed ass, by buying herself a fucking star on the walk of fame….and I figure this means so much to her because like a book ending, her on her knees is how she started her shit….at least that’s usually the case…FOLLOW ME

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Pregnancy generally disgusts me. You know the idea of a woman’s body being destroyed for the sake of letting some creature grow inside them to carry on their genetics in some vain weird way. You know the worst STD around….

But there are perks…at least when the kid isn’t yours….the main one being that pregnant bitches can’t get knocked up by you when you’re fucking them cuz they are horny and their husbands don’t want to touch them for fear of hurting the baby….but also the new milk filled tits that give the husband who hasn’t fucked in months something to distract him from the sloppy ripped apart vagina his woman is left with…you know allowing him to feel like he’s with a new doughier woman for the first few months of the pregnancy…usually while she’s passed out from exhaustion…but it quickly loses it’s appeal…and in Penelope Cruz’s case…that hasn’t happened yet…since these are pretty much the first post-pregnancy pics I’ve bothered noticing…and them tits be delicious and nutritious…

And that’s all I have to say about pregancy for now…

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