Teri Hatcher hangs out in a yellow dress in honor of her uncle who molested her when she was a kid; he loved yellow. She is seen with a fat bitch who was also molested when she was a child, but unlike Teri, took to food to try to emotionally eat the pain away. Why would someone steal a little girl’s innocence?? Is probably one of the questions they are asking themselves, and the answer is simple. They were probably sucking on popsicles, running around in Smurf jumpsuits, and sitting on Uncle’s lap….what the fuck else do you expect him to do….if only you were that easy now… I guess this lack of sympathy towards molested kids isn’t gonna go over well and I truly feel very emotional about having written about it. I am a bad fucking person…now come here and sit on Stepdaddy’s lap, you little whores.

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This is the reason people hate me. I post pictures of things that may not be considered sexy. Well I don’t give a fuck. This girl sent me in pics of her tits. She has an infected nipple because she got a piercing, trying to be cool like you. Now her great rack my go to shit when the doctors realize the only way to deal with this is by amputating. I don’t know where the joke is in this post, I guess it’s all in the nipple, but realize I don’t find this hot at all. I find this fucking gross…but posted it anyway because it is all in the name of science. It is the same reason I never got this rash treated, I want to see where it ends up…..

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There’s something about drunk women that drives me fuckin’ insane, and I am not even talking about their puking all over the place or emotional outbursts where they start kicking and crying and smacking me up with their purses. I am talking about how easy a bitch gets when she’s got a little booze in her. I have 2 strategies to get a girl wasted, so that you can have your way with her, one is that you work out a deal with a waitreass to make your girl doubles, and give you singles or virgins, just to retain the upper hand. People will call me criminal or a rapist for using that move but they haven’t even heard the second strategy I use, but I am wasted now and can’t remember it….I think it involves anus though, female anus. Yes, I felt the need to clarify. Either way, Aguilera’s husband looks like that jew motherfucker in your elementary school who never let you play with his expensive jew toys, now he’s doing the same thing, but with a girl we all wanna fuck…I hate him.

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I think with the way people are going insane arresting sex offenders is a good sign that you should limit all activity you spend with kids. That means don’t apply to be the lunch monitor, bus driver, teacher, baseball coach cuz even if you’re innocent some crazy mother’s gonna accuse you of it and next thing you know in 10 years, your on trial and all the little kids, now adults are testifying against you, saying you made them do things they didn’t like. How the fuck are you to know they don’t like jerking you off, I mean it feels so good from your perspective. Fucking brats. Anyway, I don’t wanna get more negative attention from the FBI, I just want to point out that I saw Mysterious Skin, and it seems like Lachey may be masking a relationship with a little boy with innocent games like bike riding. Maybe Jessica left him because she knew his little “shove your forearm up my ass” games. Either way, Mysterious Skin traumatized me.

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I think with the way people are going insane arresting sex offenders is a good sign that you should limit all activity you spend with kids. That means don’t apply to be the lunch monitor, bus driver, teacher, baseball coach cuz even if you’re innocent some crazy mother’s gonna accuse you of it and next thing you know in 10 years, your on trial and all the little kids, now adults are testifying against you, saying you made them do things they didn’t like. How the fuck are you to know they don’t like jerking you off, I mean it feels so good from your perspective. Fucking brats. Anyway, I don’t wanna get more negative attention from the FBI, I just want to point out that I saw Mysterious Skin, and it seems like Lachey may be masking a relationship with a little boy with innocent games like bike riding. Maybe Jessica left him because she knew his little “shove your forearm up my ass” games. Either way, Mysterious Skin traumatized me.

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Nobody cares about these people. Not because they are both moderately famous, but because they are spics and no matter how much money they have or how many drunk and lonely Latino mothers buy their albums, no one will ever really care about them. They are supposed to be dating, or something, which makes sense since they both speak spanish, but confuses me cuz I thought he was a poofter. I am mexican and I would never hook up with a spanish bitch cuz stab you in your sleep.

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I don’t know who this bitch is, but she was in Deuce Bigalow the Europe Version and now she’s in a bikini. Either way, Rob Schneider’s a cunt.

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I like the thought of being walked all over and that’s why this is the T-shirt of the day. I am too drunk to think of anything funny to say about being walked all over, I can go one of two routes, one is the asian rub and tug I went to once where the bitch straps on heels and walks up and down my spine, before letting me jerk off on her tits, OR, I can talk about the canning factory I worked at where my boss used to call me Pablo and treat me like shit for 8 dollars an hour. I am listening to Dolly Parton. She shoulda won the Academy Award. That’s my story.

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